


Normal

by Saramustdie



Category: My Chemical Romance, frerard - Fandom
Genre: Fluff, Frerard, Gerard does not want to be gay, M/M, Mormon church, Top!Frank, anti-gay counseling, bottom!Gerard, my chemical romance - Freeform, virgin!Gerard
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2017-08-22
Updated: 2018-01-05
Packaged: 2018-12-18 12:48:34
Rating: Mature
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 45
Words: 53,975
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/11874816
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Saramustdie/pseuds/Saramustdie
Summary: Gerard does not want to be gay. He does not want to be rejected by his family and the church community he has spent his whole life in. But when his teenage years come around, he will have to do something about it.





	1. Bert is typing...

**Author's Note:**

> Okay so this is my first fanfiction I have done one shots but this one will be around 20 or so chapters. This is kind of based on Manny Mua's coming out story, you should definitely check it out on his youtube channel and well I hope you guys enjoy it. For the one's thinking this will be dramatic, there's no violence or priests being mean or anything.

_Bert is typing…_

I started freaking out as soon as I read those words. I had just gotten a Kik account a few days ago and this kid Bert was talking to me nonstop, I forced myself to reply and be very friendly and nice when he had contacted me saying that he thought I was really cute, the thing here is, I’m not gay…right? Well that’s what I told him because up until now I was sure of that, or more like I had never really thought about it.

So I treated him as friendly as I could, just because I hated rude people and well he wasn’t a “real life” friend so it wasn’t like I was gonna have to deal with him at school or anything. I actually had the guts to ask him what it was like dating boys and kissing them and today I actually got too curious for my own liking and asked about sexual interaction with guys. Why you ask? Because I’m 18 and I’ve never even kissed my actual girlfriend Lindsay. My family belongs to the local Mormon community, I get straight A’s since I was in elementary school to this day and I’ve never drink alcohol or had a cigarette, I have never skipped a church Sunday ever since I was 6 and got a really bad flue, so yeah I’m a good guy type of person and well that was a big of a reason for me to do my own “homosexual research” through this kid Bert who by the way was on the other side of the country. But even with him far away, these thoughts of me maybe liking boys were around me the entire time, and that scares me to death, this can’t be happening to me, I cant like boys. I have to be a good role model for my little brother and make my parents happy, I honestly even started asking god in my daily prayer to help me change my ways. I am literally that scared.

_Well, it’s just like being with a girl, but of course physically is different. Like you get to jerk them off as you fuck them. Or just jerk each other off in case you’re in a hurry or something._

Jesus, for whatever reason I was not expecting to see those words on the screen. I did not know how to reply to that. “Cool”? No way, I just got my phone in my desk before I went to the kitchen to get a snack, Bert would understand why I didn’t reply right away, maybe I could make up an excuse later on. I sliced an orange in four pieces and placed them in a plate, of course I cleaned up afterwards since I got some juice on the table and then headed back to my room, maybe I could just listen to music and eat while my bedtime came around.

As soon as I stepped into my room I knew something was off. There was my mom, sitting in my bed holding my phone, bursting into tears, and my dad was giving me _that_  look, the one you never want to get from your parents. Ever.

“What’s going on?” I asked and couldn’t believe that my voice was not shaking.

“What’s going on? Why don’t you tell us Gerard.” Said my dad, he didn’t sound angry, just shocked or maybe just confused. “Who’s Bert?” my dad asked right away, cut to the chase making me sick to my stomach because I was so anxious right away.

“I have no idea what you’re talking about.” I lied, I mean what else could be on my phone? I don’t watch porn because I don’t ‘jerk off’ like Bert had said, so obviously they took my phone and started reading all of our messages.

“Don’t try to play it like that Gerard. Who is this boy and why are you talking to him like that?”

“Talking like what?” that I had no idea what they meant, I was just laughing at his jokes and asking questions and he was asking me some back.

“You’re clearly flirting with him.” My mom said wiping away her tears.

“I’m not flirting, I have no idea what you’re talking about. I’m not flirting at all.” I started freaking out and getting all defensive with my own parents with whom I had never talked like that. My dad sighed.

“Gerard, you’re clearly flirting with this boy, you’re asking about kissing boys and having sexual intercourse with them. What is up with that?” he asked confused like he was trying really hard to find another reason to this, maybe I had to do an actual research on homosexual teens, or something like that. He wanted to hear whatever else but not me saying I was gay. And honestly so did I.

I ran out of words and excuses and broke down to tears. It was all coming together now, I had never liked football however I was always in the bleachers drawing the guys playing “because of their bone structure” yeah right.

I started sobbing now. I couldn’t believe I was failing my parents. I had never failed them and the first time I did it, it wasn’t with getting an F on an essay, I was ruining my life with throwing a life plan out the window. I was supposed to marry a woman, have kids with them so I could bring them to my parents, well not anymore.

“Do you like boys Gerard?” my dad asked, I had to look down I was so ashamed, I did not want to admit it because maybe if I say it out loud there’s no turning point. But I had to say it, my mom and dad were waiting for an actual answer.

“Yes, I do…I like boys. And I don’t know why.” Now the three of us are crying.

“Do you want help son? What do we do about this? I don’t know what to do. Do you even want to change?” they asked trying to control themselves.

“Yes…yes please I would love to. I just…wanna be normal.” I shrugged and wiped my tears away.

“Alright. We’ll set up the counseling session at church.” I nodded. They stood up and gave me a hug. I was so relived they were not mad at me or yelling I was no their son or something like that. They left my room and I was left to go to bed, which I couldn’t do. I was so scared that the counseling guy maybe would start to tell people of our church and school that I was gay, and I’d have no friends, like what was gonna happen at this session anyways? I started my prayer and with tears in my eyes I begged and asked god to help me through this, to help me be normal.


	2. Anti-Gay counseling

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Okay so first of all thank you all for reading, leaving kudos and commenting. I srly did not expect any sort of support from the first chapter. So thank you! I'll be updating pretty often :)

Chapter 2

Right after school, on Monday I had my first counseling session at church which was not that away from my actual high school, I still had to run because I hated being late. I ran into Lindsey   
unfortunately and had to stop and say hi. “Where are you going so fast?” she asked smiling holding her books to her chest. “I just have a doctor’s appointment.” She gasped surprised.“Oh my, are you okay?” I nodded fast. “Yeah just a check up.” She smiled relived and nodded as well. “Okay then, I’ll see you for dinner with my family on Friday.” She reminded me to which I just waved goodbye and kept running.

When I got to the back office of the church I knew I had never been there, not even as a kid. That made me even more nervous. I entered it and it looked like the waiting room for a psychologist, I noticed a lady sitting behind a desk and got closer  and said “I’m here for my counseling appointment, I’m Gerard Way.” I said lowly like if I was in a library. She nodded “yes of course, please take a seat. Mr. Halligan will be with you shortly.” I nodded and stepped back to sit down at one of the rather comfortable couches in the room. I started looking around and saw a lot of pictures of happy families, and Mormon Churches and stuff. There was a paper in the coffee table instead of magazines with celebrities in them but still I decided not to read it.

I waited for about five minutes and then a door opened right next to the secretary, a tall blonde man peeked out and said “Gerard way?” I nodded and stood up to walk towards him and the room. “Come in please.” He said and got back to his desk in the large white room. I felt like I was at a hospital all of a sudden. When I sat down he took a pen and a notebook and looked at me for a couple of seconds. “So tell me Gerard, what brings you here?” _what a stupid question to ask_ I thought to myself.

“Well, I believe I’m Gay and I want to fix that.” I said lowly just because I did not want to hear the actual word. He nodded giving me a serious look. “Alright, so we’ll be working with the anti-gay counseling.” He scribbled down something, and then got comfortable in his chair. “Okay so let’s be clear first. For this counseling to actually work, we will need time, and your commitment into this process. It’s pretty much like therapy but just to reverse the homosexual thoughts and tendencies. For example, you will need to cut your hair, this is a sign for homosexual teens and men’s that they can use to approach you and distract you from your process and ideal.” That made me grab the tips of my rather long-ish black hair, I had never thought that could be a part of this whole situation. “Second of all I know from your parents that all of this was started by some conversations with a stranger, correct?” I sighed and thought about my reply for a couple of seconds because that was actually not right.

“Well…I have always felt like I’m different. I had never liked sports and always have been on the artistic side of my school, long before I talked to Bert.” He nodded.

“Okay so you draw or something?” I nodded fast, that was actually one of my favorite hobbies.

“And paint as well.” He forced a smile and took note on his papers.

“We’re gonna have to quit that as well alright Gerard?” My jaw dropped.

“But-but…” I couldn’t finish my sentence.That was one of the only things I was good at and that really had fun while doing, I never suspected it could be damaging my personality like this.

“Well, well, well that’s a little fast to start saying ‘no’ to the instructions that will help you to get to place you aim for, I mean at least I thought you’d commit to this.”  He said making me want to reverse what I had said.

“No, it’s fine. I was just surprised and never really thought that could contribute to…this.” He relaxed again and leaned back in his chair.

“Oh yes, it does Gerard. More than you could imagine. Expressing your feelings that way aside from being a waste of time, gets you in touch with your feminine side which we really want to avoid in your case. “ He explained shortly and I nodded. We kept talking about me and my personality, and my childhood, and he came to the conclusion that the fact that I used to spend so much time with my grandma, the woman I had loved the most aside from my mom, was the cause of my problem. All of those singing and piano classes with her, having her support me when I wanted to play Peter Pan and sing at a school play, everything was wrong. I agreed on getting a haircut, not talking to Bert anymore, and not drawing or painting. He also gave me this anti-gay pamphlet for me to read and study for our next session. I walked home trying to analyze everything that had happened and when I got home I told my mom everything that we talked about and she said we could go get my haircut that same afternoon. At least I was now on my way to being normal. 

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Sarah: Thank you so much for commenting and caring :) I am kind of lonely but that's okay sometimes I guess. Thank you for the support. I was nervous since all I've ever done are really short one shots so, hope you keep liking it.
> 
> Thank you for reading again and please leave me a fucking comment, I'm very lonely :) (Sorry Drew Monson I'm taking your phrase forever)


	3. The new kid

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Thank you everyone again for reading, I hope you guys like this chapter, is the first appearance of Frank :)

Chapter 3

I took a quick shower even though I knew I was gonna have to take another one after my haircut. When I got out and entered my room I felt very sad at the idea of not being able to make more art like the one that already covered my walls. I decided to take them all down carefully and put them away in an art supply drawer I had. I decided not to rip them off or anything too dramatic since after this whole counseling thing was over, maybe I could control myself and draw and paint again without getting those tendencies back, so I would like to keep my art if that’s the case. I mean, I worked really hard on it anyways.

My actual dream was to become a great artist. I could draw my own comics since I loved them so much. I would be famous for creating stories and characters that people like me –or not— could relate to. I saw nothing gay on that.

When I was done I got dressed and went downstairs with my mom. We left Mikey playing video games in his room. He was old enough to take care of himself. My mom drove us to the mall quickly since she had to make dinner for the time my dad came back from work. I know it sounds like an almost ancient thing to do, almost like my dad is one of those guys who used his wife for cooking, doing laundry and stuff like that, but that’s not the case. We’re just used to having dinner together at a specific time.

When we got there I gave my hair a last sight and allowed the young lady to start cutting it. I thought I was gonna be relieved when it was done but instead I just felt _wronged_ like it wasn’t my choice and someone had cut it in my sleep and now I was angry at them. But I did choose this, I chose to be normal.

When we were walking out, we had to pass by the fountain where all of the kids from my school would hang out at. My mom said she would go get some fast food since it was really late and my dad would be starving as soon as he got in the house, so she didn’t want to make us dinner in a hurry. I saw the lines at most of the restaurants places and decided to wait there and help her carry the stuff once she came back. I sat down on an empty bench and took my phone out. Just like a bad habit I opened the kik app and saw that I had pending messages from Bert. Of course. I decided not to reply because I hated goodbyes, just like with my art maybe I could come back to him and chat, but that would have to happen when I have had a hold of myself.

I deleted the app, got my phone in one of my pockets and then look around, there were a lot of people here, and that was making me kind of anxious. A really loud laugh caught my attention, it was coming from the fountain where I saw one of the bullies from school, he rarely messed around with me, because well, we were attending to a Mormon school, they were supposed not to beat guys up just because they thought they were weird. The owner of the laugh was sitting next to him, I had only seen him a couple times around in school. It seemed like he was the son of one of the new pastors (they get changed every once in a while.) For a couple of days the whole school wondered what kind of kid he was, was he weird like me? Was he like an _actual_ nerd that wanted to be an engineer when he grew up? After a week “the popular kids” let him in his group, so clearly, he was not like me.

They were just watching people walk by and laughing randomly, checking their phones. Except for him. He was looking around but then I saw him staring at me, without the slightest shame. His plump lips twisted into a suggestive smirk, I had no idea what my face looked like at that point but it must have been a horrified expression because that smirked turned into a low giggle, that caught the attention of Logan, the group leader and part time bully, he saw this new kid and then looked in my direction. He said something which disturbed the guy’s duty of staring at me and stood up to walk towards me. I sighed and almost cursed them. When he got in front of me he smiled “Look who got a haircut. Mr. Way” He said mockingly even though I had no idea what was funny about it. “Want to stop being the emo kid?” _oh,_ so all of a sudden I was emo. I shrugged knowing it was better not to reply. That seemed to not please him. “I am talking to you, answer when I’m asking you something.” By now he was grabbing me by the collar of my shirt, but he let me go rather fast since someone was talking to him. We both looked over his shoulder and saw the new -really short- kid.

“Hey let him go man. He’s just chilling. Maybe he could even join us.” He said with certain amusement in his voice. Like he was really wanting for him to just quit it and even be nice to me by “allowing” me to be with them. “No way man. He’s the weird emo guy, no one wants him around.” When the kid was about to reply I heard my mom’s voice.

“Hi Logan, how’s your mom doing?” She genuinely smiled like she had not seen anything else other than the three of us talking, which was most likely true. I stood up to help her carry some plastic bags. “She’s fine Mrs. Way.” Logan nodded and forced a smile.

“Alright. Tell her I said hi.” She said and started to walk away.

“Will do so.” He smiled to which I almost started laughing. That was such a pathetic situation, he came at me just for a haircut, and then got interrupted by my mom and had to be nice to her, not allowing him to beat me up outside this mall. I let it slip instead of wasting my time and energy thinking about it. By the way, that new kid was nice, stopping Logan and all of that. He seemed too normal to be with those kids anyways and with too normal I mean he doesn’t look like a _douchebag._

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> BTW i would be replying to your comments because i just love them lol
> 
> Sarah: Now I'm sorry to hear that you get lonely, maybe we could be friends since both of us are lonely :D
> 
> tish: Yes, I feel bad while making him suffer and deny himself but yeah, that's the way Manny Mua's story was like :3 and it gets better :)


	4. Lindsey

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Thank you everyone for keeping up with the fic! I hope you guys enjoy this chapter. There's a surprise at the end :3

Chapter 4

Friday came around rather quickly and with that, Lindsey’s family came around to my house so we could have dinner. My mom made a really big effort getting a huge dinner ready for all of us. I thanked her even though it had not been my idea to have all of this people over at all. I did not really enjoyed spending time with Lindsey from a while now actually. I have strong feelings towards her but I guess it’s just as a friend, when we started talking –because our parents are friends- we got along just fine, we’re both into art and stuff like that…but then she started wanting to kiss me and cuddle and…yeah I wasn’t ready, nor I am right now.

Of course I would not tell my parents about this, or Lindsey herself because she was trying to make the first move here, but it wasn’t working so I did not want to embarrass her talking about it because that’s not how it worked around here. Guys make the first move and you only date people from the church to make sure you have the same ideals of marriage and having children. Period.

Any who, I was now sitting in the living room while Mikey and my mom got everything ready. I opened the door when I heard the bell, I smiled at Lindsey’s parents and then her and let them in, my mom came to the living room to greet them and let them know dinner was ready. We all sat down and made some complements on my mom’s food before even eating. The dinner went rather smoothly up until Lindsey’s parents started to talk about me and her. “So, you’ve seen each other too little during this week, I think that after dinner you should spend some time together.” Her mom proposed. I drank my water to not give a reply but when it was gone I was forced to smile to her and nod. I knew my parents wouldn’t force me into something like that, but not knowing what they did, I would have to make an effort, I mean after all I wanted to change so maybe I could experiment a little today.

We finished our food and I stood up along with Mikey to get the dished into the kitchen, I started washing them and my brother was drying them and putting them away, my mom got in the kitchen and placed her hands on my shoulders. “What are you doing? Go upstairs with Lindsey and show her some comics or something.” she smiled and took the dish I was washing to continue with the task. I nodded without saying a word. Lindsey was actually waiting in the living room. I smiled at her and motion for her to go first. She went up the stairs and I stared at my feet as I followed, I’m pretty sure she was swaying her hips more than she would regularly do while I was behind her, that made me kind of cringe but put on a smile as I opened my room, since she was now facing me.

I stepped inside “I used to have some of my art on my walls but I…” I sighed and looked around just like she was doing it “I decided to take it down for a while.” She nodded.

“So you can get new one as soon as you have more?” she tried to guess. Oh, if only she knew. I smiled at her.

“Yes, that’s right. So, I’m not sure what you would like to do, I have a guitar and I-“I was interrupted by her getting closer to me and I realized I was rambling.

“I actually wanted to just spend some time with you, you know like the couple we’re supposed to be” She shrugged smiling and sat down in the edge of my bed. I got nervous right away.

“O-okay and what do you want to talk about or..?” I asked as I sat down. She just took my hand in hers. Okay, I could handle that, and actually I should be able to handle way more because, this is how my life was supposed to be from now on. I mean, I was gonna have to have sexual intercourse in order to have kids, the ones my parents have always wanted me to have and the ones I would like to have in like ten years. She got me out of my thoughts by kissing my cheek. That was unexpected I think, I just smiled and I placed my hand on her cheek, making her blush and look down. She did have a beautiful face, maybe I had just never really tried to find her attractive…nah, she was just a really good friend up until now.

I looked into her eyes, she was smiling. She was happy, why couldn’t I? I forced myself to very slowly lean in and kiss her cheek. It wasn’t too bad I thought to myself. I continued and placed another kiss this time closer to the corner of her lips. I got even more nervous, now I could see that her lips were plump and moist –like the ones of that kid who stood up for me in the mall- I could feel the heat coming from her skin. I decided to just close my eyes and get my lips against hers. They were very hot and she was pressing against mine ever so gently. This was my first kiss, this was it, I saw nothing fantastic about it, I don’t get why so many people liked this. She parted her lips softly; I pulled away just a few inches to take a breath –or more like _the courage_ \- to do the same and continue kissing her. It was slimy, hot and slow. I hated it and that kind of make me happy, because maybe at the end of the day I was just asexual, I mean the kissing part would be the exact same with a guy and I did not see myself enjoying this slimy mess. We were interrupted my door flying open and Mikey’s voice “Gerard have you seen my- Oh…I’m so sorry” I saw him smile and almost laugh, by now we were looking at him, but I could tell Lindsey at least was smiling “Sorry Lindsey.” He shrugged and got out shutting the door open. I turned to her and said “I apologize, he comes here without knocking all the…Sorry” I ran my fingers through my hair, which made me remember it was way shorter now.

“It’s fine, by the way I like your hair better this way” she touched the tips and smiled “You looked rather feminine with it longer” I raised an eyebrow and looked her expectant, maybe she knew? “I mean, is because of your face- What I mean is you have a beautiful face…anyways I should get going now. She stood up and so did I. “Have a good night” This time she just kissed my cheek, maybe she didn’t like the kiss either?

“You too” was all I got to say. She left the room quickly and I just threw myself in my bed. I guess that was what a normal kiss was supposed to be like.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> So I wanna apologize for not posting yesterday, I know I never said I would do it daily, but still. You've been very loyal to the fic so :D There will be some days where I can't do it (I'm actually an entertainment reporter/ journalist so yesterday i had like two interviews and a concert really late at night) so yeah, I'll try to keep up for you guys xoxo
> 
> Sarah: I know xD I felt like I was talking to myself lol
> 
> Effy Condello: Thank you very much for commenting, I really appreciate your feedback like for real, it made my day :D


	5. Bad thoughts

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Thank you everyone hope you enjoy this chapter ;)

Chapter 5

Next morning I went downstairs and had some coffee with my mom and Mikey, she also made us the best toast ever and the weather was really nice, it was cloudy and kind of chilly. It seemed like the perfect morning until Mikey decided to speak.

“So, mom…Yesterday I went in Gerard’s bedroom and found him kissing Linidsey.” He said amused but also trying to get me in trouble. My mom just grinned and nodded.

“Well it was about time I think” She smiled nervously, Mikey did not really know about ‘my issue’ so we were walking on thin ice here.

“Why you say that mom? They’ve been seeing each other for like a couple of weeks, I actually think they became a couple too fast.” He shrugged. Our mom nodded and opened her mouth to reply, she was really trying to find an answer without making the whole gay situation come out of her mouth.

“Well, what I mean is that Lindsey seems like she is actually _in love_ with your brother, so he kept her waiting” She smiled and continued drinking her coffee.

“I see…and are you like…in love with her, Gerard?” He asked before taking a bite of his toast. I chocked on my coffee and started coughing loudly, I didn’t mind if he asked that to me, but my mom was there, and she would pretty much like to know if the counseling was working –even if I only had an appointment so far- so I did not really want to bring up the word “love” in front of her. If Mikey would’ve been smart enough to ask me while we were alone, watching tv or something, I would’ve just said _no._

“Well Mikey…I wouldn’t involve the word love in our relationship…” I noticed my mom was looking straight at me, just waiting to hear some words of hope “Just yet.” I continued which made her smile and almost sigh in relief. I decided to stop there and maybe Mikey would drop the subject as well, which he did.

I spent the whole weekend reading comics and science fiction books with the thought about the counseling on Monday in the back of my head. I was so anxious, I know it was stupid to think the counseling / therapy would work right away, but what if they couldn’t _fix me?_

I decided to just stay in bed telling myself I was not getting depressed over this whole deal. Really late at night I started to think about the guy in the mall. I really wish I knew his name…but not really, because he was starting to become a daily thought which was not supposed to happen at all.

I thought of lips, the smirk he had given me…His lips looked very shiny from a far, maybe he had just licked them…licking…how would his tongue feel while licking my lips? Kissing me…what would make him smirk like that in bed? I noticed myself getting hard in my pajama pants. I kind of hated myself for allowing myself to do it, having all of those thoughts that lead to a boner over the new kid in school. I had never tried doing anything else than taking a cold shower or just going to sleep. For some reason I felt a really big need to make it go away in _another_ way. I palmed myself over my soft fabric pants, I had never done anything like this so maybe I would just experiment a little. But when I touched myself for real, there was no turning point. Maybe I could feel guilty over being a hard on the thought of a boy later on.

I started stroking through the fabric and had to bite down on my lower lip. It felt so good, I needed more already. I pictured his lips again, his voice which was deeper than the voice of any boy our age. I imagined him talking to me…moaning in my ear while he worked his hand over my boner. I just plain rubbed my palm over it thinking about him until I felt something building up in my stomach…I was feeling so much better all of a sudden, I continued even though it was getting harder for me to breath normally, and then I moaned lowly at the feeling. I kept my hand over it until the feeling wore off and then I felt some wetness on my underwear. So _this_ is what everyone’s been talking about. _Oh._

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Sarah: Yes it is. haha Hi Sarah, I'm Sara.  
> chemical_copikat: Hi, thank you so much for taking the time to read and comment. I'm so glad you like the way I write and lol don't be sorry <3


	6. Frank

Chapter 6

Monday came upon me rather slowly, I was almost relived when I sat down at the waiting room, I had the anti-Gay pamphlet they had given me here. I read it as Mr. Halligan had told me and I understood their points and all of that. I just wanted to read over it again quickly to have it fresh in my head since I had been reading so much this weekend. I heard the door open and turned my head over to the masculine figure walking around to the couch in front of me. I looked at his legs first, they were folded up in the couch instead of sitting like an actual teen/ young adult and not like a child. 

Then I saw his arms…there were a few tattoos around his wrists, maybe that’s why he had to come to counseling…then I looked at his face,  which was staring right back at me. It was that kid. _Of course it had to be._ I looked away quickly and fixed my hair nervously, which made him giggle and made me cringe mentally at how stupid I was behaving already. It seemed like we already had a routine of him laughing at me and me being ridiculous

To make things even worst he came up to the couch were I was sitting at, he folded up his legs as well but was sitting on his side to direct his attention towards me, there was no way I could ignore that. I saw on the tale of my eye that he was examining my body, from my face, to my torso and then my hands, holding the pamphlet over my legs. “Hi.” He started shortly. I turned to him and gave a week smile. “Hey.” I replied as awkwardly as I could because…anxiety. He took his hands towards me which almost made me pull away, he just took the pamphlet from my hands quickly before I could do anything. Oh my, now he was going to know I was gay and probably would be added to the list of stupid bullies even when he had proven to be better than them. 

“So, Anti-Gay counseling uh? They’re making you come to this shit too?” What did he just say? Maybe he meant that as in “a friend of mine also has to take it.”

“Yeah.” I replied shortly. He nodded and licked his lips before speaking. Gosh was that like a tick or something? Don’t o it in front of me. He leaned closer as if he was going to tell me a secret. “Is it working for you?” He asked lower. I shook my head but only to say “I’ve only had one session so...” I shrugged it off. He nodded meaning he understood.

“Well I’ll tell you something, this thing only has me craving it more than I already did.” He giggled to himself. Oh, so he was-

“How long have you known your gay?” He asked in that same tone , which made his low voice even sexier. “I’m not-“ He raised an eyebrow at me. What? Was he judging me now? “I’m working on it” I corrected myself “For about a month or so.” He smiled and looked into my eyes which made me most likely blush because then he moved his eyes to my cheeks and later on my lips until I broke the silence.

“What about you?” I asked carefully. He looked away and started thinking about it while humming “Mhh since I was in like junior high. Like two years ago.” I nodded. I remembered what I had been up to last night and still felt guilty but also remembered this other detail so I asked rather fast and excited. “What’s your name? ...By the way.” I trailed off trying to look calmer like I did not needed to know his name so maybe I could jack it off with a name and face in mind. He smiled like he noticed my enthusiasm “I’m Frank.” I nodded again, I felt like I had been acting really stupid and it had only been a couple minutes talking, but, why did it matter anyways? Right?

“I’m Gerard.” He suddenly got closer and kissed my cheek. “Nice to meet you Gerard.” He continued, he looked at my expression and giggled. “That’s how Italians greet people, not really a gay thing.” He smiled. “I’m Italian so” He shrugged.

“I-I’ts fine I was just surprised.” We both laughed lowly, and it felt _right._ Suddenly the door opened up and Mr. Halligan’s peaking head was out just like last time. I stood up and started walking, Frank just stayed there in the couch as if he wasn’t ready for this moment to be over. “I’ll see you around.” I turned to the counselor and kept any reply to myself to look normal and like those words hadn’t made my day.


	7. Plans

Chapter 7

“So you were talking to Mr. Iero?” Mr. Halligan asked me while sitting down before even saying ‘Hi’

“Frank? I didn’t know his last name…” He nodded with a serious look and I was forced to elaborate “Well, I’ve seen him around school and he talked to me just now.”

“Alright. I think it would be good for you to keep talking to him, after all he’s the son of our new priest” He finally smiled which made me almost sigh in relief. “He’s been taking our counseling ever since he got here with his family… but enough talking about him. Tell me, how was your week under this new, let’s say lifestyle?” He took his notebook and looked at me like all of his attention was focused on me.

“Quite well actually.” I had to lie and force a smile. “I finally dared to kiss my girlfriend Lindsay.” He smiled –almost grinned- like a teenage girl would do.

“That’s actually really good Gerard. I’m glad! How did it happen-How did it go?” He asked rather excided if you asked me. Maybe he was just glad that I was improving?

“Well, their parents came to over to my house to have dinner with my family, we went upstairs to show her my room and well, it happened.” I shrugged. He sighed.

“Well and…did you like it? That is the real question.” I could tell he saw my lack of interest on continuing with the story since I did _not_ really enjoy that.

“Yeah.” I lied. He leaned over the desk to I don’t know, pretty much stare into my soul?

“I can tell you didn’t Gerard. Why’s that?” I swallowed then smiled weakly and tried to look confuse like he was wrong.

“I did like it, I’m just kind of a private type of person” He leaned back into his chair this time.

“If you insist then alright…I’d love for that to be the case. But after all this is only your second session. Now tell me, did you read the pamphlet?” Then I remembered who kept it.

“Yes I did.” I nodded trying to remember the information as if I was on a test and not like we were talking about my life here.

“Did you understand everything in it?” He asked which made me remember one of the few steps for “real happiness” that this paper contained.

“Yes actually, what’s with one of those steps saying there’s a certain age in which I have to be engaged, then married, and then have kids?” I was still confused and wanting it not to mean what I thought it meant.

“Well, it means that since you are almost in jeopardy of leaving our community, you are forced to do what we all do here anyways, because we want to of course,” He said as a separate comment “But you have to do it at certain age, since with this counseling you’ll be prepared to do so. Think of this like a video game, once you graduate this counseling in a couple of months, up to how you continue with your progress” I nodded “Since you’ll be completely “healed” You’ll have to prove to your community that indeed this worked and we’ll go through the regular steps into a Mormon life, engagement a year after the counseling, so that’ll be nine-teen…then at twenty your wedding and at twenty-one, your first baby, at twenty-three your second.” He explained. I looked at him like he was lying straight to my face.

“But…If I take this counseling and it works, why would I have to prove everyone that it did by marrying a girl that might not even be the one just because I have to do it at a certain age?” I asked rather _angry_ but not allowing myself to show it too much or even be rude to him.

“I know Gerard, I’ve been talking to the people that take care of this processes that at least to most of the kids in the local community this is not okay, but that’s just how it works in our religion, is not something we can just change even if were against it, and you know what happens when we break the rules.” I did, I couldn’t afford to just be out of the Mormon religion, I had already disappointed my parents so much, our family would be surrounded by gossip, I’m not doing that to them. “The only thing you can do here, is try to find the right girl as soon as possible, but if you already have a girlfriend then I’d advise you to start making up the idea that you’ll be with her for your entire life.” I sighed, I couldn’t see myself with her not even for a day, Jesus. What did I get myself into? “I’m terribly sorry Gerard.”

We kept talking for a couple of minutes until my session was over. I shook his hand and left the room. I did not see Frank there, maybe they had another person who gave this counseling sessions? I was kind of disappointed of not seeing him, let alone what my future normal life would have to like. 

 

 


	8. The park

Chapter 8

That week went on awfully, I had to go to school of course and for some reason I did not find enough energy in my body to do all of my essays and homework, or to even pay attention to the teachers. When Friday came around I had just enough of that hopeless feeling in my chest and decided to sneak a notebook and a couple of pencils in my backpack and just head over to the park to draw some tress or just _whatever_ to keep my mind off of things.

I walked fast like if I had a date or something. I looked around the park, it was rather lonely which was a good thing. I chose a bench right in front of a couple of trees behind the running course. I sat down and carefully took my notebook out and one plain black pencil then started drawing the easy and fluid shape of the tree trunk. I got caught up in my favorite hobby without noticing people around me, a couple of kids running around, and teen or young man doing some exercise. When my drawing was almost finished I looked around one more time, I realized Frank was the one who had been running and doing exercise pretty much in front of me this whole time. He smiled when we made eye contact and slowed his peace to walk towards me. He was wearing some plain gray sweatpants and a misfits hoddie all covered in sweat, and even like that he looked good. He sat next to me with a loud sigh. “Sorry I’m a little tired and sweaty” He pouted and ran his fingers through his hair to pick up some of the sweat “Just a little” He joked which made us both giggle. “What are you doing here all by yourself?” He asked looking straight at me. That sounded like a pick up line from some romantic comedy, was he…flirting?

“Uh, I came here just to draw some trees” I shrugged to which he nodded.

“They allowed you to continue drawing? That’s pretty cool” He said rather impressed.

“Actually, they didn’t…But I just couldn’t resist it I guess” He smirked.

“So, breaking the rules uh?” he got closer and looked over my sketch. “That’s really good. I’m glad you didn’t give up on your art. I’ve been breaking a lot of rules myself.” He continued which made me feel a lot better with myself.

“Really? Like which ones?” He smirked again looking away, almost like if he was ashamed.

“”Well ever since I turned eighteen I’ve been going to a lot of gay clubs, to drink and get some action” He giggled at his own words. “Nothing too serious just a make out with a hot guy here and there, that was until I met my ex slash the reason why we had to move.” He said more seriously, almost sad. “So now that I’m here taking the counseling I’ve started doing it again.” He shrugged “So not just breaking the counseling rules, but also the ones of our religion.” He said amused. “Sometimes I really wish my dad wasn’t the priest, I could do whatever without getting into too much trouble. Like, last Friday I had to sneak out my window to go all the way to the next city just to get to a pub, there would be nothing wrong with that if we were _normal_.” He finished his rambling by taking a cigarette out of his hoddie pocket as well as a lighter and started smoking.

“Well that sounds like fun” I said stupidly, I had nothing else to say to all of whatever that was.

 “Yeah, maybe you could come with me sometime.” _No_ I practically yelled in my head but nodded just because.

“Why are you here covered in sweat anyways?” I continued. I wasn’t ready for this to be over yet.

“Well, I come here and run to be in shape for the wrestling team. I had to join it when they made me quit playing guitar and writing songs because as you know, expressing feelings that way is not okay. In a way, it’s fine. I have too much energy to use so I like wrestling, but music is just my thing. That’s why I’m glad you continue with your art. If my parents weren’t watching every movement I make I’d sneak my art around as well, so if you get the chance, keep doing it.” He almost pleaded.

“I’ll do it whenever I´m feeling too fed up because you know? Were both breaking the rules and the counseling is not working for any of us.” I concluded like the party pooper I am.

“So is not working for you either?” He asked lowly. I just shook my head.

“I mean like I told you, I had only had one session so…” I shrugged “The thing is, I tried to like experiment? By kissing my girlfriend and I just didn’t….” He smiled and leaned back this time, kind of impressed maybe even jealous?

“So you have a girlfriend then?” I nodded like if I was ashamed of that fact…maybe I was just ashamed of being with her when she deserved actual love.

“And what did you try? Like going all the way?” I opened my eyes wider in shock. We were not supposed to do _that_ until we were married. “Okay, so that’s a no. What did you do then?” He asked amused but also confused at my innocence?

“I kissed her.”

“And?” He took another cigarette which made me know we would be there just talking for a little longer.

“I didn’t like it, so clearly this is not working.” I said more to myself, embracing the fact that I was still gay.

“But what about the real important thing?” I looked at him confused “So, girls are a no, but what about boys?” He asked relaxed like we were talking about music or something.

“Well, there’s one…” I started “I think I like him, but I’ve never kissed him or anything so there’s no way for me to really know, because I’m not going to experiment with _any_ boy just in order to know” He sighed and nodded. He understood.

“I’ll tell you what. We can speak about all of this at my house, tomorrow. I like you so far, and I know you liked my misfits hoodie because you’ve been staring, so we’ll talk music, girls –and boys- maybe comics in case you happen to like them.” I almost gasped in excitement.

“Are you kidding me? I love them” I said excited.

“Okay then. I’ll see you here at say, four? And we’ll walk to my house.” He stood up and then kissed my cheek. “Night.” He walked away putting his ear pod on. He looked so normal, but yet he was not.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Thank you everyone for the reads, kudos and comments. Again if you liked this chapter leave me a fucking comment, I'm very lonely (srly go check out Drew Monson's channel)


	9. The kiss

Chapter 9

So conclusions on that (way too personal / random therapy) rambling session Frank and I had in the park; Frank had had one boyfriend already, they are not together anymore, he likes to drink, smoke and kiss random people at gay clubs. He was a bad boy, I liked a bad boy. Of course, the good guy likes the bad guy, what a surprise. I wanted to punch myself in the face for being such a cliché.

As I walked home I started to realize I was going to be in his house, just tomorrow. That was great, I was excited. Suddenly I felt all of my motivation come back to me _for the wrong reasons._ What was I expecting after all? A date? I was so heading to disaster in a sinful lane.

By the time I got home it was time to get dinner with my family. I left my backpack in my room and then went downstairs, everything went on normally until my dad wondered where I had been.

“Oh well I went to the park to just have some fresh air.” He smiled and continued eating. “And why’s that? Needed some time to think?” He insisted to which I shook my head.

“No, I mean I was stuck in my room last weekend so I wanted to go to the park for a change.” I shrugged and continued eating, I knew my parents meant no harm but they were paying too much attention to the details of my actions lately.

“That’s good son, maybe you could even start exercising, you know, join a sport team in school.” He offered cautiously. I winced unconsciously to which Mikey intervened.

“But dad, you know Gerard is not the sports type of guy, that’s why he makes his art, and you have to admit he’s really good at it.”  I sighed, I just wanted for the conversation to be over. I would most likely talk about this whole situation to Mikey later on so he could avoid these subjects.

“Yeah I know but it’s not bad at all to do some exercise every one in a while, and I’m not talking just about Gerard.” He snickered to which Mikey felt a little bad about, I could see it in his expression.

The next day I woke up rather early for a Saturday, I had a shower right away and took my time in deciding which band tee I wanted to wear that day, maybe one of my favorite band ones so we had something to talk about, but one that Frank also likes and of course, it has to be one of those that fits just right. I decided to just grab a plain black t shirt and a green day hoodie with the ‘American idiot’ hand grenade, it was kind of chilly, which oddly enough made me feel less anxious, or nervous.

Neither of my parents were home so I just told Mikey I’d be out for a couple of hours and that once I was back I wanted or more like _needed_ to talk to him. I felt so bad that I hadn’t speak with him about this matter, he was my best friend, and ever since I got all caught up in myself I stopped spending time with him and he was aware of this as well, the reason why we were ignoring this? Maybe he had his own issues to think about, but I would find out about it today.

By 3:50 I was already at the park, same bench and everything. At around 4:05 I saw Frank walking towards me. I stood up slowly, not wanting to look too excited. “Hey.” He said and touched my shoulder then kissed my cheek as usual. _As usual,_ that thought got me really happy.  “My house is not that far away from here.” He smiled at me I just nodded. “You’re quiet today.”

“Sorry, is just that the weather is so nice I kinda got too relaxed to talk I guess.” We both giggled and continued walking a couple blocks away from my actual house. “I get it, well if you wanna nap that’s okay with me.” He shrugged.

“Actually that sounds nice” I said, maybe if I got comfortable enough I could actually sleep a little, I mean I woke up really early so I was quite tired. When we got there I noticed his house looked just like mine, when we went upstairs to his room, I also noticed his room looked pretty much like mine, he had some band posters and a couple video games, cd’s and dvd’s laying around.

“Are you hungry or something?” I shook my head. “Come on, I know you are, I’ll get us some PB&J, you can’t say no to that.” He smiled and  left the room quickly, I was left to wander around, I noticed a stereo and went through his cd’s, they were pretty much the one’s I owned but he had an addition of heavier metal stuff, and was lacking some of my British favorites.

He came back with two plates and couple of sodas under his arm “anything you’d like to listen to?” he placed everything in his bed before sitting down and leaning back into the wall.

“Yeah, I think we can stick to Oasis for now.” I said after playing the CD on his stereo and walked over to a chair near his bed, I sat down and took the plate he was handing me. We started talking about music, we had a lot of the same preferences in comics and movies, not just the music which was really cool, we laughed and talked about our favorite songs ever because of how they made us feel, and the message they had as well.

“Okay, so let’s talk about your girlfriend.” He continued after finishing his sandwich.

“Wow, cut to the chase uh? Okay…what do you want to know?” I asked nervously.

“Well, do you like her for real? Why was your first kiss so shitty?” I sighed and leaned back in the chair, by now my shoes were off and my feet were resting on the edge of his bed.

“The thing is I like her as a friend I think, she is in fact beautiful but I’ve never felt the urge of kissing her or anything” I scrunched up my face. “And the kiss… I imagined it less wet?” I said lower which made him laugh loudly.

“Well, maybe she just didn’t know how to kiss someone, maybe it was her first kiss as well” I shrugged. “Well, anyway. Come here.” He instructed towards the empty space next to him. I looked at him confused. “I’m just gonna show you what a good kiss is like.”


	10. The Fight

 

Chapter 10

I was so nervous, even when I came here and knew he was being flirty I did not picture myself being kissed by him, I thought we were just going to talk?

“I-I’m not so sure about that.” I said and stayed in my spot, he smiled and caressed my leg trying to encourage me

“Come on, I just want you to be able to tell if you like boys kisses better than girl kisses, it’ll help you out, I mean you could be gay, straight or bi. Who knows? Besides is just a small one. I’ll take care of you.” He joked at the end. I would in fact like to know what it felt like, maybe it would be just as gross as kissing Lindsey and I could go running to Mr. Halligans office claiming I was asexual and not gay, maybe like that I could be excused from counseling forever and just live like the weird single guy that died a virgin. I decided to stand up and go over with him. I sat carefully next to him, he caressed my arm to make me feel at ease.

“Is just a small kiss, okay? Don’t worry.” He whispered getting closer, he was looking into my eyes, then my lips and smiled at me which indeed made me feel more secure about this whole thing. He first placed a hand on my cheek, gently and pulling some of my shorter hair back. I looked at him closely. He had the most weird eye color I had ever seen, but I liked it, it seemed like he used to have a piercing over his bottom lip…and god, his lips, they were pink and plump and even prettier up close. I felt him and saw him leaning in closer then felt his soft lips against mine. He didn’t move them for a little bit. They were warm, but not as slimy as Lindsey’s, and then he twisted a little and pressed in a bit more, which actually felt better. Then he parted his lips and I was forced to do the same. _Forced,_ yeah right. Then I felt his even warmer and wetter tongue running over my bottom lip. That actually felt really, really good. I allowed him to continue and he slide it inside my mouth carefully, I moved my own and suddenly it was a wrestle between our tongues, a slow hot and plain sensual tongue wrestle. He stopped shortly and licked my bottom before pulling away smiling, he was looking at me waiting for an answer. I stared at my feet and cleared my throat.

“I’m still gay.” I confessed which fortunately came across as a funny comment to him.

“I’m glad that I helped you realize it, but I’m also sorry…for  you.” He giggled to which I nodded.”Do you know about…what has to happen once we finish the counseling?” He asked cautiously in case I did not know. I just nodded and stared at my hands, I started fidgeting my fingers unconsciously. “So you’re proposing to your girl or do you think you´ll find a different one?” he asked lighting a cigarette.

“Um…I don’t really know. I really want or need this to work so if Lindsey and I can’t get alone that well, I’ll have to see what my options are. What about you?” I turned to him. I was getting comfortable, I mean we were becoming friends…at least I’d like to think so.

“Well…I think that as soon as high school is over I’m just gonna drop everything, the counseling will be over by then but I’m not ruining some girl’s life by engaging and then saying ‘Sorry, I’m gay. Bye.’ So I’ll take my distance from religion and my family…And if you happen to do what they told you, you know, that’s fine. Maybe you’ll become “normal” so you won’t have the need to lie. The only difference here is that I’m not changing. I can’t.” I stayed silent, even when he said it was okay for me to technically lie and I quote ‘ruin some girl’s life” that was making me feel really fed up now, I mean he didn’t know my reasons….at least he could’ve the truth a little nicer to not make me feel like the shittiest person ever. “You’re really quiet…Oh my I’m so sorry that wasn’t like a mean comment for you it’s just my point of view for myself, but you can and most likely will become straight so as I said you won’t have to lie and that comment did not apply to you…I’m sorry if it made you feel bad.” He said quickly, his voice told me he really meant that apology but something inside me was just very defensive about the situation.

“You don’t even know my reasons to attend to this counseling thing. I want to be normal, I can’t be gay, I don’t wanna be gay so I’m trying really hard, not for Lindsey but for my family and myself. I don’t know if you are not that close to your family or if you just like being the bad boy that breaks all rules and that’s why you don’t care about doing things right with your family and our religion but I do, so excuse me if I make an effort here.” I said fast and stood up to grab my stuff and leave.

“No Gerard, please don’t take it that way. I’m so sorry I really screwed up…please stay let’s talk about this please?”

“You already said enough, and so did I.” I opened the door and went downstairs as fast as I could without tripping.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> The_Sarcastic_Cloud: Thank you for commenting, I'm glad you enjoy the fic so much :,D  
> half-doomed: There you have it xD  
> Venom: Yay I'm glad you like it and want me to continue, which I'll of. Thanks for the comment :D
> 
> Thank you everyone for reading, leaving kudos, bookmarking it and commenting. I really like this story so I'm trying my best


	11. Mikey

Chapter 11

 I practically ran home. I needed to talk to Mikey so badly. He always made me feel better. When I got there he was on the living room watching one of our favorites; the twilight zone. I hated to interrupt him but I did it anyways.

“Hey Mikes, can we talk please?” He turned his head from the screen with a worried look. “What’s wrong?” he asked. I took the remote to turn the TV off. I took a deep breath and closed my eyes, I did not want to see his reaction.

“I’m Gay.” Silence. Just silence for a couple of seconds.

“Don’t yell it or mom and dad will know. They could come back any minute.” He whispered rather loudly.

“They know Mikey, they caught me talking to a gay online and then offered me help. Which I took so I’m going to counseling at church every Monday after school. I’ve only had two sessions but I’m not really sure if it’s working because I met this guy and I- “he close his eyes and sighed

“Wait too much information at once. Tell me about when mom and dad found out and go from there. “ I explained to him the little scene that involved the three of us crying, then the first counseling session, then the first time I saw Frank and how flirty he had been and the conversation we just had that might’ve screw things up.

“So he just explained why he was dropping out of church and you thought it was a comment about you? When he said it wasn’t?” I nodded. “Don’t you think that’s just you being defensive because deep down you hate the fact that maybe you won’t be able to change and love Lindsay like she deserves?”I smiled, he was really smart for his age.

“Well yeah I guess it just felt like too personal…but he did say that maybe I could change so he clearly wasn’t talking about me.” I said more to myself.

“I think you should talk to him again. He sounds like a cool guy, I mean he likes the Misfits and Green day. You don’t find that kind of guy around here.” He gave me a small smile which made me relax.

“Uh…there’s another thing, he said he wanted to help me by experimenting with him” He widened his eyes at me. “We just kissed! I liked it…maybe he’s not being really helpful, that’s the second reason why I thought I should stop talking to him while I was coming back.”

“Um, that kid is really into you then and well maybe you could just tell him that from now on you have boundaries and he should understand –at least if he’s worth the time- that you really want to change so that “experimenting” with him is nowhere helpful” He shrugged.

“Yeah, I think that’s what I’ll do. Thank you Mikey, now tell me what have you been up to?” I asked. Turns out he met a girl at school named Alicia, and he was really into her so they had been hanging and that’s why he didn’t really had time to talk to me lately.

I went upstairs after dinner with my family and a whole afternoon watching tv with Mikey. I felt better for sure, I needed some time with my best friend after all. When I laid in my bed the thought of frank kissing me came back to my head. It had felt so good, I actually had to struggle and keep myself from growing a boner while we were at his room.

I kept thinking about it and decided that if I grew one right now, I wouldn’t be mad about it. My imagination started working with the little information I had had from his lips. I imagined him kissing my neck then my chest and just doing whatever he wanted to me. I ended up jacking it off to the thought of the both of us masturbating each other in his room, having to do it fast in case his parents were home was just so exciting to me. Once I came I kept stroking myself trough it and stood up almost immediately to go wash myself. Once I came back to my bed I just plopped in it thanking for not having to share a room with Mikey. I was so tired all of a sudden, I fell asleep to the thought of wanting to see Frank soon so I could talk to him.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Effy Condello: Thanks for the comment, I will sure continue, I'm also in love with the story xD you have a nice weekend too c:


	12. The time Gerard caught Frank jerking off

Chapter 12

When Monday came around I was anxious to go to the counseling session, I even walked faster on my way to church so I could be there earlier. I sat down in my now usual spot and straddled a little when Frank came in. He sat down in front of me and forced a smile at me when we made eye contact.

“Hey Frank, could we talk? I’m really sorry.” He then stood up and walked up to me.

“Scoot over let me sit.” I did so, then looked at him dead in the eye.

“I’m really sorry for what I said, I didn’t really meant it, I mean we don’t know each other that well yet so everything I said about you being a bad boy, and the thing with your family…that was such a douchy thing to say, I don’t even know… I’d like to keep talking to you and become your friend if that’s still cool with you. I’d just like to have boundaries because I really liked that kiss” I whispered “so that’s not really helping me become ´normal´ per say so if you wanna be my friend please help me with that and let’s just read some comics together.” I said fast, he was looking straight at me the whole time.

“You got pretty anxious about his whole thing uh?” He smiled and leaned back into the couch. “I’m cool with it I think we both over reacted and said some stupid stuff, but it’s whatever so, let’s read comics and watch horror movies and just be friends. I’ll try my hardest with the boundaries thing because…” he looked around “You’re really cute. I’ll try to keep my hands off of you, that I can promise.” I blushed darkly and decided to kind of ignore that last sentence.

“Okay, that’s good enough with me. Wanna hang later?” Frank nodded and smiled at me. _Fucking finally_ I thought.

“Yeah you can come over to my place today if you like.” I thought about it for a minute.

“Sure. Ill stop by later.” Mr. Halligan opened his door and smiled at me. I stood up and walked over there. I sat down with him and started talking about my week. He wasn’t pleased to know that I didn’t see my girlfriend at all that week. I had to promise I would take her on a date this week. After an hour of him talking to me about the importance of trying really hard for this counseling to work –and more stuff that I already knew- he set me free to go home. I walked fast for which I had to take a shower and change so I could head over to Frank’s after sharing a meal with Mikey and my mom, during that I also happened to tell my mom that Mikey was aware of what I was doing each Monday after school, she was happy that I trusted Mikey for a matter of that kind and then asked if I was going somewhere.

“Well, I actually happened to meet the new priest’s son at the counseling sessions and we’ve been hanging around, he’s nice. We’re gonna read comics at his place.”

“Oh and…is he going to those sessions for the same reason as you?” Mikey looked down at his food, and I stayed silent for a little bit. Maybe it wasn’t a really good idea to drop that detail into the conversation.

“No, he’s just like the bad guy type of kid, he has tattoos and piercings, stuff like that.” My mom seemed to relaxed.

“Oh well what an awful ‘type of kid’ to be the priest’s son. I’m sure he must be very frustrated. Are you sure you want to be friends with that kind of person Gerard?”

“Yes mom, he’s really cool and he can do whatever he wants but I won’t copy his actions. I’m not twelve mom.” She just gave me a look and continued eating. As soon as I finished I stood up and grabbed my backpack from the living room then headed over to Frank’s.

When I got there, I knocked the door but no one answered, I thought maybe frank got caught up in the session so he should be here anytime, I tried to open the door, it was unlocked. Frank wouldn’t mind if I waited for him in his room, right? I mean it was very sunny outside and there was no place to hide, like a tree or anything, besides it was pretty hot. I decided to go in. there was no one downstairs so I went to Frank’s room right away. I froze when I heard a low sound, his door wasn’t fully closed so I took a peek inside of it. There he was, lying in his bed with his right hand inside his pants, moaning and twirling his toes, eyes closed, he looked so close, all flushed and needy for a better feeling than just his hand. I closed the door as soon as I started feeling bad about looking, the door was actually louder than what I expected. I walked quickly to the stairs but it was too late, Frank stood up and hurried out his room, fixing his clothes and his hair.

“Gerard, you sneaky bastard. Tell me you did see that” he said rather amused, almost giggling which made me less anxious about the whole situation.

“I uh…I thought you weren’t home so maybe I could wait for you in here until you came back from counseling and I did see you, I’m so, so sorry.” He giggled and covered his face.

“Oh my god! You just saw me jerking off…I’m sorry you had to see that. Come in…if you still want to.” He opened the door again and went back in. I followed him inside and watched him head to the bathroom to wash his hands. “listen, let’s not be weird about it, I know we both do it.” _Yeah, but you don’t know I do it while thinking of you._ I thought.

“Yeah, I mean is fine.” I shrugged and left my backpack on the floor.

“Well I’m fine as well, unless you were getting off to it.” He joked. If only I had had enough time…

“No way.” I laughed and picked up a comic that was lying in his bed.

“Hope you like Doom Patrol.” I nodded fast as I kept reading, things weren’t awkward anymore, and we just read and laughed for a while.


	13. the cuddling session

Chapter 13

Once we finished all of the Doom Patrol issues that Frank had, I yawned and leaned back into the wall just like Frank had done long ago to get comfortable.

“How about that nap you promised me the other time?” I said running a hand over my head. I rarely got sleepy while reading, I mean it was one of my favorite hobbies, but for whatever reason Frank’s bed was too comfortable, so I took my shoes off as soon as he lay down next to me. I watched him set an alarm on his phone for an hour later while I got comfortable next to him. The bed was actually small so our arms and legs were slightly touching.

“I just set the alarm in case my parents come home early.” He explained to which I nodded. “Maybe sometime we could actually do a sleepover and have a marathon of movies and videogames and a bunch of stuff” He giggled sleepily. I nodded again I was so tired to even speak. “God Gee, I really wish you liked me and just be with me, like my boyfriend.” He yawned and closed his eyes, I decided to ignore that comment and think about it later on. I fell asleep and had a really good sleep, I hadn’t sleep that well in so long, I think it was all due to having Franks warm body against mine. At some point I turned around to lay on my right side and felt Frank sigh and throw an arm over my middle, I watched his skinny tattooed arm over me and just went back to sleep, because of the light coming through the window I knew we still had time. I slept some more and woke up feeling something between my shoulder blades, it was Frank’s head, he was yawning and mumbling something in his sleepy voice.

“Hey Frank.” I said kind of sleepy still but amused.

“Sorry, I’m finishing waking up.” He said in a lower voice it was just…ugh. I couldn’t believe such a hot guy wanted me. He snuggled me for a little longer while I just waited and pretty much enjoyed this…It was really nice, I was just comfortable and warm in his rather strong arms, which made me think.

“I still can’t believe you’re in the wrestling team.” He plumped himself on his elbow to look at me.

“And why’s that? Because I’m really really gay?” He giggled and I nodded laughing with him. “If you think about it, it just makes sense, I get to grind and hold guys down but it’s a sport. The gayest one ever.” He joked making me giggle and scrunch up my nose. “If we were together I wouldn’t need to do that…after all I don’t care that much about the counseling.” I just stare at him like I couldn’t just ignore that first comment. “I’m sorry, I’ll stop that. Sorry.”

“It’s fine” He moved and stopped holding me to try and make me less _harassed_.

“So if you don’t care about the counseling, why did you stop making music?” I asked sitting back down.

“My dad took my acoustic and electric and ampls and all that” He said kind of sad.

“Oh I see. I’m sorry” I said and sighed remembering that I hadn’t draw at all in days. “Maybe I should get going.” He shrugged.

“It’s up to you, my parents will be here soon so unless you wanna meet them” He smiled to which I nodded.

“Yeah I’m not in the mood for awkward introductions, so I’ll see you at school?” I asked standing up and grabbing my backpack. He stood up to follow me downstairs.

“Yeah, sure. Why don’t you go tomorrow to the gym to watch me training? I’ll wrestle some guys.” He shrugged.

“Sure, I’ll go like I’m your girlfriend.” I rolled eyes at him but giggled.

“Yeah, exactly…like my friend.” he corrected me. “Come on, we can read together afterwards or something.” He almost pleaded.

“Okay, but after that I have to go visit my girlfriend, Mr. Halligan made me promise I would take her on a date and it’s gonna sound bad but I wanna get rid of that _chore_ asap.” Frank laughed and threw his head back.

“You’re terrible Gee, I’ll set you free early, don’t worry.” He assured and I took a step back.

“Okay I’ll see you tomorrow.”

“Bye.” I walked home quickly, dinner time was almost up and I didn’t want to be late.


	14. The Jealousy

Chapter 14

The next day once my chemistry class was over I was heading to the gym before my friend Ray approached me.

“Hey man where are you going?” He asked with his usual smile.

“I was heading to the gym to see a uh…new friend training” I explained shortly.

“Oh cool, I was just asking cuz I’m gonna head over to your house to play some halo with Mikey” I nodded smiling, it was very nice of him to want me there even if it was just to hang out because he knew I preferred D&D over videogames, I did like them but not as much as they did.

“Well, I think I’m busy for the rest of the day, but what about Friday?” I really wanted to hang out with them, it had been a while since we had Ray over at our house, he was always caught up practicing guitar, it was his one true talent so Mikey, his other friends and I would not intervene in his practice time.

“Yeah sure, I can make some more time for my two favorite friends” he gave me a few pads in the back “See you tomorrow” He waved and walked in the opposite direction. I continued walking towards the gym and stepped inside slowly, I could see some girls in the bleachers, a lot of them we’re some of the dude’s girlfriends, that made me feel so out of place. I decided to stay by myself in a corner. The training had just begun, two kids were in the center of the court and started kind of like hugging each other? Then they got to the ground and were trying to pretty much break each other necks.

A few minutes later of struggle and weird noises the couch intervened, the boys stood up and the coach picked a winner. They left the court and then it was Frank’s turn. He was –just like the other guys- in this tiny red suit and had some kind of helmet. He walked over to the court with the other kid. When the couch gave them a sign they went at each other, Frank seemed more energetic than the other kid, he quickly reached his hands out to the other guy’s neck and made him bend down until he was on top, the kid was trying to get away but Frank was holding him still until the couch got close again, they stood back up and the man tapped Frank in the back like he had done a good job.

 When he was heading back to the bleachers he seemed to look for me, he gave me a smile when he found me. I smiled back and blushed. That image had been very suggestive and the fact that he was barely wearing anything, was too much. I tried not to think about the pose Frank had at some point, over the guys back, like if he was thrusting into him, his face was flushed and focused on the other guy, I wondered if that’s how he looked when he had sex…because he obviously had…if that’s how he did it then he liked it rough. I would rather having him do it tenderly, looking at me like he always does, like he’s almost in love with me, I wouldn’t close my eyes like I’m forced to do when I’m touching myself just to be able to look at his beautiful flushed face, I’d like it like that at least at first then, I could take it whatever way he wanted to give it to me….What am I saying? That can never happen or there won’t be a turning point anymore.

 I stayed until it was over when Frank had a match with a different guy, and won again –apparently, I did not really understand this game well.-  When it was over Frank went and got changed quickly instead of taking a shower too, maybe so we could have more time together? He came out running with his bag and kissed my cheek when we were face to face. “Hi, what did you think?” he asked as we walked out of the gym towards the park nearby our houses.

“Well, for starters you’re way better than those other guys, you’re faster.” I complimented because it was true.

“Well you know what they say about short guys.” He laughed at himself. We ended up sitting under a tree while he smoked. “What else did you thought about it?”

“Well, you’re barely wearing anything.” I blushed looking at him with a smile, he giggled and nodded.

“Yeah, the ancient Greek used to do it naked, so this is not bad at all.” We both giggled and shared some comfortable silence afterwards. “So where are you taking your girlfriend to?” He asked with a different voice, he didn’t like the thought of me going out with her, it was easy to tell.

“Um, I think I’ll just take her for an ice cream.” I shrugged trying to avoid the subject.

“That’s boring, if I was to take someone I really liked on a date, I would go with them to a gig, or for a movie in one of those theaters from around here, where you can go in your car like if you were in the 50’s or something.” He rambled.

“Frank, you don’t even have a car.” I pointed out.

“My dad is getting me one soon because he thinks I’ve been working really hard on the counseling thing.” He explained while shrugging. “I’ll take you wherever you want.” I just laughed at him.

“I’ll take a ride home to get away from you as soon as possible but that’s it.” He pretended to be hurt and placed a hand over his heart.

“You meanie!” We laughed and talked for a while, I could tell he was running out of subjects but continued making up random topics just so we could stay there for longer until I decided it was too late to go see Lindsey, which didn’t happen. I told him I’d see him tomorrow, he looked defeated but nodded. “Fair enough Mr. Way. Good luck I guess.” He stood up and wiped away the dirt from his jeans. He kissed my cheek and left quickly. I had never been in the friend zone but it seemed like it sucked.

 

 

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Venom: Thank you for the support. Since there's not many comments anymore i thought the story became boring :/


	15. Bi?

Chapter 15

I texted Lindsey that I wanted to take her on a date. She replied right away, it seemed like she was very excited. Once I was home I ate with Mikey and my mom since Ray was already gone, I was “happy” to let my mom know that I was going on a date with Lindsey but that I would be back in time for dinner. She smiled in approval and told me to say hi for her.

I walked towards the Ballato’s house and knocked on the door quickly. Lindsey opened it with a big, bright smile. She was wearing a flowered dress and red lipstick, she look really good if I was honest. “Hi Linz.” I leaned over and kissed her cheek, as soon as I stepped back I could see she was blushing.

“Hi Gerard, so where did you want to take me to?” she asked happily closing the door behind her.

“We could go get an ice cream to the new place nearby school.” I said to which she agrees and said she would have a small one since she’s watching her figure. I took her hand without thinking too much about it and we headed to the ice cream shop. We talked about the art lessons we were taking at school, we were both on the advanced class so we were both very proud of our skills so far. When we got there I bought two cups and sat down with her. We kept chatting and it actually wasn’t that bad. She held my hand for a couple of minutes over the table, that got me kind of anxious but it was fine. _Just_ _fine._

As she spoke about her last week in which I did not see her, I started thinking about what it would be like going out on a date with Frank, probably we would be laughing our assess off and he would be all over me, I would too _if it_ _was okay,_ then we’d go to his house and read, watch horror movies, maybe we could…make out or something then we could take a nap. That sounded way better.

She took me out of my thoughts by calling my name. “Yes, sorry Linz I just doze out.” She smiled at me like it was fine.

“Shall we leave?” She proposed. I stood up and helped her up. I could be thinking about dating a guy while on a date with a girl, but I could still be a gentleman. Lindsey thought about going to the park and talk for a while which we did, we talked about going out to the aquarium and draw together whatever we saw there. I actually liked that idea so I agreed. I took her home nervously since I knew I’d have to kiss her. She stood in the door and I smiled at her. I took her hand slowly “I had a good time with you.” That wasn’t entirely a lie but it felt like I was just trying too hard and like I looked stupid because it wasn’t coming out naturally.

“Me too Gerard, I can’t wait till next week.” She said blushing, I could tell she was expecting for me to kiss her and so I did. I leaned in and first gave her a small peck, I was thinking of trying the same things Frank’s did. I twisted my lips a little which made a small noise between our lips, I still didn’t know if that was a good thing or a bad thing, I continued anyways and parted my lips, she did the same in a clumsier way then even I had done when I kissed Frank. I slid my tongue inside of her mouth she smiled while I did that. It seemed like she was surprised by that or something so I pulled away. She couldn’t even kiss like he did.

“Sorry, I wasn’t expecting that. It felt funny.” She giggled blushing and then wiped my mouth with her thumb “you got my lipstick all over you.” She explained and I smiled uncomfortly allowing her to clean my face. When she was done I noticed that she took the courage to peck my lips quickly, this time I was the one who smiled when she pulled away.

“I’ll see you soon Gerard.” She waved and opened the door then went in. I turned around and walked home, I did not feel so bad, I mean the kisses hadn’t been so gross, it wasn’t as fulfilling as kissing Frank, but maybe, just maybe the counseling was working. Who would’ve thought that talking about stuff would help me start liking girls –or maybe just Linz.-

 

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Flame Kat: Hey thanks a lot for the comment, I know the drill with school :c  
> Venom: Yeah you might be right, I actually thought the fandom was even less active so even if it's just one comment my day is done haha the girls reading might be the youngsters that just got into the fandom which is great tbh I'm 19 and i read ff every single day like whatevs lol


	16. Decisions

Chapter 16

As soon as I got home I got a text from Frank. He asked how my date was going and if it was over already. I smiled at that and replied quickly. _“It all went well, I’m back home, safe and sound if that’s why you ask.”_ I went to Mikey’s room and sat down in his bed next to him, he was on his laptop and decided to show me some pictures of the girl he liked. He asked me about some dating advice to which I shrugged. “Well you should ask where does she wants to go to, then pay for whatever you have to buy, take her home not just go separate ways because it’s dangerous, even more if your date ends at night, then uh if she seemed to like you so far then you could try to kiss her cheek. I mean is the first date only, so…” He nodded and looked at me like he was really paying attention to my words, it felt really nice to be of help for my little brother.

“Alright, I can pretty much do that. We’ve already talked and I feel a little more comfortable around her now. I really do hope she likes me, she’s great you know?” I smiled in understandment, that’s pretty much how I felt when I first met Frank, I really wanted him to like me and not be able to tell right way that _I liked him._

“As long as you behave as your own self she will. You’re a great guy.” I gave him a half hug and giggled as he looked down ashamed. “I love you kiddo!” I ruffled his hair. I allowed him to answer some of his facebook comments while I got yet another text from Frank.

 _“Did you kissed her?”_ I rolled eyes at those words. Why did he like hurting himself? He knew I mostly likely have done it.

 _“Why do you even ask?”_ I responded, Mikey and I kept talking about school and the Frank subject came up.

“So what’s up with that kid?” I sighed and looked at him. Should I tell him the whole story? The fact that he’s so flirtatious around me, I mean I knew I could trust my brother, but I didn’t feel like talking about it.

“He’s fine, we’ve been talking and I even went to his wrestling training. It’s just fine.” I shrugged, he nodded understanding that I did not want to talk about it anymore.

 _“Because I like torturing myself.”_ He texted back. So my theory was right, I remembered about the time my parents actually read my kik messages so I decided to get a password on my cell phone, Frank wouldn’t stop texting and if they read those words they would be able to tell he was flirting of course, and maybe they’d think I was doing it as well, even though this time around –just like last time- I didn’t feel like I was.

 _“Well, yes I did. And it wasn’t as gross as last time.”_ I added that last part because I was actually excited that I did not felt so wronged while and after kissing her.

 _“Did you think about me while doing it?”_ I decided that was enough. I stopped replying, the attention was just giving him more courage to try and go make me think even more about him. I needed to stop giving head to that behavior. I couldn’t allow him to cuddle me, or kiss me. Just be actual friends. Nothing more.

 

 

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Next chapter will be better and longer, wait for it. xoxo


	17. The first experience

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> hope you guys like this tiny bit piece of smut

Chapter 17

The next day I went to school and had lunch with Ray, everything was normal until Frank decided to sit down right in front of me in the empty seat next to Ray.

“Hi, why didn’t you reply last night?” He asked with a smile, scratching his head while I finished eating my lunch.

“I fell asleep, don’t you wanna say hi to my friend Ray here?” He turned to him and nodded.

“Hey there, I’m Frank Iero.” He shook his hand with the same warm smile that he went around with all the time.

“Hi, I’m Ray Toro.” We were left with a small awkward silence, which was good I did not want to have more of his questions or flirtatious attitude in front of Ray.

“You know? Ray also plays guitar. He’s really good at it.” Ray smiled, he was very modest but I wanted them to talk about something in common so they could become friends too, that would take off some of the one way sexual tension off of me. _One way sexual tension? Yeah right._

“Oh really man?” they fortunately talked about pretty much everything involving guitars and music during the rest of the lunch period. We went separate ways to our classes. By the time the classes were over I decided to head home by myself until of course, Frank had to follow and run up to me. “Hey you’re friend with the afro is really nice.” I nodded.

“Yeah, he is…”

“I saw what you did there, making a distraction so I would stop screwing up.” He smiled “Wanna go hang at my place?”

“Mhh, I dunno. As long as you promise you won’t be…weird.” He giggled.

“I’m not weird, just someone acting normal while they hang with their crush.”

“Frank come on, you know what the problem is with you being…like that.” He sighed and walked in silence without looking at me. I was starting to think it was a better idea to go home. “Listen, I think it would be better if we hang later?” I said and stopped walking, he instead took my by the wrist and headed over to his house, we were a couple houses away already.

“You’re coming with me.” He mumbled. His smile was gone and he was determinate to get me inside his house. I allowed him to just to see what he was planning or what he had to say. He closed the door behind us and was still holding me by the wrist.

“So…?” I asked while he looked down to the ground like he was thinking about something, like he was exasperated. “I should get going Frank.” He looked up at me with tears in his eyes.

“Shut up okay?” He cried out to which I did. I never thought I’d see him cry.”Why is this so difficult? I like you a lot, and I-I” He had to take a breath “know you like me too. Let’s just be together even if it’s a secret but please.” He pleaded and got closer to me but instead of trying to kiss me, which I was not going to turn down at this point, he rested his forehead over my chest. He was still crying and was mumbling the same words ´Please Gee, please.” I wrapped my arms around him, and I noticed it had been the first time I did so, he had cuddled me before, but I never even hugged him.

“Frankie, you know that I need to be able to marry a woman…at this point I don’t know if I want it for myself or just my family…I’ve found that I am starting to see girls in a different way, at least Linz, I’m not saying this to hurt you or anything I just…just need to clear my head…even when I like some stuff about her I can’t get you out of my mind…” I whispered, he looked up at me resembling a little sad puppy. “I don’t know.” He felt so little in my arms, I liked this, I didn’t want to see him cry anymore.

“Please Gee, I need you…I like you so much..” He leaned up to kiss my lips softly. “Please.” He continued saying between kisses. I kissed back and stopped holding myself back. I took him in my arms and pulled him closer. I needed him too, but I couldn’t admit it out loud. We intensified the kiss and he pulled away just to take my hand this time instead of my wrist and then lead me upstairs, I got a little anxious, this is what happened in the movies before the characters did…something.

We got to his room, I stepped inside probably looking like a scared child which I kinda was. He closed the door behind him and reached up to me, cupping my cheeks in his hands and kissing me fondly, I ended up tangling my fingers in his short hair, he took one of his hands down to touch my waist and caress it under the fabric of my thin  t shirt. He made me fall in his bed and I just gave in, I wanted to see how far I could go. He straddled my hips and looked at me like he had never done before, his eyes contained love, but also desire and lust, he was looking at me as if he was a junkie and I was his drug.

He kissed the corner of my lips and then moved to my jaw line, it seemed like he did not had enough of my mouth so then he licked my bottom lip, something deep inside of me needed to feel more, to just let all of my desires and curiosities out. I pulled him closer and kissed him back harshly, allowing my tongue to dive right into his mouth I wanted to taste the cigarette he had had before, the taste of the coffee he claimed drank every morning before school, I just wanted to taste _him._ It was a hot, wet mess when we decided to stop using our tongues because it actually hurt to keep them moving by now, he went back to my neck, he nibbled on some of the skin and rested his forehead in my chest again but just to look down at our crotches that were pretty much together ever since he straddled me. He started bucking his hips slowly, like he wanted to see my reaction first. I allowed him to do it because it just felt so good, It felt like too much but at the same time it was too little, I needed more. He kept moving them and kissing my neck, he also kissed ever spot of my face while we both hissed and growled in pleasure.

“You want more? I need to feel more of you, Gee.” I nodded because I felt exactly the same and was lacking the words to say so.

“I don’t wanna go way further but yes…I need more.” I said to which he immediately opened his pants and pulled them down just a little to have more friction between us, I actually decided to do the same, he seemed please and went right back to dry humping me. Now that the denim of our jeans was gone, it felt a lot better, I even dared to place a hand over his small bum to pull him closer to me and have deeper movements, I had never seen porn or anything like that I was just acting on what my instincts said. Frank suddenly changed his position to get a better angle and moved even faster, that made me spread my legs a little more and buck right up.

“I’m gonna…I’m-“ His movements became sloppy before hearing a little moan slide out of his sweet, pink lips. I looked up at him, he was all flushed and still riding out the sensation while he moved a little slower but was still giving me some friction, that was enough to make me come in my boxer briefs as I closed my eyes and felt Frank kissing my temples and getting the wet hair out of my face due to the sweat “Thank you Gee.” He kissed my cheek sweetly. I looked up at him and wrapped my arms around his middle.

“I wanna be with you.” I finally let out. I had been thinking about the possibility of being bi, maybe that’s who I was, but our community still couldn’t approve that. _Maybe I could love them both…_

He finally kissed my lips before laying beside me with his jeans down his thighs. He looked so happy, that was all that he wanted to hear, I could tell. A few minutes after, he got up and gave me some clean boxers to change into, he did it as well and lay in his bed pulling the covers up to invite me in. I slide under them and hugged him, this time I was the one facing his chest I knew that I now was an addict to Frank just like he was addicted to me.

 

 

 

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> If you liked it please leave a comment, I'm very lonely


	18. Chapter 18

Chapter 18

We stayed in his bed like that, he was holding me right back, caressing my back and kissing me from time to time, I could see it was raining outside and it seemed like it was starting to get cold, not in Frank’s arms though, which was really nice.

At some point I looked up at Frank and felt…I guess I felt the same way he felt about me when he was staring at me. I think I could fall in love with him. I traced his jaw line with my fingers, he closed his eyes smiling.

“I was starting to give up to the idea of us being together…like this.” I nodded and took a deep breath.

“Since I do like you a lot as well, this was gonna happen sooner or later I think.” I smiled and caressed his arm, now that I had decided I was his, and he was mine, I would not take my hands off of him, it felt too good to stop and not use every minute alone that we had.

“My parents will home late, wanna nap?” We ended up tangled up in his bed snoring lowly. When I woke up, Frank was still asleep so I decided to stare and take in every single detail of his face. I thought about drawing him some time later, because aside from actually giving in and embracing the part of me that liked Frank, I was going to keep drawing and just lie at the counseling. I was going to continue working on my art skills, I mean I did not see myself as anything else but an artist growing up so, in order to have a job drawing comics and such, I needed to be more than “good at it” so I would go back to practicing daily again.

Frank made a little whining noise and stirred while waking up. “Gee?” He asked lowly.

“Yes?” he smiled with his eyes closed and got closer to my body.

“Just wanted to check if you were still here.” He hide his face in my neck and left soft, sweet kisses all over it while I shivered. I did not want to let go, I just couldn’t, now that I knew what it felt like having this small, energetic, sweet creature in my arms I was not letting go.

“Hey, what about that sleep over you mentioned the other time?” He opened his eyes quickly and grinned.

“Oh my god, Yes! What an awesome idea. I get to hold my Gee all night.” He smiled and gave me a short smooch. “It seems like it’s too cold to sleep by ourselves anyway so, this is perfect.” He said now looking out the window.

“Yeah, I saw on the news that there was a snow storm coming, that might be it.” I pointed out. He just shrugged and went back to lay on my chest.”I think I could get use to this pretty easily.” I whispered blushing.

“Yeah, now that you let yourself go, it will be...this doesn’t feel as awkward or forced as it does with her right?” I sighed, even when I had not hated that last kiss, I was getting used to it, but whenever I kissed Frank, I was craving it, so _there was_ a difference.

“I guess…I might be bi Frankie.” He nodded and smiled looking up at me.

“I’m fine with that, I know you like just as much as I do.” He shrugged with a mischievous look, he knew he had me where he wanted me, but he meant no harm. I giggled at his words as if he was wrong to be so sure of himself, but he seemed as confident as always.

“So, what about a twilight zone marathon while having some sandwiches and then cuddle up to I dunno, a comedy or a chick flick?” I said to which he nodded fast with his eyes wide open.

“Gees you’re perfect.” We both giggled and stood up to go downstairs and make some awesome sandwiches due to a Frank’s family recipe. And while Frank looked for The twilight zone episodes I texted my mom to let her know I would spend the night at the Iero’s house. She was not very pleased, I mean I had never really had a sleep over, mainly because my parents were very over protective, but I was growing up and I should be able to have fun, I’ve never gave them any issues, aside from…that, so I should have some benefits. My mom then just asked if there was going to be someone else at his house, maybe she knew? I answered that in fact I was going to meet the priest and his wife tonight, I think it was a good idea to throw that word in the conversation because she gave up and said goodnight.

We had the sandwiches on the floor, really close to Frank’s TV which was fine for me, we laughed and such until Frank heard the front door open, he paused the DVD and told me to go with him downstairs. I nodded nervously and followed him.

“Hey mom, dad.” He faced the two of them while I was still going down the stairs. Frank’s mom kissed his cheek lovingly and his dad just asked how his day was. “…Good, I brought my friend Gerard here, we were doing some homework and stuff.” He said randomly, they turned to me once I was in the living room with them.

“Hello Gerard.” His dad said, I stepped forward to shake his hand, he had a strong but gentle grip.

“Hello sir, please to meet you.” Then his mom came to me grinning.

“Oh look at you, you’re a real cutie.” She giggled and gave me a hug, which I gave back with a genuine smile on my face. I didn’t really know why I was expecting to meet some monsters, they were just like my family and wanted the best for us, so they were not really that bad. At least not bad to me.

 

 

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Sarah: Hey don't worry about it, glad you still enjoy the story  
> Venom: I will! and btw I realized I'm gonna have to write more chapters than expected, so it will have around 30


	19. Chapter 19

Chapter 19

After a few minutes we left them to have dinner by themselves since we had it already and we went to go back to his room.

“They go to sleep at 9:30. We can’t kiss until then, they can come right in without knocking.” He said rather amused to which I just nodded. I wasn’t really planning on having yet another heated make out session, just a couple good night kisses.

“That’s fine with me.” I shrugged as we got under the covers and stayed a couple of inches away, but not enough to have one of us falling down the sides since, it was unfortunately a twin bed.

“Hey guys.” His mom came in smiling after like half an hour, she had two cups of something that looked both warm and delicious. “I got you some hot chocolate because of the weather, hope you don’t mind…” She handed us the cups happily, I grabbed mine with both hands and looked inside.

“You even threw in a couple marshmallows, you’re the best Mrs. Iero.” I smiled right back. She ruffled my hair.

“Don’t mention it kiddo. I just came in to say goodnight, we’re gonna head to bed early, it was a long day.” Frank nodded.

“Thanks mom. And goodnight to you too.” I said goodnight as well and she left the room quickly. Frank stood up running and locked the door grinning and went back to bed. I shook my head slowly in disapproval but I was rather amused. “What? I’m not gonna rape you.” He snorted and got under the covers to drink his hot chocolate next to me. We finished the last episode of season one from the twilight zone and our hot chocolates as well. “Well, what do you say if we just chill until we get sleepy? It’s kinda early but, you know…I could just look at you all night.” He whispered the last part and laid down covering himself up to his chest with the thick blanket we were under pretty much all day.

“Yeah that’s a good idea.” I said happily, and probably blushing. I laid down next to him, pretty close of course. Frank turned off the lamp next to him and then turned to me again, I could still see the shape of his face, and some of his features due to the light coming through the window from out the streets. I leaned closer for a kiss but felt clumsy so just smiled being really close to his face now.  He giggled and leaned even closer, our noses touched first then he pecked my lips, he threw his arm around my waist and pushed me closer which made the kiss deeper, I opened my mouth to have the warmth of his, he started doing it slower, it became more sensual, he slide his tongue inside my mouth and made a low sound that was kind of like a moan, I knew he was holing himself back because of his parents, he ended up pulling away with a smile, but I had different plans.

“Frank um…” I started nervously, when it came to new experiences I thought I wouldn’t be the one who needed to ask to have them, I thought they were just gonna happen. “Is it okay if we…try something?” I asked in a whisper, I saw that he nodded and fortunately did not ask what that was. I leaned in this time and kept kissing him, I touched his cheeks, then his neck and I knew he got goose bumps right away, I took my hand lower to his stomach and then to his pajama pants, I palmed him over the fabric just like I would’ve done it on myself, it all actually got too real and I backed away quickly. “Sorry, I…” I mumbled but he just hugged me that actually calmed me down a little.

“We can try again if you want, I’ll do it this time, I know what you’re going for.” He said lowly, I thought about it, the idea was so hot, I had fantasized about it while touching myself, it was here now and I just couldn’t turn it down.

“O-okay.” I said, he went back to his place and started by kissing my forehead, he took my hair out of my sigh and then kissed my cheek, very sweetly, then he just pressed his lips into the corner of my lips, he proceeded to give them a peck which I returned smiling now, then he moved to my neck, he kissed it a little bit more vigorously, he moved his lips to the side of my neck which gave me shivers, he got to my ear and started nibbling on my earlobe, which I always thought would feel awful but it was really good, I felt his hot breath all over me, and then his soft lips just playing with that part of my ear, I sighed trying not to make any additional noises, then he took a hand down my chest, he caressed in circles for a couple of seconds, then trailed down to the pajama pants he had borrowed me. It certainly felt way better than my own hand or Frank’s crotch against mine. He cupped his hand trying to get it all in his palm, then moved it up and down until I was completely hard, he pulled the pants down a little after asking for permission, then continued touching me over the boxers briefs, the fabric was so thin, that some pre cum was leaking through it already, he toyed with the head and slowly pulled them down, I took a deep breath, I had never been naked in front of anyone, I knew he couldn’t really see me because it was pretty much dark in his room, but I couldn’t help  but being nervous which went away as soon as he wrapped his hand around me after spitting a little in his palm, he moved it up and down so very slow, I hissed and looked down at Frank’s crotch and decided to go for it. I pulled down his pajama pants to which he bucked up to help me get them off faster along with his boxer briefs and I could see it against the dim light in the room, at least the shape, no details but that was enough to make me even harder if it was possible.

I decided to imitate his movements, I licked the palm of my hand up to my middle finger, I noticed Frank was watching that and he seemed very turned on by it, that made me even more secure of getting my hand down on him and start stroking his dick at the same peace as he was doing it.

“Remember you have to be very quit okay Gee?” He asked to which I just nodded, by now he had a hand over my mouth to make sure, when he speed up his peace I whimpered against his palm and closed my eyes at the feeling, I did the same to him, he just hissed lowly and kept working on me. “You’re doing so good for me Gee.” He whispered and moved his fist even faster, I would’ve never gone that fast on myself but it actually felt very good, he started bucking into my hand since I was starting to get clumsy due to all the new pleasure I was feeling. He only took his hand away from my mouth to kiss me and lick my lips. “Gonna come for me baby?” He asked as he kept bucking so he was running out of air. The room felt very hot to even be under the covers but it just felt more intimate I guess. I just nodded and moved my hand as fast as I could. He growled very low in his throat and came all over my hand, I kept stroking slower but harder as he rode out his orgasm, he was enjoying the aftershocks as I came to that view in his palm, and to my own surprise I was really quiet but enjoyed every second of it, he pulled his hand away once I complete rode it out and licked it off of his hand, I crunched up my face which made him smile. “I wanna taste you” He shrugged I nodded and decided I could try it too, it was a weird taste of course, not nice but I wasn’t about to throw up either.

“I really liked that.” I said cleaning myself up with some tissues Frank handed me. He nodded and took his tissues with my own and threw them away in a trash can by his bed.

“Me too Gee, I’m glad that you enjoyed it instead of being petrified because I’m guessing this are your first experiences?” I nodded slowly. “Don’t worry, I’ll take care of you.” He giggled and hugged me over the covers.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Hey, thank you everyone for the comments, kudos and just reading and;
> 
> Just wanted to let you know that I might or might not be able to update the fic daily during this few days, my country is going through some pretty hectic and scary stuff, I live in México and we've had a pretty strong earthquake, among a tsunami, yesterday some of the states in the country including mine had a sudden blackout for no reason according to our government, so this days have been really scary and i know that for some people in the us it also has been that way, let's just hope all of this ends soon and try to stay safe, if I can't update soon you know the reason why at least. 
> 
> Also if anyone is going back to college this week like myself, I wish you the best of luck xoxo Sara.


	20. Chapter 20

Chapter 20

I had some trouble falling asleep since I was so happy and excited. I never thought someone like Frank could be into me, let alone desire me and want to make me feel good. Because of the religion we were in, I thought I would never get to experience anything like this until I was married, I felt so good, not just because of the orgasm Frank gave me, but the strong feelings we both had towards each other. This was my actual first love, It was actually happening.

I ended up falling asleep rather late and held onto Frank who was in a deep sleep but still managed to hold me back. In the morning I woke up to Frank’s clock alarm. I got in my clothes and then woke Frank up since he decided to snooze a little bit more, while he got up I went to the bathroom and washed my face to finish waking up. He walked towards me and kissed my cheek before passing me by, I left him alone so he could do his business and then sat down on the edge on his bed to get my converses on. He got out and took his pants and shirt off in front of me, since the light was now on I got to see his built body leaning forward to his closet to get some new clean clothes.

He had a tattoo below his neck, it was a Jack –o- lantern. “Hey, I didn’t know you had such a big ass tattoo.” He turned around pulling his skinny jeans on and his t shirt next.

“Yeah, I got it a little while ago when I turned 18, because my birthday is on Halloween.” He shrugged and slipped into his vans then grabbed our backpacks.

“What? You’re gonna carry my backpack around now?” I asked standing up.

“Not if you don’t want” He giggled and went downstairs. His parents were already gone so he got us two bowls of cereals. We ate quickly and walked to school, I was now holding my backpack.

“So your birthday is coming up. Any plans?” He smiled and nodded fast.

“Yeah, and you’re a big part of them.”

“Oh really?” He nodded again and started skipping excitedly.

“Yes! It’s gonna be great, Blink 182 is going to my home city, Austin Texas by then I’ll have my car so were driving all the way there, all by ourselves.” He claimed as if he was telling someone else that his boyfriend had already agreed on being part of all of those plans.

“Umm, excuse me but I don’t know if my parents will agree.” I snorted.

“I’ll have my parents convince them if it’s necessary.” He nodded and turned to me grinning. He was so confident about everything. I envy him because of that.

“Well that actually sounds really nice.” I said in the end and walked up the hall with him. “I’ll see you at lunch?” He nodded. Ever since he started talking to me he backed away from the bullies that let him into his group, so now he would just smoke outside of the school buildings but since I made him talk to Ray I think he’d be able to hang with us since they liked each other.

I actually ran into Lindsey before stepping into my classroom, she said ‘Hi’ so I did not get to ignore her and pass by. I got close and she leaned in so I kissed her quickly and smiled. I felt nothing, maybe because it was a very rushed situation. I looked around as she talked about the class she had on first period and the homework she had to do, Frank was actually standing in front of his locker, he was staring right at us, I tried to say something but he just looked away quickly and went away.

After a couple seconds later I stopped thinking and actually heard her speaking “So, we might not be able to come to school because of that storm that’s coming, I’ll miss you meanwhile.” She giggled, I did it as well and nodded.

“Yeah, I guess we can go to our date until next week.” I said and leaned just to give her a quick hug, I needed to rush to class. “Take care okay? I gotta run.” She kissed my cheek and walked away with a shy smile.

 


	21. Chapter 21

Chapter 21

I went out of English class and walked towards the cafeteria with my lunch in hand. I looked around to look for Frank once Ray had sat down. I figured he was upset about the whole little scene he saw, but I never even said I would leave her, so he had to understand. I didn’t even finish my lunch when I decided I couldn’t eat no more and stood up to go look for him. I knew just where to find him. He was behind the main building of our school, smoking, I peeked form the corner of the building and saw him there grunting and mumbling stuff like if he was angry and talking to someone who was invisible he then tossed the cigarette to the ground and stepped on it with more strength than needed.

“Frank are you okay?” I asked walking towards him, I clearly scared him, but as soon as he noticed it was just me, he closed his eyes and took a deep breath.

“No, I’m not. The only thing I was not expecting to see today was to see you kissing that…” It seemed like he stopped himself from saying something offensive. “…girl, that lovely girl with fake red lips that looks like someone punched her on the mouth.” I giggled at that, her lipstick could be too bright for her face sometimes.

“Frank, please calm down. I never said I’d break up with her.” He looked at me like if I just told him to go fuck himself.

“I know! That’s the worst part!” He said exasperated and ran his hands trough his hair.

“Frank, I don’t want to hurt you by doing this, this is why I first doubted everything…” He ran up to me and hugged me.

“No, I was the one who begged like a pathetic child, I need you. I want you, I want whatever you can give me.” He said and that broke my heart. I hugged him back.

“No Frankie, don’t say that. Everything will be okay, I like you a lot.” I promised, I did not know what the future held for me, really but I knew I couldn’t leave Frank, I would need to think about my options later.

“Don’t be with me because you’re sorry for me.” He said still holding me.

“Gosh Frank, am not! I like you, I can’t stop thinking about us, that’s the reason why I am with you, not cuz I feel sorry for you.” He smiled looking up at me, he believed me and just had moments where he needed to reassured like any other human being, maybe he was not as confident as he pretended to be with everything, say at least about our situation. He pecked my lips, I held myself from kissing back deeper since after all we were at school.

“I like you a lot, I can’t get you out of my head while I’m at class… I’ll just shut up and try to look away when I know she’s around okay?” I nodded.

“I’m sorry that it has to be that way, I really wish it could be different but…let me just get my mind straight okay?” He smiled and kissed my jaw.

“There’s nothing in your entire body that can be straight but I’ll let you think about what we can do about this.” He giggled and made me relax, he was the only one who knew how to do it.

“Okay, sounds good.” He said and pulled away. “I’ll text you later.” He said and walked back inside. I rushed after him to get in class on time.

By the time I was home I just fell asleep, I was pretty tired for whatever reason, Frank was in my dreams as a part of a new bedtime tradition, I was awoken by some noise coming from outside my room, I saw some light coming from under my bedroom door, it seemed like Mikey was playing some music in his stereo and my mom was cooking downstairs from the noise of the pots being moved around and like something was boiling up in one of them. I stretched out and yawned, it was almost dinner time and I slept the whole time since I got here, how was I even going to be able to sleep? I sighed and sat down then looked for my phone, probably Frank had been texting me like he promised.

 _“Did you clear your mind already? I’m pretty anxious tbh lol”_ I sighed, I obviously did not have time to think about it.

 _“I fell asleep, so no big conclusions yet.”_ I replied and decided to go take a shower to relax a little, that’s when I got to think straight. I allowed the water to run down my spine, my shoulders and neck and sighed when it got between the greasy strains of hair in my head. I started washing my body and thought about my family and future plans, high school was almost over for me and before this whole confusion started I had already decided that I wanted to go to art school in NY, I was gonna have to move out of course, how was the whole “plans after counseling” thing was going to work anyways? I couldn’t propose to Linz and then leave her here …but I was not going to quit my dreams of going to art school either. Who knew what she had planned, she was an artist like me after all. What if she went there with me? Gosh I could never choose between them if the both of them were with me the whole time…By the way Frank said he was going to take distance between the church and his family, was he moving out as well? But where to?

The new plan was, continue counseling, hide my relationship with Frank, see what plans he had after school, and go to college to become a professional artist and we’ll see from there, this whole time I’d be with Frank, and maybe I could –I know this is gonna sound shitty but- get rid of Linz while I went to college. It seemed like a plan.

When I got out I went to my room and kept drying my body in the dark. I looked for my pajama clothes and got dressed quickly. I sat down in bed and texted Frank.

 _“I kinda got something figured out I think.”_ I went downstairs and started helping my mom with what was left for dinner, Mikey and I set the table and waited for our dad to come home while we watched TV. The four of us had dinner while we talked about how our days went and I actually enjoyed it for the first time in a long time. When we were done I told mom I’d take care of the dishes so all of them went to their rooms. Once I was done I went back to my own and locked the door, it was kind of late but I was so not sleepy. I checked my phone, which I had left under my pillow, and noticed I got a reply from Frank.

 _“See you after dinner time.”_ I rolled eyes at that. Was he coming here to talk? My parents wouldn’t like that. I was starting to type a “No, let’s talk tomorrow.” But then I heard something in my window, I got close and peeked down, it was him throwing small pebbles at it, he waved with a smile and I shook my head at him but what was I going to do? Yell at him telling him to leave? I went downstairs and opened the door very gently so no one could hear. He stepped in quickly and pecked my lips amused, I pulled away right away as if I was upset, which I kind was. I headed up yet again and he followed me moving fast but trying not to make any noise. I locked the door and watched him sit down on the edge of my bed, I followed and whispered ever so low. “What are you doing here?” He smirked and kissed me gently, breathing through his nose, I could tell he was either excited or horny. He tried to push me down to my bed which he got to do after a couple of tries, he straddled me and whispered.

“I wanted to see what’s that plan of yours” I sighed and tried to remember the questions I had for him.

“First of all, where do you plan to leave when you drop everything here?” I said in the same low, barely audible tone.

“Wherever you want me baby.” I giggled and looked away.

“What about New York City?” He looked into my eyes with a smile and nodded.

“What’s there though? Like, why NY?” He asked and went back to kissing pretty much every spot in my face.

“Art School.” I said simply, it seemed like he understood.

“Let’s go. Let’s get our savings together; let’s go look for places…High school is almost over.” He reminded me to which I nodded, everything seemed so easy but yet it was the craziest idea…maybe if we didn’t work out we could live like roommates? Everything was so scary.

“Okay, I’m down for that.” I said and kissed him back.

“I should get going before I get sexually frustrated.” He whispered which made me  giggled. The idea of doing it as a secret, that no one in my house knew of was so exciting, I wasn’t sure.

“Yeah, okay.” I smiled and kissed his cheek. “You should leave.” I said but pulled him close.

“It really seems like you want the opposite of that.” He giggled and started kissing me deeply to which I responded in the same passionate way, I ran my hands down his built back and explored lower to his bum. “Damn, there’s no way I’m leaving now.” He half laughed and half gasped.

“Please.” I gasped and tried to kiss him just like he always did. I kissed his jaw then moved to his neck and did what I had been dying to do from a little while now, I started nibbiling on the skin of his neck and then left a little bite.

“Gosh youre pretty naughty for being a total virgin” He giggled and started pulling down my pajama pants and undid his jeans next. I laughed a little but blushed deeply. “Don’t worry I like that.” He said and started touching me after he slide his hand under the leg hole of my boxer brief’s.

“I missed this, that’s all.” I hissed out and reached to push his boxers down, I looked down but again, it was dark in my room. I really needed to do this with Frank when we were all by ourselves and take our time, that would be a whole different experience.

“We did this yesterday“ He giggled yet again before I started working him up, as soon I stroked him he stopped laughing and closed his eyes giving up to the sensation I was giving him, almost like if he was concentrating. He started cupping my balls in his hand which made me moan lowly, he took his free hand over my mouth and smirked. “You have to be quiet baby.” He whispered and moved his hand to my hard aching boner “Can’t wait to show you new stuff, do whatever I want to you and have you moan the whole time…be as loud as you want.” He hissed the whole time weight over his hand, his hot breath was all over my neck and face, I could feel the weight of his body pressing me down onto my mattress, I was so turned on. He stroked me fast and hard while in tried to do the same, even though the position was awkward. After a little bit he decided to buck against me, he moved his hand down and got his hand wrapped around the both of us, this was the hottest thing ever. I could feel his hot skin against mine and he was stroking so fast while I heard him whimper and moan unchomprensible stuff, I started bucking my hips, we were so close to each other and I could see the expressions he was doing because of the light coming from the street through my window, just like last time. His cheeks and lips we flushed, his mouth was shaped in a perfect ´O´ when it felt like it was too much I moaned against his palm and came all over my bare stomach since my t shirt rode up due to all of the movement, he kept stroking us together until he came in his hand and over me as well. He whimpered while riding his orgasm out. He retired his hand from my mouth and kissed me deeply, he pulled away smiling and just pulled his boxers and jeans up, I cleaned myself up with a tissue then got my clothes in place.

“I’ll see you tomorrow, you can go to practice?” I nodded and took his hand while we lead downstairs then I pecked his lips before he walked out and turned to wave a goodbye I giggled and went back inside, I hurried back to my room feeling pretty much ready to sleep now. I threw myself in bed and wrapped my body in the blanket we were laying on a few minutes I was so happy and satisfied, the only thing that could make it better is having Frank pressed up against me, wrapping his skinny but strong arms around me. I fell asleep to the memory of the past few times Frank and I cuddled up together, holding a small pillow against my chest. I was falling in love for him.


	22. Chapter 22

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Hi guys, thank you everyone for reading and leaving kudos. Okay, right now i'm writing the chapter 26 and It's kind of like half the story of what i had planned, so there will be maybe 40 chapters lol. Now, i really enjoy writing and stuff and maybe when this one is over I'll start a new one right away, I have no idea what it could be about so tell me what would you like to read next.
> 
> also, give me some feedback on this one, tell me what would you like them to do (not just in the smutty area) haha, I'd appreciate if you guys comment on that. xoxo Sara

A few days passed by, it was Monday so I was supposed to go to counseling, however there was a massive storm coming in a couple of hours like Lindsay told me a few days ago, we were at school when the principal announced the news and allowed us to leave the school to immediately to go to a safer place aka our homes. I walked down the main hall of the building towards the front door looking for Mikey, there was a lot of kids walking around in a hurry, and also parents that were there to pick them up in cars. I finally got to find him and walked up to him smiling in relief.

“Hey, ready to go home?” He asked I nodded but subconsciously looked around looking for Frank “It seems like you aren’t, are you looking for that kid?” He asked to which I just nodded still looking for him, I looked towards the door , he opened it and smiled as soon as he saw me, he ran up to me and half hugged me.

“I was looking for you inside.” He said and then looked at Mikey.”Hey, you must be Michael.” He said happy and hugged my brother quickly, he giggled and nodded.

“Yeah, but everyone calls me Mikey.” He nodded. “Now, wanna hang at our house so while the storm passes? We better hurry up anyaway.” I turned to Frank excited, I wanted my brother to like Frank, after all I would be spending _a lot_ of time with him.

“Sure, my dad is at church still and my mom is at my grandma because she knew the storm was coming.” He shrugged.

“Well, our dad is at work right now and mom is…?” I turned to Mikey just wondering if he knew where she was at, she was supposed to be home but I wanted to make sure because at this point, even if she went to the grocery store, she could get stuck in it because of the shitty weather.

“Yeah she texted me and said she came back from buying food so we don’t run out of it during the storm.” I nodded and turned to Frank.

“Okay then, come on Frank, were all clear.” I giggled and walked with both of them. Mikey walked in front of us, while Frank and I spoke about being able to skip counseling Monday.

“Yeah, the good thing is that my birthday is in a couple weeks, and I know what my present will be.” He said excited and looked at me with that goddamn charming smile of his, then leaned close with the intention if reaching my lips but pulled away to keep himself from kissing me.

“So, your car is the gift or the concert tickets?” I asked to prevent ourselves from acting like we would usually do behind closed doors.

“Both and there’s a plus, I thought I was gonna have to drive us back in the middle of the night, but my grandma already sent me money so…we can stay at a hotel.” He whispered the last part and I just nodded, in my head I started panicking, that meant a whole night, together, by ourselves, in a place where you don’t have to worry about who listens to what you’re doing in your room…was I ready? I was gonna have to be, I wanted it after all.

“Okay, that’s good. Your parents spoil you a little don’t you think?” I giggled, he shrugged.

“I’m an only child so…”  Mikey unlocked the door and stepped inside, then we followed him. Mom came to the door greeting us and thanking god that we were okay, of course she noticed Frank.

“Hi mom, I brought my friend Frank, the pastor’s son as you may remember him. He was going to be alone at home during the storm so I thought he could join us.” She smiled and stepped forward to shake his hand.

“Of course, I’m Donna Way.” Frank shook her hand gently as he showed his warm smile.

“Gerard has talked to me a lot about you, I’m Frank Iero.”

“Well, make yourself at home, the meal is ready if you guys are hungry.” Mikey and I nodded.

“Great, I am very hungry.” I walked towards the kitchen to help her set the table while Mikey and Frank sat down in the couch and started talking about video games that we could play later.

When everything was ready we all sat down together and ate after thanking god for the food and praying for everyone we knew to be safe during the events of the day.

My mom asked –of course, like any other mother would do- a bunch of questions to Frank, who answered happily.

“So, I can tell you’re at least part Italian, did you used to uh, live there?” She asked before taking another bite of her meat, the same one that Frank had refused to eat since he was vegetarian.

“Well, my grandparents are the ones who emigrated from Italy when my parents weren’t even born.” He explained shortly. We went on and off like that until we were all done. Mikey was the one who took care of the dishes now and while he did that I looked out the window and watched as it snowed heavily outside. Frank and I decided we would rest for a while before hanging with my little brother, we went to my room, which Frank had been already at but of course no one knew that. We lay under the covers after I locked the door behind me.

“I missed you last night” Frank smiled and took one of the pillows from my bed.

“And let me guess, you decided to pretend this pillow was me?” He asked with a smirk and then pulled it close to his face to inhale my scent. I nodded with a blush. “Well, good thing you get to cuddle me right now.” He said and leaned closer to wrap his arms around me, I kissed him for the first time in the day and when he pulled away I actually stayed in the same spot to take a closer look to his lips, they were very pigmented and pink, the bottom lip was plumper and even though they were small, they still were attractive. I decided to bite the bottom one and lick it afterwards which Frank seemed to like, I then pulled away and snuggle up against his body with my face over his chest. It seemed like he got a new cologne or something because that wasn’t his usual smell, I liked it anyways and what I liked the most about it was that he was trying really hard, he did care about what I thought of him, that was the cutest thing ever. He started playing with my hair which made me relax. We ended up falling asleep like that, safe from the awful cold and snow of the outside.

When I woke up I stayed in bed, feeling Frank’s warm body against mine. I still looked out the window since I never really pulled the courtins down, only when I was dressing in my room of course, I could see that It was still snowing, which actually worried me a bit. I decided to stand up and looked down my window to try to see what height had the snow had reached. I could see that the entire streets were white, there was only a few gray-ish spots where the cars of the people that weren’t ready for the storm drove by. I went downstairs leaving Frank all tucked up in the covers then looked out through the window nearest to the door. I started panicking a little when I saw that the snow was almost reaching half of the door height, we would not be able to open it or walk past that at all. I then went to the living room, where Mikey and my mom were watching the news in which they were showing the images of the storm across the city and the whole state. It was pretty massive, and a lot of people were stuck at their jobs and schools, the actual weather was around 56 degrees, so they advised people to stay wherever they were at as long as it was warm enough.

“I think Frank’s gonna have to stay for the night.” My mom said.

 

 

 


	23. Chapter 23

Chapter 23

I nodded absent minded, the storm was horrible, I felt very bad for the homeless people that were at shelters and such. There was a lot of people affected by this. I wanted to help but I didn’t know how to. The ringtone of my mom’s phone got me out of my thoughts, it was my dad, he said that the employees of the company he worked at would have to stay in the office building since it was too dangerous too drive, they would feed them and get small area for them to rest and stay for the night, we were all worried anyways but he said it was okay and asked us to pray at dinner time and before bed for the storm to go away, and everyone to be safe. After I knew that my dad was okay I climbed upstairs and found Frank laying in bed, with his hair all messed up and watching the screen of his phone, he turned to me when I closed the door and smiled.

“Hey. I’m checking on my dad, he’s going to stay at church and take care of the homeless and some elderly people there, he’s got help with some volunteers.” He said and sat down yawning.

“That’s such a nice thing to do, I’d like to go help” I said and pouted, I felt very useless and so desperate to do something for the less fortunate.

“Maybe when the storm is not so bad.” He said and caressed my hand over the mattress.

“By the way, my mom said you’re staying.” He giggled looking at me with a crooked eyebrow.

“I figured I’d have to, it was all an evil plan.” He joked and hugged me tightly as he groaned stretching out like a cat.

“Well, that was my plan as well, so I guess this is awesome.” I caressed his back. “Hey I have some warm pajamas you can try on, the house is a little cold by now.” He nodded as he pulled away and ran his hands over his bare arms. I stood up to get them from my closet than handed them to him.

“Seriously? Hello Kitty Pajamas? And your parents know until now that you’re gay?” He laughed lowly and refused to wear them. I rolled eyes at him and looked for a more neutral pair.

“Whatever, I’ll wear them, they are very comfortable so.” I shrugged and this time tossed them to him.

“Don’t be mad at me babe” He smiled and took his shirt off still sitting down in bed, he put on a long sleeve t I gave him and then took his pants off and threw them at me with a mischievous look. “Do you mind if I wear them with no underwear?” I just giggled and shook my head, he ended up throwing his boxer briefs to me, I just took them and placed them in the closet. “Ah, so much better.”

“You are unbelievable Frank.” I joked and went over to my bed, the door was locked so I pecked his lips. I took his hand and admired his wrists tattoos, I sat down next to him and made him wrap that arm around my shoulders. “What do all of your tattoos mean?” I asked and he just showed me his free arm right away, I could tell he was excited to show them off.

“Well, the ones in the wrists I just got them to piss my dad off I guess.” He shrugged. “I’ve always found myself doing the opposite of what I was expected to do, I mean just because my dad is a priest doesn’t mean I’ll end up doing the same, so I wanted to make a statement I guess.”

“Was he really upset?” I asked caressing his whole arm, I realized we never really talked about our past, and our families aside from the gay thing, so I was really curious.

“Hell yeah.” He snorted. “We had a huge fight and he grounded me by going to church and be the altar boy for like months…Wanna see some more tattoos up close?” I nodded smirking. He took his shirt off and turned to me, he had a small flame over his left nipple and it said the word hope – which I had no idea what it was when I saw it before – “I got this one when I realized I was gay and knew I was gonna have to lie for a while but that as soon as high school was over, everything would be okay.” He explained and sighed. “I was able to push my depression and suicidal thoughts away after a while.” I was shocked to listen to that last part, he seemed so happy and confident all the time that I just couldn’t picture him as a suicidal teen, thank god I never got that sad and would defiantly never reach that point, I had to admit before just embracing my different sexual orientation and the fact I couldn’t deny my love for Frank, I was in fact depressed, but now that I had Frank’s love all to myself, I knew everything, one way or another would have to be okay.

“I’m so sorry to hear that baby…are you okay now?” He nodded and hugged me tightly.

“Of course I am, I have you, that’s all I need.” He whispered and kissed my cheek briefly. “Let’s see some more, shall we?” He giggled and pulled away to lean back into the headboard of my bed, I got to see two big sized pigeons above his waist band, it looked so sexy…

“I can’t wait until were by ourselves.” I found myself saying out loud without even meaning to.

“Me too baby.” He kissed my lips slowly, I caressed that part of his body and felt the outline of the tattoo I felt that he was getting turned on so I stopped. “Just a couple more days.” He grinned and pulled his shirt back down, I nodded.

“Let’s go eat some snacks with Mikey and play some video games or something.” I smiled and stood up holding his hand. He stopped before I opened the door, he looked at me while took my hand up to his face and kissed it sweetly. I blushed and felt myself acting all clumsy but I managed to open the door and went outside with him, I went down first and he followed me, now Mikey was the only one there since he mentioned my mom went upstairs to take a nap or something.

Frank followed me to the kitchen and helped me make some PB&J sandwiches. We took them to the living room where my brother asked us for one, of course we had gotten him one so he took it gladly and nibbled on it while we decided what video game to play first. I allowed the two of them to pretty much take over the play station that Mikey and I got with our savings.

“Next time I crash here I’m brining Halo.” Said Frank while he stuck his tongue out a little since he was struggling at beating Mikey on whatever game they were playing now. After around half an hour I asked them to stop so we could actually do something that I liked as well, of course Frank complied quickly but Mikey whined a little

“He’s actually good at playing this type of game unlike someone I know.” He turned to me and I just snorted “Let us have a second round.” Frank sighed leaning back into the couch.

“Actually I was thinking we could watch a couple episodes of The Untouchables.” He shrugged and Mikey nodded fast with wide eyes aka his way of getting excited.

“That is actually a really good idea.” He smiled and turned to the TV. “I’m liking your friend, Gerard.” He said to which I just beamed and grinned at Frank, that was the maximum point of approval coming from him.

By the time we finished, mom was cooking dinner, Mikey decided to go and help her out with cooking the dinner since he hadn’t done it in a while. Frank and I were left alone in the couch, he was actually excited for the fact that my little brother liked him, and he said Mikey was in fact a very cool kid, just like his older brother. I blushed and kissed his cheek quickly looking over at the kitchen right away.

 

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Hi guys, sorry for not updating I guess, I honestly had time but didn't feel like it. I guess I'm not liking the story as much as I did at first, but that gave me time to work on other projects, although I'll finish it I promise.
> 
> thanks for the kudos and the only comment <3


	24. Chapter 24

Chapter 24

A few hours later my mom joined us in the living room, for the first time ever we had dinner in the living room while watching the 1950’s TV show that we all enjoyed. It actually went smoother then the first time we sat down to eat, we laughed and shared a couple thoughts on how the show was made and how interesting the mafia of that time was.

My mom yawned as soon as she was done with her meal and leaned back into the couch. “Can you guys help me with the dishes?” She turned to me and Mikey, I nodded finishing my last bites and stood up.

“I’ll help you with that Gerard.” Frank followed me, my mom tried to make him sit down and relax like a guest would do, but he insisted.

“You’ve been very welcoming, I mean Gerard did not even ask you for permission to have me over, allow me to at least help ma’am.” Donna smiled surprised at how polite and charming Frank was, he even took the plates from her and my brother.

“Alright, I give up.” We all giggled and the both of us headed for the kitchen. We washed them up quickly, I washed and Frank dried down, it seemed like there was an unspoken arrangement on doing it as fast as possible.

“We’re a good team.” He said and chuckled. I dried my hands down on a towel and so did Frank, I looked around and when I figured that neither my mom or Mikey were around, I leaned in to kiss Frank fiercely, it seemed like he was just waiting to do the same thing since he kissed me back just as eager. I don’t know what it was but ever since he laid hands on me I could just make out with him forever and let alone do other things – that I was still comfortable with.—

“We have to…” I started but found myself kissing him again. I pulled away but looked at him _begging_ for another kiss. He groaned in frustration then turned around.

“This is ridiculous.” He giggled and I joined him.

“Maybe if were really quiet later…I dunno.” I shrugged, he nodded quickly.

“If you want to, I’m always down for that.” He blushed and just gave me a tight hug, even when it was an innocent touch, it was the most pleasant situation, it was a full filling, warm touching action that I would find myself thinking about until we would meet again, I enjoyed the almost full minute of touch and then sighed pulling away.

“We could go to my room already.” I whispered but then Mikey came right in and ran to the fridge to get a coke. “Wanna watch some old Batman and Robin?” Frank giggled at the thought and nodded.

“Hell yeah, 60’s Batman, I’m down.” He said and walked towards the fridge. “I’m going to steal a coke Gee.” He said before taking the can, I nodded and took a bottle of water than followed them, it seemed like whenever my brother and him were around, my plans were pretty much screwed. I sat down next to them, Mikey was in the single couch and then Frank and I chose the two seat one. We just checked the news to see if there was any update on the weather, the storm was supposedly about to get worst and the day after tomorrow was going to be better, so all classes and work schedules were cancelled for the next day.

After that quick update Mikey got the show tuned in and we started giggling at the intro right away, this was so old and corky. We all got cold at some point, Frank stood up to get two blankets from the third couch in the living room, meanwhile I checked my phone, I just had a text from Lindsey saying she was praying for us to be okay and have a good night, she already missed me and wanted to see me, I tried to send a reply but it seemed like the phone service was not available because of the weather of course. While Mikey watched the show entertained, I decided to cuddle up with Frank, he smiled looking at me and wrapped an arm around me, this was not noticed by my little brother, so we were very comfortable and warm, this was probably the best day ever.

We all giggled at some poor, dad-like joke made by Batman, Frank then turned to me and pecked my forehead, I looked up at him innocently. I felt so vulnerable around him but yet so protected. _If only my family and loved one’s could know about this; my first love._

I started thinking about what our life would be like if we, indeed got to live together at NYC, probably this is what our nights would be like, the day would be kind of alike the schedule I have now. I’d go to college during the morning then come back home –most likely apartment— I’d cook a meal for me and Frank since most likely he would have to get a job and would have the same morning schedule that I would, then we’d eat together and relax while I worked on art projects and study for my tests. That seemed very, very nice, very cozy.

I got suddenly scared by a power out, everything was silent for a couple of seconds.

“This is not scary at all.” Said Frank and that made us giggle.

“I guess it’s time to sleep.” I said and stood up carefully, I took Frank’s hand and  left the blanket bundled up in the couch. Mikey touched my arm as he stood up, everything was completely dark, the snow was covering a very large part of the only window from the living room and it was kind of late so we all struggled to get to the stairs since my phone could not really light up the whole thing.  I left Mikey in his room and wished him a goodnight, Frank did so from outside and then reached up to my bedroom, I followed and closed the door behind me, but also locked it. I could see trough the shadows that Frank was taking the long sleeve shirt off.

“What? Is not cold enough?” I joked kind of nervously. He sat down on the edge of the bed but remained silent. I walked towards him and took off my slippers.

“Come here.” He said in _that_ voice tone. I complied and leaned down to kiss him deeply, he slide his tongue inside my mouth, I allowed myself to follow that game and even give it a little bite. I had never tried that but it seemed like he had liked it. Soon enough my obsession for his lips came back and made me start nibbling on the bottom one, I also ran my tongue over it then pulled away. My neck was getting numb from the awkward position so I dared to straddle his hips, he wrapped his arms around my middle, it seemed like he was eager just like me which made me feel excited, and so happy to be wanted back. I can’t think of how Frank felt when I was constantly pushing him back. He then took his hands down to my arse, he squeezed my bottom in his palms while he hissed, I was getting so turned on by any of his actions. His body was so hot against mine, so close, so intimate. He helped to get my shirt off then I got to caress his perfectly tanned skin, I got to run my fingers over the outline of his tattoos, I happened to like them a lot. I leaned down and kissed the one on his chest then caressed the one right above his crotch since it was such an erotic spot for me, and it seemed like it was that way as well for Frank. I started sliding my fingers down the pajama pants I borrowed him and remembered he had no underwear on, I was now in contact with his bare skin, just caressing like if it was any other part of his body, of course I had jerked him off just days before but I did not allow myself to touch _more_ because of the little time we had, this time we could take as long as we wanted to, as long as we were quiet enough. The storm and wind was very loud, so that could help us a little.

“I can’t wait to show you new stuff Gee, but were gonna have to stick to what we’ve done already…I don’t want you screaming with your mom and brother in the same house so…” He giggled and I could tell that he was pretty much breathless already.

“It’s fine I just want to touch you.” I whimpered lowly as he reached down to grip my now growing bulge inside my pajamas “and feel you…” I whispered before standing up and taking off my pants and boxers. Yet again, it was dark so I knew Frank couldn’t really see me, he still got to grab my hips and run his thumbs over the flesh.

“I want you to show me how you do it to yourself.” He whispered darkly. I immediately remembered something I had planned for when Frank wasn’t around, I had thought of keeping his boxers for myself and to jerk with them…I had heard something about it before and it was a very appealing idea. I turned to my closet to grab them, I straddled his hips again, he wrapped his arms around me to make sure I would stay in place, I got the boxer briefs up to my face and inhaled the scent of his piece of clothing, it even smelled like his cologne. He hissed at the sighed when I started stroking myself slowly, he gripped my bottom tightly in his palm and that encouraged me to go faster.

“I bet that as soon as I left you were going to jerk off with my boxers uh? You were gonna cum all over them, just keep them for yourself.” He whispered in my ear making me shiver and nod, I don’t know what he was doing but that actually got me even more turned on if that was possible. “Come on, you can go faster than that.” I groaned lowly and got the boxer down on my hand to my boner, I wrapped it around it and kept stroking, Frank was looking down and groaned at that. He allowed me to pleasure myself for a little bit longer until I guess he couldn’t take it anymore and got his own hard-on out of the soft fabric pants. He started stroking me instead by moving my hand away abruptly; I covered my mouth with my free hand to keep myself from moaning too loud. I dropped the pair of boxers and moved my hand to his raging boner. I toyed with the head, which was completely covered in pre cum, I then stroked and pumped the head quickly, it was quite long so I had to make a bigger effort to run my hand up and down the entire shaft, he didn’t seem to mind my clumsiness because he moaned against my lips as we kissed as a release of the feelings we were trying to communicate with words we couldn’t yet speak or had not even said to each other.

After a couple more minutes I felt my balls stiffen and found myself humping Franks hand and coming down his bare torso, I then focused on getting him off by stroking faster and harder, he actually let out a moan that was too loud for me to be calm with it but tried to ignore it and care later. He came in my hand and t shirt I kept moving my hand while the sensation rode out, he was smiling until he became over sensitive. “I- stop.” He giggled, I did it as well then pulled my hand away and cleaned myself up after grabbing a few tissues from my night stand. “Sorry.” He whispered, I looked at him confused. “The moan.” He said amused, I shrugged.

“You’re the one who’s gonna have to come up with an excuse in case they heard that.” I said simply and fixed my clothes before laying down. He giggled and received me in bed with open arm, I cuddled up to him and kissed his lips. I could really get used to this.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I thought i was working harder on the writing and having the chapters to be longer but I have no comments, I guess you stopped reading


	25. Chapter 25

Chapter 25

I fell asleep in Frank’s arms after staring into his eyes and leaving small pecks on his entire face, he looked very tired but satisfied so I stopped talking or kissing him and looked out the window from my spot, the storm was still going, I really hoped it would all go away, however I knew I was gonna have a good night, I had everything I could need at the moment.

I woke up in the middle of the night by a pretty bad nightmare, I had dreamt that Frank and I fought in a really big, opened space that might’ve an apartment, he left the home that it seemed like we had created and I was left to cry and try to contact him and my brother to tell him and get economic help right away. I could feel the desperation and the stress even after I woke up, I tried to calm down but it seemed like I started having some kind of panic attack in my sleep, so I was struggling to get air into my lungs, I really tried hard to not be loud while breathing but I totally failed because Frank woke up after a couple of minutes. “Are you okay? What’s going on?” He asked quickly and sitting down in the bed.

“I-I’m- I can’t…breath.” I continued to try and drag the air into my body by breathing fondly but I was doing it too fast without even being able to control myself.

“Did you have a bad dream or something?” He took the covers off of me and wrapped an arm around my shoulders. “Calm down. Breath with me, just focus on what I’m doing okay?” He said and started breathing deeply, inhaling through his nose –something I was failing to do now- and then exhaling loudly, I tried to copy what he was doing and leaned into his touch. I felt very hot and almost kind of sweaty but got to calm down after a couple of minutes of focusing my attention on how Frank was breathing.  Once I was able to breathe completely I sighed and made a grabby hand towards him, he complied to get closer and gave me a big bear hug. “My poor baby was having a bad dream?” He said trying to make fun of me. I remained silent. “What was wit about?” I wondered in my head if I should tell him.

“We fought when we were at New York and you left me and I was crying and so…so desperate.” I finished closing my eyes and just allowing Frank to be the one to hold me.

“Oh baby, don’t worry about that. I can tell you this, if we for whatever reason don’t work out, we will try to fix it like a hundred times if it’s necessary, then if still after all that we don’t work as a couple and you can’t stand living with me, I’ll stay as long as you need and get your shit together, like moving out some place else or coming back to your parents okay?” I nodded, that actually calmed me down, I mean I knew our plan wasn’t to break up and fight all the time, but it was still a possibility, so having that covered was the most mature thing to do, I mean this plan of ours was very childish, so this was the least thing we could do, make realistic plans for a really shitty case scenario.

“Thank you.” I whispered and felt myself slowly drifting back into sleep.

“Good night babe.” He somehow could tell I was falling back into sub-consciousness, maybe because of my drunk – like way to speak. I do not remember anything else until the moment I woke up and saw Frank coming back from the bathroom, he smiled at me and walked to the other end of my twin bed to lay back down. “It’s still like 8 am but I had to pee.” I nodded and yawned then laid my head over his chest…this all felt so homelike. I’m glad he never brought up any invitation to a club or a party. I was so not that type of guy, this was my thing. Cuddle and watch TV.

During the day, my mom and Mikey seemed to be even more comfortable to Frank being around, so I guessed no one had heard that delicious moan my boyfriend had emitted last night. He helped my mom cook some vegetarian lasagna so he could actually enjoy the meal by not having to avoid meat, and they talked about why he chose that lifestyle since such a young age, while I just listened from across the table.

“I was always sick, and had very bad stomachaches, after going with like a lot of different doctors they realized the pain was caused by toxins found in meat and some other foods, so since then I decided to avoid those horrible stomachaches and asked my mom to cook vegan for me, which she did happily. Of course sometimes I eat like, pizza with pepperoni and stuff, but I have to bear on the pain later.” My mom nodded and she cut some vegetables.

“Well, I’d like to get some recipe, maybe I’ll approach your mom next Sunday and asked her for some.” She said happily, Frank beamed. This all felt so natural and nice. My imagination started working and I pictured all of us having a nice family reunion with Frank’s parents, my own and Mikey of course, we’d just come back home from church on Sunday to share a meal together…I even pictured myself years and years later with our own kids running around the backyard, even playing with the nephews that I would defiantly have in the future.  I know it’s silly to think about that when most likely, our families wouldn’t even want to see us after finding out we were gay or bi in my case –which I never really thought about- and another thing was, were we going to be together forever? Would we even marry and be able to adopt? Who knows.

 

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Thank you everyone that commented on the last chapter, and for your support. I guess I'm just not as motivated as when I started, but I do feel like I'm working harder on the chapter length and all that jazz so I'm hoping you guys are enjoying these chapters even more <3


	26. Chapter 26

Chapter 26

That same afternoon the storm seemed to be lighter, so my dad got to drive home at a really slow peace but got home safe. He introduced himself to Frank and made some small talk about the priest aka Frank’s dad. I told my family I was leaving to go to church and help around with the shelter thing Frank Sr. had arranged for the storm. Frank said he was gonna go to help him, because he wanted to be useful to his community, just like me –even though I was not forcing him to do anything.- That’s why I started thinking about the fact that having a different sexual preference is not really a bad thing, I cared for everyone in my family, my friends and people at school and even outside of it, so I did not consider myself a bad person just because I liked both girls and boys, of course I was getting used to myself per say but, I had some hope.

My dad said that we should be very careful and stay as long as we needed at church since it was a safe place in case the storm came back like last night. He also said he would like to join us but that he was very tired from not being able to sleep well since he had to do it on his office floor. We said it was okay and parted with some sandwiches my mom made for us, I got Frank a very thick jacket of course and Mikey borrowed him his rain boots that we all had for this type of situation, I would’ve been the one to wear them but my legs were too chunky for them. We walked outside carefully since I was really afraid of slipping because of the ice and snow and make a fool of myself in front of Frank.

When we went out and were about a block away from my house Frank decided to hold my hand, his were freezing and I had a pair of gloves. “Do you want me to give you one? I wouldn’t mind.” I offered, he shook his head and shrugged. He looked so cute with the hood of the jacket up, he looked like a small puppy on a huge coat.

“I just wanted to hold your hand. Everyone’s inside so no one will see, if that’s what you’re worried about.” He said kind of bitterly, I chose to not answer since of course, I was not very comfortable, of course I liked holding hands with him, behind fucking closed doors. He had to understand I was not “out of the closet” at all, and he couldn’t be mad at me. He silently let my hand go as we approached the church. He opened the door and stepped inside after me. I got to focus on the entire situation as soon as we went in, Frank walked up to the altar where Frank Sr. was handing some bowls of soup to the elderly people. He hugged his dad and started taking off the plain black jacket to start helping around, they were talking most likely about the activities that he could collaborate in so I decided to go up to them. His dad shook my hand smiling and thanked me for my presence.

“No worries, I really wanted to help since yesterday. I’m happy we got the chance to do it now.” I said and looked around. “We brought some sandwiches.”

“Oh, great. They are just having some noodles, so if you could hand them to the people here that’ll be great Gerard.” He said warmly, I nodded and walked toward the people, usually I would’ve been very anxious but I was just happy to help them.

“Hi, would you like a sandwich?” I asked an elderly woman sitting nearby us.

“Oh yes dear, thank you so much.” I smiled and handed her one covered in a napkin since my mom had been careful and wonderful enough to not just give them to me in a plastic bag all mixed together. “That’s very generous young man.” She beamed and started eating it. “And, it’s delicious.” She added happily, it seemed like that had made her day or something.

“You’re very welcome. I’ll tell my mom that you liked it.” I giggled and continued walking past her and looking for other people. There was a small group of guys –that I had seen around the streets before asking for money and living in the streets- and walked up to them, I noticed that as soon as they saw me coming they seemed to get nervous and hide some money and little bags in their jacket and jeans pockets.

“Hey, care to mind your own business girl?” One of them said turning to me, looking kind of upset. I instantly became nervous but kept walking for whatever reason.

“I-I Am not a g-irl.” I stated –if you can say that stammering that phrase would be any kind of statement- all of the four guys laughed at me instantly and the one who talked to me before continued.

“I-I’m not a-a g-girl.” He imitated me…I guess? I just sighed and tried to sound a little bit more confident.

“I just came here to offer you guys some food.” I said seriously and ready to leave up to their initial response.

“And why would I need your food? Do you like one of us or something? I might be homeless but I don’t like being around _fags_ , am I right?” He turned to his ‘friends’ and that just made me take a step back, getting ready to turn around and leave, but he followed my steps and even grabbed me by the arm “By the way, what are _you_ doing here?, I thought Mormon churches weren’t for _gays_ ” I felt something sharp against my stomach and he started speaking lower “Aside from not appreciating fags, we don’t like snitches minding _our_ businesses, so you’ll forget what you saw okay?” Now I knew he was talking about drugs, and I knew for sure that I was being plain threatened to death by some dangerous junkies that I should’ve avoid from the first place, I kept walking back but he had a really strong grip on my arm. I stopped as soon as I bumped against someone.

“What do you think you’re doing? I gave you a chance to stay safe here, I gave you food and shelter, you could be freezing to death already and you come here threat one of my boys? I can’t believe you guys.” He sounded really disappointed on them, and suddenly aside from being terrified, I also felt so bad that people like Frank’s father believed in them and gave them a chance and they would just waste their time and little money on addictions and even become dangerous to others. “I’m gonna have to ask you to leave.” He stated firmly and helping me back away from them.

“Is that so?” He asked obnoxiously arrogant. Iero senior nodded.

“Make your way out right now please.” He stated. They gave me one last look. Which was actually scarier than the actual knife that they held against my torso. They turned around and opened the doors then walked away trying to pretend it wasn’t freezing, they left the doors open as one last act of ungratefulness and disappeared in the middle of the snow. Frank was now approaching us and asking what had happened, I stayed silent until I made sure his dad had this time locked the front door.

“Are you okay Gerard?” He asked walking toward us, I nodded but gulped and tried to clear my throat. Everyone was looking at us which he noticed. “Follow me kids.” He said and walked down the ail with us following closely. We went “backstage” if you will, where they offered me a chair and a glass of water to calm down, I drank it quickly and noticed that –until now- I was starting to have, yet another panic attack. I tried to breathe calmly, I did not want Frank’s dad to think I was over reacting or anything, so I tried to stay as quiet as possible but still inhaled quickly, Frank placed his hand on my shoulder and breathed loudly for me to follow his peace, his dad was not facing us since he was making a phone call.

“What happened?” I looked up at Frank and tried to talk.

“They had d-drugs…” I exhaled with him. “And they noticed I saw it…” I inhaled one more time, I could feel my cheeks were turning really red, and I was starting to feel hot. “They called a girl and f-fag.” I had never used that word before, I felt quite offended, this had been the kind of things I feared about my sexuality, I felt quite angry at myself. “And one of the guys had a knife and he…” I broke down right there. I started crying and covered my face in my hands, I did not wanted them to look at me. I felt Frank’s arms around me and I just pushed him away, this was not helping at the moment, maybe they had seen us through the window walking hand in hand? And that’s why they thought of me as gay. Now his dad was there and could see us, that would be suspicious, he was making everything worse. He backed away but stood next to me until his dad turned to us, I had to make myself stop crying, for god’s sake. I cleared my throat once again and wiped away my tears with a frown.

“Are you sure you are okay? That was very frightening.” He stated and I just nodded “Don’t worry, I called the cops and told them what had happen so they can keep an eye on them, they already know who they are. Do you want me to drive you home?”  I thought about it for a little bit, I did not feel in the mood to help more homeless people at all right now, I just wanted to hide in bed all day. I nodded again and stood up then grabbed my jacket and put it on. Frank walked out the room and did not see him again as me and his dad went out to his car.

The ride was mostly silent until Frank Senior decided to speak.

“You’re a really good boy Gerard. I’m sorry that happened today, you’re very brave.” He beamed and turned to me for a second, I just forced a smile and looked down. I was not, I was so not brave, I wasn’t like Frank. “You know, I’m really happy you’re friends with my kid, I know you’re both going through the same situation so I think is helpful that you guys support each other as friends during the counseling.” I widened my eyes and turned to him.

“Y-you know about it?” I asked carefully, he nodded.

“Yes, of course. I’m the pastor after all.” He shrugged just like Frank would have done it. “But don’t worry about it, I’m glad you’re trying to change and be a good boy, as I said, I think you’re really brave. I would like to change things about myself but I choose to ignore them, you know?” I nodded and decided to just leave the topic there. He parked outside of my house, I undid my seatbelt, I was about to open the door he just wished me a goodnight which I rudely did not respond since I was not able to form word at all and ran into my house.


	27. Chapter 27

Chapter 27

My dad and mom were talking in the kitchen when they saw me walk by quickly. “Gerard?” my mom called out loudly. I sighed and made my way into the kitchen “What happened?” I actually came up with a good lie and decided to explain myself.

“I uh, well the people really liked the sandwiches, we ran out of them quickly so I decided to leave before the storm came back, so here I am.” I shrugged with a smile. They nodded but didn’t seem too convinced. “Are you okay son?” My dad asked in one last attempt. I nodded and moved to the fridge to grab a diet coke and lead upstairs as my parents kept talking about what happened during the day they did not see each other at all.

I went to my room and drank the soda quickly. I felt so wronged and uneasy. However I managed to fall asleep for a fair amount of time. The next morning, the schools were still not ready to have us in to class yet, so it was the last day I’d get to spend another day at home. I was still not feeling great, I figured I just  needed my little brother. Aside from Frank –when things were completely okay— Mikey was my safe place. I knocked on his door quietly, almost ready to have to head back to my own room in case he was asleep or something, but I actually heard a “Come in.” I walked in smiling, he looked up at me, he was reading what was probably a Stephen King novel “what’s up?” He asked and I just shrugged sitting down beside him.

“I just feel like hanging with you.” I said and now just lay down next to him, even If I was suddenly invading his room and bed I know he was comfortable enough with me doing this.

“Alright, I was about to watch the news before watching a movie so, perfect timing.” He said as he turned his tv on. He tuned in the news real quick and I noticed someone had died already because of the awful weather. “The individuals who were allegedly homeless mans, died from pneumonia during last night’s last strike of snow…” I paid extra attention to the footage, I noticed the man’s body covered in a white sheet, his arm was sticking out and the man had been wearing the same jacket as the guy at the church, the number of people they had said was technically the same number of junkies that I encountered the day before so it could just be them. I sighed and started praying for their rest in my head “What a shame. I wonder if they didn’t get to find a shelter.” Mikey said and I just remained silent. He then tuned “Psycho” to which I fell asleep since it was rather early still.

A few hours later I was awoke all alone in an empty bed. I rubbed my face clumsily and sat down, I had gotten cold in my sleep which was too late to fix now. I spend the whole day with my family which I had missed without even noticing, so I got to enjoy their company and also the fact that I was distracted from last day events.

I did not get any texts from Frank and to be honest I was kind of relived that I did not have to take care of that matter for now, I would worry about it later. Maybe we could even forget about it and just pretend nothing had happened, I was of course afraid I had screwed things up, but I would continue procrastinating solving the situation that happened yesterday.

 

Next morning I got up kinds late but rushed to get dressed and grab my backpack before running to the stairs. Mikey was waiting for me with an annoyed look, I just mumbled a ´sorry´ and walked out with him. When we arrived to school, there was few people left outside of the building so I just decided to say goodbye to my brother right away and head to class without even bothering to reach for my locker or anything.

When it was time to get lunch, I was pretty sure I would not get to see Frank at the cafeteria, so I decided to look for him where I knew he would go at when he was upset. I was not going to be able to eat anything since my stomach was a mess due to the bundle of stress I was at the moment, since first period I started thinking about seeing Frank and thought about all of the worst case scenarios such as; Frank ignoring me and pretending I never fucking happened or having a very dense and long talk on how I was a chicken who would just deny the person he liked so much and not being able to find a solution for us. I was so terrified about not being with him anymore, we worked so good together that I just couldn’t picture my life without him now, I couldn’t see myself sleeping alone again without his arms around me. Ugh, I needed to get this solved for my own mental sake right away.

I saw him sitting in the concrete, leaned up against the wall, with his usual cigarette between his fingers, just looking up at the sky. I got closer without him noticing me, until I sat down next to him. We both remain in silent until I couldn’t it take it anymore and sighed loudly and got closer to rest my head on his shoulder. I really hoped he wouldn’t mind which apparently he didn’t mind. “I’m so, so sorry. I was so terrified of what just happened, and your dad was there, I did not want him to think I was in fact, as the guy said; a fag, so having you hug me as I cried, I just-“ I sighed yet again “I was afraid I’d start acting like I did when I had the panic attack the other time and just cling to you…your dad would just know there’s something going on.” He wrapped an arm around my shoulders but stayed silent so I could continue “I know that this kind of attitude is just not what you expect in a relationship, but once we leave Frank…once we leave I won’t care. We can walk down square garden hand in hand and even talk and kiss on the benches there, but please, please do not expect me to come out of the closet here where everyone can gossip about my family and isolate them, they don’t deserve that. My parents just want what’s best for me, they offered the counseling in case I wanted to change, only-if-I- wanted-to and your parents are just as wonderful so they don’t deserve to be hated on and even, in the worst case, get kicked out of the community, they just don’t deserve that.” I finished exhausted. He turned to me, looked around to make sure no one was around and just kissed me warmly. I could tell he had missed it.

“I was so selfish and stupid Gee. I’m sorry, I have to understand your points, which I do, but also respect them so we can find a balance for now at least. That walk together at the square garden sounds awesome by the way” He gave me one of his precious smiles, I knew everything was fine now.

“I missed you.” He nodded in agreement before kissing me again, before things would get heated he pulled away. “Talk to Lindsey today and ask her out for the next week.” He said surprising me, which I guess it showed. “You don’t want anyone suspecting anything do you? You see me more than your actual girlfriend, you fool.” He explained giggling and standing up. “However I’ll crash at your house today.”

“Okay, let’s forget about formalities and invite yourself over, why not?” He stood up and helped me up as well, as soon as he finished his cigarette he got his hands in his pockets.

“Your mom loves me, she’ll want to have me over.” He said proudly. We walked back inside and went to one of our only classes together.

I actually texted Lindsey as soon as I got home and told her that we could go to the aquarium next week so we could actually draw like we had agreed before the big storm. She answered and agreed right away, she seemed very excited and in fact I was as well excited since I would get to draw with her, and she was very talented so I would like to get some pro tips and compare our work and just relax for a bit.

 


	28. Chapter 28

Chapter 28

A few hours later I woke up from a nap to what seemed like Frank kisses on my shoulder and neck. I opened my eyes and realized he was in fact it was him. I looked at him with wide eyes “Don’t worry, I locked the door. You mom let me in.” I nodded and threw my arms around him.

“I’m still sleepy, let me rest.” I whined since I actually did not feel like doing anything just yet.

He just nodded and held me in his arms, I drifted back to sleep for what seemed forever but it jut had been half an hour.

When we got up we had dinner with my family, my dad and Frank talked about the wrestling team and why he was thinking about quitting it. I was surprised by that but I also remembered our future plans and the fact we were graduating high school very soon anyways.

“So, aside from sports, any plan for collage Frank?” my dad continued as we all ate. Frank cleared his throat to keep talking and nodded “I think I’ll just get a year off of school and work during that to save some money.” He shrugged

“Well, the only thing you have to keep in mind is that once you get money you won’t get enough of it, but you can’t leave your education behind okay?” He said and Frank nodded.

“That I know sir.” Then I also remembered he had never talked to me about future plans when it came to school and I just figured I’d ask later.

“So, Gerard do you still have plans of going to art school?” my whole family looked at me expectably. If I did leave the house to go to school and live with Frank, it was going to be a huge change, so I guess they were worried.

“Yes, I’ve already checked out a scholarship and sent my request so I guess that now I just have to wait for their response.” My dad beamed.

“You’ll get admitted, for sure.” _I really hope so._

“So have you thought about living in the campus or someplace else?” My dad asked once we were having dessert which was a really delicious pumpkin pie that my mom had made especially for Frank since his birthday was coming up and no one but me would be getting to spend the actual day with him.

“Well, I actually thought about renting a small department, I don’t think I could handle living with people I don’t know and also the thought of having to walk around in the campus it just…gives me anxiety, and that will not help me concentrate on my studies.” Everyone but Frank nodded, they understood my anxiety condition so I guess they thought my reasons were valid, which was great.

“And do you think we can afford a place like that without having you living with roomies?” My dad asked for real, he was curious and not being sarcastic, I could tell.

“Um, well we were actually thinking that since Frank and I get alone so well, and he does like the idea of living in NYC, and he wants to get a job, we could go together. You know protect each other from the big city.” I shrugged like it was no big deal, you know, everyone moves in with their sexually ambiguous friend that you met a month ago tops and of course nothing is going on between ya They stayed silent for a little bit but then my mom smiled, I still did not know if she was thinking that I just made a very stupid joke or she was happy, until she almost cried in excitement.

“That’s such a good idea! You’ll complement each other so well in a parent free environment. As far as I’ve seen, Frank does not party at all and you seem like a good kid you I’m sure you’d take care of my son.” She said and squeezed his hand over the table, he seemed to be so touched by her words that he couldn’t stop grinning. Did no one realized this was a conversation you have with your son and his wife when they are about to get married or something?

“We’ll see, we have to check every single detail.” My dad said but did not seem too upset about it. I sighed in relief. “Moving on, does the birthday boy have any plans for the special day?” I bit my lower lip, it seemed like it was the day where I’d give my parents every single “bad news” I had for them.

“I actually wanted to talk to you about it Mr. Way, I have these concert tickets.” He listened closely, the word concert tickets just got Mikey excited which made us all giggle “Sorry Mikes, my parents could only get two, and you know, the venue is not exactly close.” He still seemed very sure of himself. “My dad is getting me a car in a few days, so I was thinking that Gerard and I could drive there, go to the concert and stay for the night at a hotel that my mom will book us with the money my grandma gave me, I know it sounds worrying, but I know the city, we’ll have enough money and it’s just for the night.” My dad looked down and sighed loudly.

“You’re giving me a lot to think about Frank.” He just snickered and kept his eyes on him, he knew how to pressure people. “But, since you have to stay at a hotel, where are you even going? I mean is that far away? Really?”

“Well, my actual hometown is Dallas, Texas so, not that far away, I just wouldn’t like to drive at night. I know how dangerous it gets.”

“Do you even know how to drive Frank?” He just snorted and nodded.

“I’ve known how to drive for like three years now, but I’m getting my car until now.” My dad nodded and remained in silence.

“Well Don, if you ask me,  that sounds very fun and well planned. I’d say, have your teenager adventure and just be careful but I don’t know what you think.” She turned to my dad trying not to look so excited.

“I’ll talk to your dad Frank, okay?” Frank seemed pleased enough, after all that was our B plan.

 


	29. Chapter 29

Chapter 29

After an hour or so, Frank and I went back to my room. What seemed like some innocent kisses became into another one of our quiet dry humping session pretty fast, and exhausted we fell asleep.

The days went by quickly, we had counseling Monday, Mr. Halligan was very excited to see me for some reason, and I actually got to excuse the fact I hardly saw Lindsay two times in two weeks with the fact we couldn’t really go anywhere because of the storm, however he was happy to know that I did took her on a date, I did not have to lie and say it was fun because it had been, we drew and talked and I just had to kiss her like two times without having to feel guilty and uneasy, each time it was easier I thought, but that didn’t matter because it would be over pretty soon, after Christmas and new year’s eve we would be just a couple months away from graduating, so that kept me going.

Later at dinner time my dad he had some news to me, I was instantly nervous. I did want to go with Frank even if it was scary.

“So, I talked to the priest today. He did say he is getting Frank a car, he is not aware of the amount of money that his grandmother gave him, but we agreed that in case of an emergency, we will give you a small amount to come back safe and sound.” I nodded during the whole time.

“So, is that a yes?” My dad grinned and nodded, I almost yelped but I managed to avoid that emembarecing sound “But, you’ll have to answer every single phone call, and be very careful. Of course you can’t drink and I do hope Frank doesn’t either.” I nodded again.

“Thank you so much!” I said excited and gave my dad and mom and quick hug then ran upstairs. I had some research to do. I knew we were defiantly going to the next level, so I had to know what that next level was. I turned on my laptop and immediately looked simply for the term ´gay sex’ after skipping a thousand porn sites I found the ones where I could pretty much get instructions and tips.

A good fifteen minutes later I knew that for oral sex you were not supposed to use teeth which I was not sure of how to accomplish that and still give my partner some friction and suction as the site suggested.

I then moved on to know the procedures of the actual sex, I was really scared of being “the bottom” since, well that specific pace in my body –just like in anyone else’s I guess- is not exactly clean, so most likely I was missing out on the pro tips. “Enema?” I read out loud that only part of the entire article, the name sounded familiar but I couldn’t remember what it was so I looked for an image. _Oh._ Alright so now I knew the most important step, now I just had to get one before our trip, after all I did not see myself…making love to Frank.

He was the one in control every single time so I had to be ready. I also noticed that there’s some kind of preparation so you don’t feel pain, which was also a relief because I had no idea how can ah…penis go in such a small place. When I thought I had enough information I went to bed and tried to picture what it would be like. What if I did not like the feeling? What if it hurt too much for me to enjoy? I’d have to ask him to stop and he’d think I’m lame, or the worst case scenario would be where I did not follow the preparation procedure and so he ends up thinking I’m gross? Gosh I had to stop before having a panic attack. Of course we would not just go at it, we would have to talk about the whole situation, besides he loves me. I decided to go to sleep hugging my pillow which was incredibly reassuring.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Everyone, I'm really sorry for the delay, I've had just enough time to sleep but not to write or do anything creative so I'll be uploading again until my next day off, thanks to everyone who stayed tuned, I have not forgot about you or the fic, I'm still writing when I can


	30. Chapter 30

Chapter 30

So the date finally arrived, Frank and I went to school all very excited but nervous as well. We walked home with Mikey and by the time we walked over to the Iero’s house we spotted a brand new car parked outside the household. His parents were standing by it, I got excited when Frank lost all track of time and space. He took off his backpack and stared at the car. “Man…can you hold this?” He asked and I just took it while grinning without having him notice, he ran over there and hugged his parents, they all seemed very excited. Mikey and I approached them quickly, once we greed them we turned to the car, it was nothing like what your first car would look like, it seemed like they refused to get both something used and old, which was great, we did not want to get stuck in the highway because the car broke down.

“Thank you so, so much!” He said absent minded as he looked around the entire thing and his dad followed telling him all about it. We just looked at it while his mom talked to us. “I made some food and of course a cake, so I’ll call your mom to ask her to come over, I’m guessing you have your stuff packed so as soon as we finish you kidos can leave.” I nodded happily, I loved how supportive and fun our parents were. The day before I got a backpack ready with some new clean clothes, and pajamas just in case it got cold, also some condoms which I was really embraced to but among with an enema –which I already used— at the local pharmacy.

My mom did arrive a couple minutes later and gave my boyfriend a hug and went inside the house talking to Frank’s mother. They seemed to like each other already which was great. We sat down and ate together, we allowed the adults to talk and stuff and Mikey actually was the first one to start the conversation between us teens, he asked about the concert we were going to, we let him know it was Blink-182 one of Franks favorites, and he totally freaked out, I felt bad for not being able to take him but I did want some privacy with Frank after all so I promised I’d take him sometime later. When the time of cutting the cake came around, Linda lighted up the eighteen candles then Frankie seemed to think for a moment about his wish and turned to me smiling before blowing them. I blushed and hugged him wishing him a happy birthday which I had not done until now, and then Mikey did so as well I was so glad my brother and him liked each other and shared interests. After a while, it was time to go and so my mom got nervous as soon as Frank came downstairs with his backpack.

“I’m nervous but I’m also excited for you two. Have fun, but please be very very careful with anything, don’t go into the mosh pit thing, lock the car when you go into the hotel, lock the door as well. If you did not ask for room service and someone’s knocking, do not open the door.” She continued her rambling for a couple second before I hugged her goodbye, she giggled and hugged me back.

“I’ll see you in two days mom.” She nodded and they all walked us out, Frank got inside first to heat the car up, and I followed him. My mom had already bought my backpack so we were ready. He seemed to start familiarizing with the steering wheel and everything else.

“You ready?” I nodded with a tiny smile, I was very confident until my mom got me anxious.

“Yeah, let’s go.” He giggled and started driving away, I waved at our families and then turned to Frank. “Do, do we have a playlist for this trip?” He handed me his phone I plugged it in.

“You know it. It’s called GandF couldn’t come up with a better name.” He shrugged shamelessly. I just chuckled and played it. In the very first red light he leaned in to kiss my lips. “I wanted to do that since you wished me a happy birthday.” I blushed and nodded but couldn’t help myself from kissing him again. He grinned and turned his sight back to the row then started driving again in the green light we went back and forth like that until it was getting dark. “So are we stopping soon or do you want to get closer?” He sighed and shrugged.

“I dunno, I’ve always kinda wanted to sleep in the car you know?” He giggled. “Don’t worry, we do have money for one hotel night, and the other one is booked already.” I nodded, that sounded fun but also a little scary, what if someone tried to rob our stuff or even the car?

“Are you sure that’s safe? Like where can we do it?” He just smirked for a moment “What? Have you done it before?” He just shook his head.

“Kinda, I guess but yeah I know just where to do it. Don’t worry.” He said and I just stayed silent, this was all very excited but you still have to keep in mind that I was just anticipating the inevitable. “Aren’t you hungry?” He asked once were near by a dinner.

“Yeah, I mean we did eat a lot back home but I could have dinner by now.”

“Well good, cuz this is my favorite dinner ever. You’ll love it.”


	31. Chapter 31

 

Chapter 31

I was so happy that he was willing to show me all his favorite places, I was the one who he wanted to show around. No one else. That felt great say at least. We got inside of the dinner which looked like the ones on every 50’s movie. Frank sat down in front of me in the table and started telling me his favorite plates in case I did not know what I wanted. I ended up getting a plain hamburger with fries and a strawberry milkshake. And he just got some pancakes to avoid meat even though he mentioned that he just to come here as a kid with his parents and order just whatever aka something with meat in it.

“I’m gonna ask Linda to show me some pictures of you as a kid. Like, I can almost picture you, all energetic and mischievous but I just need to see it for real.” He laughed and pretended to get offended.

“The energetic part is fine, thank you. But mischievous?!” We laughed together.

“Come on! You’re always smirking and yeah…” I blushed, he looked at me with a crooked eyebrow.

“Are you complaining?” I immediately shook my head and smiled.

“Let’s just eat Frankie.” I said giggling. After about an hour we went back to the car. “So where are you taking me?” He sighed and leaned back in his seat.

“I’m rethinking about sleeping in the car, I mean what kind of boyfriend would I be if make you sleep all uncomfortable here just because I want to?” He shrugged and then I did too which made us giggle.

“I mean, I’m fine with it. Is not like this car is small or anything and if you know where we can sleep in without getting in trouble then I’m fine with it. It’s your birthday after all.” He leaned in to peck my lips and stayed really close looking into my eyes once he stopped kissing me. Gosh, I loved having him this close.

“You are the best boyfriend ever.” He said and gave me a quick hug. Once we stopped being cheesy he started driving, we entered in the parking lot of what seemed like grocery store that was pretty much empty. “Okay, so there might be some employees coming out in a few minutes from their shift, but they hate their jobs so they don’t care enough to tell on us.” He explained. “But just to be safe let’s get comfortable once they’re gone.” I nodded and took my backpack from the backseat to get some water, we were talking about the gig until there was a short guy that from far away looked just like Frank walking past the car. Frank opened the door and smirking said “Hey asshole.” The guy turned towards us surprised but ready to punch someone, I was so worried and just as confused until his expression changed and turned into a grin

“You motherfucker! What are you doing here? And on your birthday?” Okay, so they were friends. I sighed in relief and tried to look casual. Fran got out of the car and hugged him.

“I’m seeing Blink 182 tomorrow night so I came here with my boyfriend.” He pointed inside, the guy took a look and waved at me, I did the same with a smile and then just didn’t know what to do so I checked my phone.

“Damn, he’s handsome Frank.” The other guy said, I blushed but did not look up, they both giggled and did some small talk, Frank mentioned sleeping in the parking lot, the guy seemed totally cool with it so I thought I was just making a big deal out it. A couple minutes later he went away and Frank came back inside after reclining his seat all the way back. “Were ready to have a sleep over.” He giggled and got his backpack. He did have a blanket and a small pillow.

“You actually had this planned.” He shook his head fast.

“No! I swear, I just don’t like using some of the hotel stuff.” He shrugged, I kinda believed him and decided to get comfortable

“Can you help me get my seat like that? I don’t know how to do it. “ He nodded and came closer then placed his hands between my legs to reach down my seat and pull a latter, then the seat was completely back, Frank actually got on top of me which unlike other occasions got me nervous. “What are you doing?”

 


	32. Chapter 32

Chapter 32

“Nothing.” He smirked and started rubbing my thighs while he was still leaned down over my lower middle. Of course I knew what he was doing I was just surprised, I was expecting for him to “make a move” until the next night.

He came back up and kissed me deeply while he made me go to the back until I was now leaning into the backseat. I was trying to kiss him as deep and intensely as he was doing it but I was so nervous, he seemed to notice it then pulled away and looked directly into my eyes. I was already blushing and ready to apologize, I had to be ready, what was wrong with me?

“Are you okay? Was wrong?” He asked worriedly, I had to close my eyes and sigh. I threw my head back into the seat, I was taking the courage to speak.

“Nothing’s wrong I guess, I just…I’m nervous. I mean, tomorrow night were…you know, or maybe you wanna do it right now and I’m just panicking because, I dunno I pictured it very differently.” Frank smiled and shook his head, I felt so stupid. He was laughing at me?

“Baby…I’m not going to make you lose your virginity in a car.” He giggled. “Don’t freak out, I was just trying to do…you know the usual. But If you’re that nervous then we can’t stop.” He assured with a smile and a peck on my lips.

“I’m sorry, is just that…you know you’ve been my first everything and I guess since we never really talked about this I’m just nervous.” He nodded and sat down next to me.

“We can talk this out, I didn’t thought it would make you relax, but if it does than that’s great.” He said sincerely, I was slowly calming down so I decided to leave this topic for tomorrow.

“I guess we can discuss this tomorrow.” I finally smiled and leaned in to kiss him and cup his cheek. He pulled away after a little.

“Are you sure Gee?” I nodded and went back to the making out. After a few minutes we both seemed to forget about the topic and my mind just got empty as Frank started caressing my chest and legs over my clothing, I was kind of excited we were alone and that we could be a little louder. Frank pulled away and took his shirt off.

“It’s getting hot in here.” He smiled and pulled down one of the back windows  then went back at me. I was of course tempted to kiss and touch his chest, so that’s what I did, I went for his neck first. He hummed and seemed to really enjoy the attention I was providing him, I continued kissing the sensitive spots on his neck and even nibbling on it which I had never tried but I did enjoyed the response from Frank, tiny little moans that were music to my ears.

He just pushed me away a little to take off my shirt as well and then undo my pants and I could tell he was really desperate, I then hurried to get his pants off, we were struggling to do so since we had very little space. Once we were both in our boxers, he smirked pleased and sat down next to me then tried to pull down my briefs which I totally allowed him to, he caressed my inner thighs and cupped his hand to give me some friction which made me gasp in surprise, he smirked and started jerking me off, I spread my legs open and reached out to touch him as well, but he stopped and said “Let me sit behind you.” I nodded and gave him enough space to do so. Once he was behind me, he took me by the shoulders and made me lean back into him, I could feel his chest and boner against my back, when he had me where he wanted me, he took his hands to my inner thighs and caressed them just to tease me, I was already painfully hard so I was not appreciating that at all, he seemed to notice that due to my whimpers and proceed to -at least- cup my balls in his hand and toy them around a little. “I want you to be as loud as you want tonight.” I nodded fast.

“Give me something to be loud.” I said breathlessly, he hummed.

“Don’t push it.” He said trying to sound bossy. I just smiled and let it go to have some action going. I moaned when he started working his hand up and down my length, I was moaning and leaning back into him, I threw my arm back and reached for the back of his head, I could feel his breath over my left cheek, he was moaning because I knew my body was giving him some friction as well. When he kept moving his hand I decided to start bucking my hips and I was already close to the climax, he was doing everything he knew I liked, he was working me really fast, playing with the end of it with his thumb from time to time, the car was full with our moans and whimpers and attempts of words. After a couple of minutes, while bucking my hips messily I spilled over Frank’s fist, then tried to get my breath back and focused on getting Frank off by sitting down next to him and jerking him off quickly, I knew he was close anyways. “So good Gee…mhh.” He moaned and threw his head back over the seat. I moved my hand as fast as I could and pretty much repeated the actions he would have applied on me until he tensed his whole body and then relaxed coming with a delicious moan. When he was ready to come down from his high we cleaned ourselves and put our clothes on since it was getting rather fresh outside. When I saw frank laying down and taking the pillow and blanket my heart just fluttered.

“I guess I’ll have to use you as a pillow.” He nodded sleepily and opened his arms wide enough for me to fit between them and rest my head on his chest. “Goodnight.” I whispered snuggling with him, this situation was a lot more comfortable then what I thought.

“Goodnight Gee. Sleep tight.”

 

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I know no one's reading anymore but i can't leave this unfinished so, I'll upload until the end, no epilogue. I'm not putting into that much effort anymore due to school and work so I don't see the point on making this even longer


	33. Chapter 33

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Gee is losing his virginity in the next chapter!!! omg
> 
> thank you for everyone letting me know that you are still reading. love you <3

Chapter 33

We spend a couple of hours there just laughing and talking after a while I decided to draw which left Frank to remember old times, but not better times according to him.

When it was time to get going we climbed on the car and played some blink-182 songs to get in the mood. Frank was nodding his head among the beat and I was now singing to the lyrics. I was so excited for tonight but yet kind of nervous as well.

When we arrived there there was already a line forming outside the venue, I could already tell we were going to be near the stage, and I didn’t care for the fact we were gonna have to wait in line for a good couple of hours. Meanwhile we waited Frank and I talked about silly things, I grabbed his hand and fidgeted his fingers in boredom, I took a closer look at his tattoos which he noticed.

“Would you ever get a tattoo?” He asked randomly.

“No, I’m really afraid of needles, so that would be a extremely masochism thing to do.” I responded running my thumb over the revenge one on his wrist and felt how his skin was uneven due to the ink. I couldn’t wait to get my hands on the other different tattoos that he had all over his body, the two peagons right above his pelvis area? Gosh I was trying so hard not to get aroused before time.

The gates opened twenty minutes late which was fine because as soon as we got in, we ran to the edge of the stage and held onto our spots with our lives even when the other people that got in after us wanted to get in the way, I was all pushed up again the stage, and Frank had his arms around me to protect me from people pushing me or stabbing me with their elbows.

I avoided looking around to get anxious due to all of the people inside this small venue and just focused on Frank’s warmth and arms around me and I felt safe all of the sudden. My feet were already sore by the time the that the introducing band came out, and I was also very sweaty, I had to do a mental reminder of taking a shower as soon as we got back. I got very excited and forgot about everything as soon as the lights went off and everything went silent, a few moments later I saw Travis, Mark and Tom come out, they were so close to us that I couldn’t help actually squealing. I felt Frank hold me tighter in excitement. We all screamed as soon as Tom started talking to the audience and soon enough they started playing our favorite songs. The excitement and good music brought the head banging into Frank which felt funny on my neck since we were really close and I couldn’t move and help but feel the wind he was blowing over the back of my neck.

The night was coming to an end and I was partially relived since I was really tired from just standing there the whole time in a very hot closed space. I dedicated to take some pictures and a couple of selfies to remember this and sang along to the last song of the playlist looking forward to go to the hotel room with Frank.

We waited a couple of minutes to have the people spread out and give us enough space to walk out. When we got to the hotel I noticed it was quite nice, Frank’s parents had spent a little too much money on us if you asked me. We got inside as we rode the elevator I couldn’t help but thinking ‘this is it, it’s gonna happen’ Frank glanced at me with a smile I just grinned and reached out for his hand. “I think I’m gonna shower real quick.” He nodded and let me out as soon as the elevator doors opened up.

“Sure, I think I’ll do it…later.” I blushed but tried to hide it by heading to the bathroom. Once inside I took my clothes off and looked at myself in the mirror sighing. Will he even like me? I was so insecure right now, even though I had never really been self conscious.

I took a quick shower making sure that I was really clean, nice smelling and ready to go. I put on some boxers and shirt kind of to look like I was ready to sleep if that was the case but I did not have a full on pajama so he wouldn’t think i was turning him down.

I sighed yet again and opened the bathroom door then walked into the room trying to look casual. Frank was sitting in the bed without his vans or shirt on and just watching tv. Maybe he was nervous too? Gosh how would this even work?

“Wanna come here? I’m lonely” He smiled at me, I just nodded and walked towards his side of the bed so I could straddle him, he immediately gripped my hips and looked up at me with a genuine smile which I returned as I calmed the fuck down. “So, you wanna talk about it?” I knew what he meant so I sighed and nodded then hide my face in his shoulder to feel reassured and have actual words come out of my mouth. “Okay, so you know you can ask me to stop whenever and we can only do it if you are a hundred percent sure that you want this.” I nodded and pulled away to look into his eyes.

“I am sure, I’m just nervous but I’ve been waiting for this a long time.” I empathized the last part to which he agreed with a nod.


	34. Chapter 34

“Okay then...Again just tell me to stop and I’ll do it.” I nodded eagerly and practically smashed our lips together in a passionate kiss, he seemed to smile into it and according to all the porn I watched in order to be ready for this, that was not supposed to happen, so I tried to do just whatever we always did which was pretty much have our hands all over the place, I started by lowering my hands to his back and reach for the hem of his pants afterwards. He pulled away to breath in and leaned back so I got to see his doves tattoo, I automatically placed my fingers over it as Frank kissed my neck wetly, I started working on his pink belt and undid it easily which seemed to please him. I then struggled to lower his pants a little and get a hold of his still fabric-covered cock. Everything was going fast and burly but it did feel nice, maybe this would be our type of love making, if you will.

I then proceed to lean back and get him completely naked, I was already visibly hard in my under ware. “Hey it’s not fair.” He seemed comfortable with his own body which was extremely hot for me. I just nodded like an idiot and took my shirt off, he ran his hand heavily over my bare skin, as he watched my torso like it was the most interesting and delightful thing on earth. He realized he had dozed out and smiled up at me then took care of lowering my boxers “Gosh, you’re so beautiful.”  I blushed and just struggled to get them off since I had no space to do so, I felt like an inexperienced fool, which I was in fact. But he made me forget all of that as soon as he got on top of me with one arm next to my head, I looked up at him with a shy smile but my face changed as soon as he touched my tights and up to my chest, every single touch he was giving me felt so unique and just _good_. I couldn’t imagine something feeling better than Frankie’s touch.

I had already of course felt his bare touch on me but now we weren’t in the dark or on a hurry which was great. He kissed my neck and went over to my lips as he hummed “I’m gonna try something new okay?” I nodded in expectation, he made his way down to my chest, I folded my arm below my head so I could see him easily, I kinda knew where this was going so I wanted to be able to remember every single detail of the first time. He was really focused on covering every single spot of skin with his lips, he then moved to one of my nipples, at first it felt funny but then I allowed myself to gasp as I felt pleasure from it. When he pulled away he nuzzled my lower stomach with his cheeks and nose, he seemed to inhale my scent which would’ve been strange if I didn’t feel the need to do the same each time we were together.

He started spreading kisses all over my pelvic area, I almost couldn’t stay still but he helped by holding me down by my thighs. He then left an almost innocent kiss on the tip of my dick, I could already tell that was going to feel better than his hand. He finally did it, he sucked the head very eagerly which made me gasp and buck my hips up a little even when Frank was trying really hard to keep me still. All I could do was feel how he hollowed his incredibly wet and hot mouth around my shaft.

He went down to the base and stayed like that for a couple of seconds most likely trying to torture me. I sighed trying to calm down and just enjoy, is not like I wasn’t enjoying my first blowjob but again, it was my first so I was trying really hard not to come too fast.

He pulled away just to ask “You liking it Gee?” and went back down.  I nodded with my eyes shut close, probably looked like I was getting killed but I was in a lot of pleasure. He started bobbing his head after a couple of second of him just laughing at me I guess. I couldn’t believe how good it felt and how close I was to cum in his mouth so I decided to warn him.

“Frankie…I-I’m gonna…” He choose to ignore me and went even harder on me, I could feel my orgasm building up until I was bucking into his mouth without me even knowing. I was moaning and whimpering when it finally hit me and I spurted inside his mouth, I couldn’t really open my eyes until a few seconds later, I looked at him and he was just swallowing my entire load without any sign of disgust, I gasped for air and prompted myself up.

“You’re so beautiful baby” He said pinning me down yet again to kiss me passionately, I tangled my fingers in his hair, I needed him to continue and make me feel good. Even though I had just cum I was pretty sure I could get going again. “Are you ready now?” I nodded and spread my legs open for him, I threw my arm over my eyes so I could relax and just enjoy even though I knew it was going to hurt. I heard Frank moving around getting the stuff he was going to need. When he was ready he caressed my knee and rubbed two fingers against my entrance, I could tell he got lube so he coat me first then I felt the first finger slip inside of me, I couldn’t help but cringe and jump a little at the surprise and tried to stay still as my body got used to it “Want me to stop?” I shook my head.

“Just…I’ll get used to it.” He kissed the hand over my face, I smiled and moved it away, then he instead kissed my forehead and really just make me feel at ease. He wiggled his finger inside me and it took a small moan away from me, when he could tell I was ready, he got the second finger inside of me. I could tell he was really taking his time to take care of me, and make it hurt as less as it could and just make me feel loved, which I did, even though we had never said so.

When I was ready and the sensation was just uncomfortable instead of painful, he got between my legs, he caressed them and made me wrap my legs around his waist “Okay, I’m gonna do it now Gee.” I nodded and just let him do it. He slipped inside of me, I instantly gasped in a little bit of pain and just bit my bottom lip trying to control myself. Frank gaped as soon as he felt me around him, I looked up at him and noticed he had his eyes closed, he was all flushed and _just beautiful._ “You can move” I let him know even though I felt still really weird. He bucked his hips once and just moaned lowly, I sighed and braced myself for the sensation. After a couple of minutes it was okay, I was actually getting turned on by just seeing and _feeling_ Frank, I was getting hard already by just watching Franks expressions, I was so pleased to know he was enjoying this, It wasn’t like I was having a bad time but I knew that at least the first time I wouldn’t feel that great.

He seemed to want to please me as much as I was pleasing him so he took his fist to my boner and started stroking me fast as he pounded into me. I was now moaning and crying out beneath him, he seemed to like that so he reached down to bit my bottom lip and then my neck as he looked down at his movements resting his head on my chest, he kept his rhythmic and delicious movements until he came inside of me with no warning, but the hot feeling and slow grinding movements Frank was making against me was sensual enough to get me off and make me cum over his fist.

He pulled away once we both had come down of our high, Frank got some baby wipes he had prepared and cleaned both of us. He laid down next to me and breathed in like he just had come back from running or doing his training, I was just tired and sweaty but really, really happy. The one thing I had already dreamed of before I even thought of dating Frank had just happened and it had been really cute, he had cared for me the entire time in different ways and I just felt so good. He held me in his arms while he calmed down, I kissed his jaw and giggled as his breathing started to normalize. “You okay?” He giggled too and nodded.

“Yeah, it had just been a while.” He said. “How are you feeling?” I sighed and just smiled.

“I’m fine. It does hurt, but I’ll be okay. I’m just really happy right now.” I shrugged and covered our bodies with the blanket Frank had bought in his bag. “I…I could even say that…” He was looking right into my eyes, he was expecting for me to say it, but what if it was too soon? Or he didn’t feel the same just yet? I didn’t want to rush him or ruin this perfect moment. “Never mind.”

“Say it Gee, please.” He smiled and held me even tighter in his built arms. I shook my head still oh so insecure of myself. “Fine then, I’ll say it.” He took in a deep breath and got a big smile on his face. “I really need to pee.” Before I even had time to gasp and cry he giggled “I’m just kidding…I love you Gerard.” His look got a little bit more serious “I really do.” I smiled wide and kissed his cheek.

“I love you too Frankie.” I said lowly, I was so excited but nervous even though he did feel the same way. I felt so stupid but I couldn’t help my shy self. “Now what?” I giggled.

“Now we could take a shower so we can sleep fondly” he stood up and stretched out, again he was really, really comfortable being naked at least about me, something I’d have to get used to. I somehow managed to stand up and follow him to the bathroom without covering myself or blushing…too much.

We hit the shower and relaxed under the hot water, with the winter just around the corner, we had totally dismissed a cold water shower. Frank pulled me close and held me; I had to close my eyes due to the water but still enjoyed him holding me. He then proceeded to wash my hair and body. When we were done, Frank got me a clean t shirt that surprisingly fit me longer than my usual shirts did and we laid back down in the bed after fixing the sheets and all that. Frank turned off the lap and checked his phone just to let know his mom we were fine and about to sleep, probably my mom would be mad that I did not texted her before sleeping but I was really tired. Even if we were in the dark, once he had placed his phone away I could still feel he was looking at me, I turned to him and searched for his lips. I kissed them sweetly, his breath was warm and his hands were playing with my hair gently. “Goodnight Gee.”

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> There you have it; shitty smut lol 
> 
> Thank you for everyone who commented and read the last chapter, I really hope you enjoy this :)
> 
> Pikaxu13 : I'm really happy to read that *-* xo
> 
> Blurry_desolation: Thank you for letting me know, I know its obnoxious I just need reassurement lol xo
> 
> HesitantAlienKat: Thank you! It means a lot :3 xo
> 
> Caxmensa: I will keep in mind the green day au even though I had thought about doing a Phan fic, you know Dan and Phil? but I don't know, I mean they are british it would be too difficult for me to pull it off haha, I'm really happy to know that you read this thing in two days, that's impressive! haha xoxo


	35. Chapter 35

Chapter 35

Months later

I was sitting in Frank’s living room just waiting for him to bring some popcorn while I watched a Kubrick’s movie. He came back running and falling on his ass over the couch. I laughed and grabbed some popcorn and focused again on the screen until Frank talked to me. “So, about the moving out thing.” My heart dropped, as any other anxious person does, my first thought had to be bad. That was it, he did not want to move in with me anymore, maybe even break up with me. “We should go check out some places this week.” I sighed in relief and felt stupid instantly.

“I really thought you wanted to call it quits on that.” I laughed nervously, he just snorted.

“Are you kidding me? This is probably the most exciting thing that’s ever happened to me.” He hugged me while eating a mouthful of popcorn, I leaned into his touch and relaxed.

“Alright then, let’s go tomorrow. No big deal right?” He hummed and nodded.

“Yeah, we can drive there after school.” I smiled feeling relived and paid attention to Dr. Strangelove for a little bit until I had a question.

“Have you talked about it with your parents?” He turned to me and nodded.

“Yeah, just like Donna and don, they’re worried and don’t think I have the need to get a job, but they are happy to hear that ‘I’d like to get work experience’ like they said, they just want to know what kind of job I got so they can tell me to quit it right away I guess.” I giggled at the last bit and nodded. We had already come to the agreement that my parents would sent me money for food expenses and a part of collage (since it’s really expensive and I could not afford it with my own salary) and I would get some customer service job or whatever, of course it would be a part time schedule, but Frank on the other hand would work a full shift in order to afford the apartment and other stuff.

The next day I told Mikey I was not going home right away and to please tell my mom I was out with Frank. We jumped in the car and soon we were on our way to New York, it was about an hour away so we decided to play a brand new playlist I had made for us. “So how are we going to find these rent places?” I turned the stereo down just a little.

“Oh, I made my research, of course the focal point is collage, so we can park there, see your new school first and then meet with the owners of the places and get some food” I nodded but tensed up instantly at the thought of going to school, I knew I was going to be really anxious while going to college, I just knew, so going unexpectedly there was a lot of pressure.

I could tell we got somewhere near the school buildings when I noticed the traffic. When we figured out the parking situation we walked by the New York Visual Art School that I was supposed to go to, Frank opened up the wooden door for me but I just started at it and refused to walk in which made him turn around and give me a confused look  “What’s wrong?” I shook my head and just stayed silence, he slowly let go of the door and looked at me “Baby? What-” He hugged quickly and that made me break, I couldn’t believe I was about to have an anxiety attack by just _entering a building._ “You got nervous?” I just nodded as I tried to fight my tears back. “Its okay baby, we don’t have to go in. You can come by yourself or with me whenever you’re ready, we can even tell your mom, dad and Mikey to come with us. Let’s get some food, how does that sound?” I pulled away so I could breathe and calm down. He smiled and wiped away my tears with his thumbs, I giggled at the thought of how cheesy he could be sometimes, but stuff like this made me love him after all.

We walked down the same block until we found a pizza place. We stepped inside, Frank asked me to grab a table while he ordered our meal, by now he knew my favorite type of pizza and soda so I was free to just wait. I looked out the window and just watched the people walking by, everyone seemed very busy and in a hurry to even mind their surroundings and people around them, so maybe I shouldn’t be anxious about what people thought of me at school. Maybe they wouldn’t even notice me and I could just be ignored for a couple more years just like I had done through high school.

Frank surprised me by coming back with our food quite fast. He was smiling at me but knew something was off maybe. “Ready for some New York pizza?” I nodded and smiled at him, I felt a little bit better now, I was going to focus on having a good time with Frank, and get excited about all of this changes and new experiences instead of having panic attacks about moving in with my gay boyfriend who happened to be the best person in the entire human history.

I could tell Frank was holding himself back from being romantic probably so I could be calm and just eat, but that made me feel a little bad so as soon as we got out of the pizza place I held his hand…in public…with people passing by us…some of them kind of seeing us…and I did not die. Maybe I could get used to living here and just embrace my sexuality and get out of the “closet” as people called it.

So after walking a couple blocks we got to the first place, the person that was going to show it to us was already there, but seemed to be in a hurry, Frank did not tell me anything about the price so I focused on seeing if the place was good enough for us. Truth be told, the place was shitty as fuck, I couldn’t wait to get out of it due to the smell, it was tiny and we could tell there was a lot of rats and cockroaches leaving there which was disgusting, so we got out of it alive in a couple of minutes. Then we walked to the second appointment in a different building, this time it was an apartment way closer to collage which would save a lot of time and money for us, and it was actually kinda cute, I could see myself living there, but it was just too expensive, or at least Frank told me so once we got out it.

I started to get disappointed at the whole situation since we saw three more places during the entire day and none of them were good enough for us, so we had to return to Jersey with no good news for our parents or ourselves. Since I was kinda sad and getting all sensitive due to the changes we were soon going to be trough, I needed a night of acknowledgment with Frank (besides who wouldn’t want to be with Frankie just talking and kissing?) I gave my mom a call and let her know how shitty the day had been, finding an apartment wise, she told me to forget about it all and just rest and relax with Frank. She wished us a goodnight to both of us and hung up.

I sighed right after and laid down in Franks bed, I allowed the scent in Franks pillows to calm me down while the actual Frankie came back from the kitchen. I heard him humming and coming in, I looked up and noticed he grabbed two sodas for us, I sat down and smiled at him. “You told your mom already?” I nodded and took the can from his hand to take small sips before lying back down. “You okay? I know today didn’t go well, but it was just our first day, it might take us a couple more but that’s nothing to be sad about. We’ll find it. Trust me.” I smiled at him and nodded, he always made me see the rational side of things.

“Thank you, I was kind of upset about it.” He just giggled.

“I could tell, how about we relax and just go to sleep?” I nodded and made some space for him, I was so ready to just get my mind off of things.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I thought there was going to be more comments bc of the smut lol it was my first one, so sorry if it was shitty


	36. Chapter 36

Chapter 36

Just as usual we ended up watching a 50’s series while we cuddled. Frank was currently caressing my arms and side, he was pretty much tickling me on propose, he suddenly stopped touching me and turned to me. “Hey…mind if I ask you something?” I nodded and just waited for the words to come out instead of freaking out. “What’s going on with Lindsey? Like…you’re gonna break up with her soon?” Until then, I actually had permission to freak out. I had no answer to that, I hadn’t really thought about it but, what if he got upset and we had our second fight right now?

“Well, you know…it shouldn’t be that hard for me to do it, we haven’t seen each other in weeks, I think that even Mr. Gallagher started to notice that, so imagine Lindsey herself. I can tell her soon, like…I’ll use the excuse of me going away.” I rambled nervously while Frank wouldn’t take his eyes off of me.

“Gee, I just asked for a yes or a no.” I sighed and nodded fast.

“Well, yes. I will…soon.” He crooked an eyebrow and turned to the TV clearly letting me know he was upset. I huffed and opened my mouth to try to defend myself. He seemed to noticed but gave more attention to the screen than me. “Please Frank don’t be mad.”

“I’m not.” He said simply, like my dad said my girlfriend would do whenever she was in fact, upset.

“Yes you are. You clearly are upset Frank, and I really don’t understand why, you know she is someone who was close to me when we were little but you are the most important person to me right now, and will be from now on, so there’s no need for you to get all weird about it.” He sighed and looked down at his lap.

“Sorry.” He mumbled in a defensive tone and lay down with his back facing me. I rolled my eyes, why couldn’t he just tell me what was exactly wrong with it? Or just accept the fact I would break up with her, when I was ready for it.

 I decided to watch some youtube videos to get my mind off of things, I felt too tired to even keep talking about this with Frank. Maybe this wasn’t a good sign, but what kind of couple does not fight from time to time? Right?

After a couple hours I got sleepy, I lay down and stared at Frank’s back, he was so beautiful and I was so lucky to have him. He should know by now there was no reason for him to ever feel jealousy. I wrapped my arm around his middle, he was already asleep so he leaned back into me and just sighed. I got to fall asleep after a while but had a terrible nightmare of me arguing with Frank.

I woke up barely being able to breathe; Frank was wrapping his arms around me. “Calm down Gee, its okay. I’m here.” He whispered and rocked me gently. I tried to ease the peace of my breath and leaned into his touch, I needed to feel him and know he was still there.

“You wanted to-to break up with me and-and…” I tried to breathe normally and not look like a stupid hipper anxious kid. He shook his head and leaned down to kiss my forehead.

“That will never happen. Shh.” He tried to calm me down and I just closed my eyes trying to concentrate on his voice. “You have to stop thinking that.”

“I´m just scared…I’ve come to term with my sexuality, at least that’s-that’s what I like to think, but if you leave me…I just could never fall in love with another guy.” I felt the corners of his mouth go up against my forehead.

“You don’t have to worry about finding another guy or anything because I’m not going anywhere. I love you, remember?” I nodded and sighed feeling relieved at his words.

“I love you too Frankie.” I placed a kiss over his clothed chest.

“I’m sorry about being pushy earlier.” I shook my head fast, the last thing I wanted was for him to feel bad for my decisions and indecision of just actually just breaking up with a girl I didn’t love. “You can just use the excuse of going away like you said. I mean, I’m aware that you can’t come out of the closet at least here, I don’t want your parents to have a hard time in the community, we had already talked about this and believe me, I do understand. So it’s okay. Let’s do what’s best for everyone, we’re still gonna be together and I’m just happy for that.”

“Thank you for understanding Frankie.” I pecked his lips and leaned into his touch.

“Let’s just rest baby.” He giggled and lay back down with me resting over his chest. I felt so warm and protected now. I knew it was going to be okay, we always figured things out in the end, even though I was young I knew I was learning a lot about relationships and how to manage having one as a secret.

                    

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I did not even checked this before posting. oops


	37. Chapter 37

 

Chapter 37

Two weeks had passed since those bloom, overwhelming days. A lot has happened since then, we are about to sign the contract to the land lord of our place, our actual apartment and I just got accepted into collage, that was actually   an ego booster and just one of the best news ever.

I had finished packing all the stuff I didn’t need use daily at my parents but that certainly I would need in NY, as to the domestic stuff, we were supposed to get them all at like a 99 cent store. Right now we were on the way to our place, my mom was driving us there, and she had not seen the place or anything, we had her sign the contract for us since, yeah people out there won’t rent an apartment to kids that easily.

My mom actually liked the place and was just walking around checking everything while Frank and I made a ´to get´ list since we were going shopping. The only things we actually needed to get later (once the graduation actually happened) were a fridge and a bed box and some sheets.

“Are you ready boys?” She came back from the tiny balcony we had (yeah, we even got that) Frank nodded and got close to her, he gave her a quick hug and just grinned. I could tell he was really excited, and that just made me feel warm inside.

We headed to the store and by the time we got back we had too many bags to take upstairs to _our home_ so we had to do a couple trips up and down. Once we were done, we started getting things in place and until then it started looking like a home, like someone lived there and had an okay style. This was just awesome, the superficial side of this experience was really fun.

When we were done, my mom took us back to our town, I helped Frankie with some of his stuff and figured we would have to leave some of our belongings at our rooms since we couldn’t really take everything back to New York due to the space situation, our apartment wasn’t particularly small, but there was a certain size to every loft or apartment over there, so we were gonna have to work it out.

By the time we had a pretty big part of Franks closet packed in backpacks and just a couple suitcases I plumped down over the bed exhausted from doing so much carrying. Frank looked at me with a smile and went over to straddle me. “You’re tired already? I had some plans for you.” I giggled and looked away blushing “Your parents might come back anytime.” I whispered, he shrugged and leaned down to kiss my lips and neck, I had found out that there was a certain spot in my neck that he liked and really enjoyed to lick and bit a lot. I discovered the pleasure in such a thing when I allowed myself to enjoy and brace myself for brand new stuff being done to my body by him every time we had intimacy.

He quickly had rid of my shirt and caressed my whole torso, I couldn’t help but lean into his touch and get chills from each action he made. I worked on his clothes too, he got me going so easily, I couldn’t wait to feel the warmth of his skin against mine and comfort me in every single way by just _touching._

He quickly started dry humping me, I had to gasp out for air and that was continued by a moan. “Come on Frankie, hurry up.” I whispered over his ear, he seemed to get chills and just smirked then hurried to get us both naked. When he did, he told me to get in four, I used his pillows as support for my hands and just waited for him to take care of me. At this point, he rarely prep me, which was fine I was more than used to this, he did like to tease me by caressing or fingering that part, because he liked to see me writhe and whine so much by just using his fingers, but hey you can’t blame me, he really knew what he was doing with just his fingers.

Right now he was just teasing my hole with his middle finger and getting it all the way in earning the first actual moan from me. I could feel his hot, heavy breath over my back, which meant he was too turned on to even breath properly, I loved those little moments where I could just appreciate how true his love and overall feelings were towards me, he just couldn’t hide them at moments like this.

When he decided to stop the torture (yes, I´m really exaggerated) He now teased the tip of his dick against the sensitive flesh then slowly filled me up to the rim. I was feeling so good by just feeling him inside, and him leaning over my back. When he got comfortable he stated moving and caressing my hips with his thumbs, he was also moaning and gasping. We were used to the noise of the creaking bed after a little, so Frank decided to speed his peace up even if the noise was almost too loud to concentrate. He was going pretty fast, in no time, he knew how I liked it the most, which was really exciting. “Harder Frankie.” I had to moan out when I felt like I actually needed more.

“Mhh, so hot Gee.” He whispered right next to my cheek. He was holding onto the headboard with one hand, and the other one was down holding me by my lower stomach giving my boner some friction. I knew he was not jerking me off on propose, he wanted me to last as long as my body could handle, but I think he was having a hard time with it himself. “You like that now?” He asked referring to him going harder and faster, I just managed to nod quickly and keep moaning.  I never wanted this to end but at the same time I couldn’t hold it anymore, he finally gave me a couple strokes and that was it for me.

I came in his first and over his godamn pillow, I felt him still going and it was kind of okay until I got oversensitive, luckily he finished inside the condom a couple seconds later, he was gasping and breathing next to my face until he came down from his high, I loved when I felt his hot breath over me, I still think that’s the hottest thing ever. I smiled and turned to him, he had his eyes closed but a genuinely smile on his face. “Gosh, that was so intense…at least for me.” I giggled and nodded “Same but hey…can you pull out? I’m kinda-“  He pulled away quickly and tossed the condom inside the trash bin next to his bed. “Sorry about that.” He chuckled and laid down next to me with his arm folded under his head and just looked at me. My arms had collapsed a couple minutes ago so I was now lying on my belly, with my bare ass in the air. “You’re so beautiful.” I blushed and hid my face in his chest.

“We should probably get dressed, we don’t want your mom seeing this.” I said to which he nodded. “How about, since were done packing, and we ate something earlier, we just get the covers over our dicks and sleep. If she comes in here, she’ll think we’re just shirtless.”

“Yeah because the night is so hot.” I giggled and sat down to get in the pajama set I had at his house and laid back down after going to the bathroom of course, he was already falling asleep, just naked and over the covers, I get why he got really tired, it had been a while since we were intimate, most likely due to my mood lately and all of the stuff we’ve had to take care of, but even as tired as I was now, that really liberated a lot of stress from me. I was ready to just sleep and cuddle Frankie, which I did as soon as I lay down in his warm small sized bed. For the first time in weeks I actually got to just rest and hold Frank and feel close to him and enjoy this…us.


	38. Chapter 38

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Sorry about last episode lol, I've been too busy and distracted so I made that embarrassing mistake. Lol here's the actual chapter, sorry about that again, and also this chapter being so short. Oh and sidenote the end is near!

Chapter 38

The graduation went down pretty quickly, it was both exciting and embarrassing, my mom wanted pictures with me wearing this blue robe every five minutes. And also Frank’s parents were way too excited as well, we had a meal with the two families I couldn’t really focus on the meal or having a conversation not even with Mikey, I was really anxious by just knowing what was coming up.

I was super excited but at the same time I was so nervous and sad of leaving my comfort zone and most importantly my family, my little brother, the one I always came for support. Who was I going to talk to and ask for advice whenever I fought Frank?, (which I really was hoping never happened) but if that ever happened I would have to most likely Uber all the way from our place to spend the night here, and honestly, coming back home under any situation aside from just visiting would feel like a failure, I wanted to have this experience to be the best. I wanted to be independent and responsible, and just learn a lot so my parents could be really proud of me. Of course this whole situation was caused by Frank and wanting to be together and just be at peace, the proud thing was just an extra, I also wanted to learn with Frank, I wanted to see how much improvement we could do on just basic home stuff. We would learn to cook together, to do laundry and other annoying stuff; and in a way I also wanted Frank to be proud of me.

When we finished eating, Frank remained talking to my mom planning on some of the stuff we still had to figure out before going and actually living there. I took that as a chance to have an actual goodbye with Mikey in the privacy of his room in case I cried, since I did not wanted everyone to see me in such an emotional state. I told him to help me with something upstairs, he followed me without hesitation I went in his room first and jut hugged him tightly. “I’m gonna miss you so much Mikey.” I said sadly.

“Me too but hey, you have to promise you’ll come each weekend.” I pulled away and smiled at him. “If I don’t have any project due Mondays, I will.” I assured him, that seemed to be enough for him and held me again.

“I know you and Frank will do great. You are perfect for each other.” And that’s when I broke down in tears, he was the perfect little brother, so supportive, even when that meant going against the stuff our parents and church had thought us.

“Thank you Mikes, it does mean a lot. And please remember, this has to be a secret still.” I felt him nod.

“Don’t you trust your little brother?” I giggled and pulled away again. “And, uh if he ever makes you sad or upset, come here right away. I don’t wanna know you had an anxiety attack while you were all alone.” I nodded this time and wiped away my tears. “I will come to you and bother you. Don’t you trust your big brother?” He rolled eyes at me. I smacked his shoulder and laughed. “Let’s go back” He nodded and followed me. Almost everyone was outside smoking and talking about good thing they had heard about my collage and the part of the city we were going to live in.

Meanwhile, Frank’s dad was in the kitchen drinking a cup of coffee, when he saw me walking around, he approached me with a big warm smile,’ I know where I have seen that smile before’ I thought to myself. “Hi Gerard, I wanted to have a word with you before you guys pick off.”


	39. Chapter 39

Chapter 39

“Of course Mr. Iero.” I finally said after I took a deep breath. He headed towards the window of the kitchen, I guess so he could see if anyone outside were coming back. So this was totally a private conversation? This just got even more serious. “By now Gerard, I’m sure you know that I appreciate you. You and Frank got very, very close in a short period of time which I’m really thankful for…but there’s something you should really know.” By now I was leaning against the counter because I was getting dizzy from so many thoughts.  He knew, he fucking knew but what was he going to say?

“I don’t appreciate lies…” He gave me an intense look and my heart fricking stopped. “I do appreciate you and I understand why you guys have been doing this, and I thought Frank trusted me enough to tell me, but I guess that’s something I should talk to him instead…you should know that even though I am the pastor at church, I accept your relationship with my son, your uh…romantic relationship.” He clarified. I lost it right there, he clearly knew but not just that, he accepted us? That was totally against the rules he preaches about in church.

“B-but how? I mean…” I sighed, I had so many questions for him but I was just shocked, that changed a lot of things, for better I believe but this was just so unexpected.

“How did I find out you mean?” He grinned “That wasn’t so hard to figure out, you guys sleep on the same bed all the time, we have caught you cuddling and uh…there was an uncomfortable situation with the neighbors telling me something about loud noises?” I had to cover my mouth from gasping, I was about to pass out.

“Oh my god. I’m so sorry and just…so, so embarrassed.”  He smiled and shook his head.

“If you’re sorry for being my son’s romantic partner, do not apologize about that…about the neighbors situation, that’s fine just try to be not that loud at New York, we don’t want you to get kicked out.” By now I was taking really deep breaths and trying to smile back at him, he was so relaxed about this whole situation that I just couldn’t believe it and be cool about it, he was even being funny. He was the best parent ever, I could officially tell now.

“I…I don’t know how to thank you enough, if you guys ever knew about this, I was sure that something horrible would have happened…I would’ve been just crushed if Frank was pretty much rejected by his family, so you don’t know how much this means to me. Thank you” I felt the strongest urge to go up to him and give him a hug. I felt so happy, I wondered if my parents could ever accept me, but that was a goal for later. So far I had accepted myself and Frank’s dad also did. That was good enough for now.

“Just one question…does Frank mom knows too?” I asked once I pulled away. He shook his head.

“The thing here is…I understand you guys, maybe if I wouldn’t have followed my families believes I would’ve lived a life just like yours.” Oh…so that made a lot more sense than just him being the coolest dad ever. I mean, he is though. “So this is a personal thing, I’m not accepting of you guys because our church is going that way, that being said, Frank’s mom believes that’s not what god wants for you, will she ever accept the situation? Maybe, she couldn’t just pretend her son does not exist. She’s not that kind of woman.” I nodded and sighed, I felt like we had hope and that some of the things I had wished for the last few months could someday happen.

“With all that being said. I support you and Frank, and I would like to be the one to talk to Frank about this” I nodded quickly.

“Of course, that’s your right Mr. Iero.” He smiled and tapped my shoulder affectingly. I heard Frank talking to his mom and coming back inside. We walked over to the living room, I felt so peaceful. We were about to leave and live our life together, and at least we had Frank’s dad approval and acknowledgment of our relationship.

The goodbyes and small talks went on for what seemed like forever, I was really enjoying hearing my family and Frank’s family encouraging words, because god knows we will need to keep those optimistic words in handy. Of course this experience was going to be really exciting but at the same time, we’re really young so this experience is not going to be easy, for none of us of course.

The sun was setting by the time we got in the car, Frank drove off rather quickly, I just looked back and noticed our mom’s were crying, and Frank’s dad seemed very touched, he even had to turn around so his tears wouldn’t be noticed by my brother and the other adults. I smiled at them one last time and turned to Frank, I noticed he also had like a single tear running down his round, cute cheek. “Oh baby, look at you…you’re crying.” He weakly smiled and wiped away his tear. “Don’t worry about it. You’re not doing this alone.” I realized I was for the first time I was the strong one in the situation, and it felt really good. I knew why Frank liked to support me and comfort me aside from being in love with me, I just felt strong enough to make him feel at easy. He held my hand and nodded “You’re right. It’s all fine as long as I have you.” I leaned over quickly to kiss his cheek. He drove in silence, which let me know he was still thinking and probably not that okay.

When we got to the apartment, I got the key from my pocket, since Frank was carrying some bags. I allowed him to go inside first and walked behind him. “Home sweet home.” I said lowly smiling and looking at the not so empty apartment. Frank left the bags over our couch and then went to hug me tightly. “I love you.” He whispered. He didn’t sound sad but just emotional, and that made me hold him as tight as I could.

“Everything’s fine baby.” I assured. He nodded and pulled away. “Wanna change into your pj’s and watch some movie?” He nodded and went over to the couch where he had left the bags in which, we had our clothes. He stripped down to his boxers and just got a sweatshirt on. He plumped himself on the couch and made grabby hands at me, I giggled and got in a similar outfit and got over to cuddle him. “You get to pick the movie because you’re all touchy feely right now.” He nodded with a pout and rested his head over my chest. I got my laptop out and allowed him to search for the movie. He ended up looking for something not as old as what we were used to but a movie called submarine which turned out to be quite entertaining even though it had no horror or sci fi theme. I was caressing Frank’s sides and arms the whole time. I kissed the top of his head as well and he just looked up at me with puppy eyes. “Are you okay baby? I’m starting to get worried.”

“No, no I’m fine. It’s just the nostalgia of the first day. I’ll get it over it.” I nodded and tangled my legs with his. He hummed in response and turned back to the movie. When it was done, he helped me make our bed, it was an individual one because according to our parents one of us would sleep (most of the times) on the couch and the other one in the bed, but we had already planned to buy a bigger one as soon as Frank found a job, because even with as much as I like being close to him at night, that could be bad for our shoulders and neck, and with all the stress we were about to go through, the least thing we could do for ourselves was having a good sleep.

“Do you realize we switched roles today?” Frank asked as he got under the covers and immediately looked for my body, I pressed him close to me and nodded.

“Well yeah, but I don’t think I’m doing such a good job as you, I’m not making you feel better, and you always do that.” He shook his head that was now over my chest. “Just hold me, that’ll make it better.” He giggled and I felt him slowly drifting to sleep. That was good enough for me.


	40. Chapter 40

Chapter 40

A couple weeks later Frank was the one to get a job, that was relatively good for us, but it was a full time job, so that meant that I was alone for most of the time at our apartment until I got my part time one. So far I was helping him by waking up early with him and making him breakfast and giving him a couple kisses before having to part from him. I would clean, shower and nap and look for jobs online until he came back, we made dinner together sometimes, but sometimes I would do it about an hour before he came back so he could just arrive, give me a kiss and have dinner, we had a routine going already and it was good.

I was really proud of Frank ever since he got a job, it was a shitty customer service thing, but it paid the bills and Frank managed to get through it without having any mental breakdowns unlike me under any circumstance.

It was also about time for me to go to college and start my semester, Frank was being really supportive and encouraging because he knows me well, and even offered to get some kind of extra income in order for me not to get a job, but I refused and he made me promise that I would let him know if job got too stressful, I promised so and continued looking for one. Right now I was just cooking pasta like Frank’s mom had taught me to cook and some veggie mini sandwiches.

I heard him unlock the door -which for the first few days scared the fuck out of me until I got used to it- and left them in our little bowl by the door. “I’m home Gee” He stated happily, he took off his jacket and beanie and came over to the kitchen to hug me from behind.

“This is so domestic.” He giggled and kissed my neck which made me yelp.

“Frankie! Not now.” We both laughed, he pulled away and stood next to me watching me cook. “Is that my favorite dish?” He asked content, I nodded with a grin as I poured the tomato sauce over the pasta. “I swear to god, you’re the best, All a man could want when coming back from a stressful day at work is a homemade pasta and the best boyfriend ever.” I rolled eyes at him while we went over to the couch, since we ate there like daily.

“Quit being so cheesy.” I chuckled and sat down with him. “I was already done.” He shrugged with a smile and we started eating together while watching ‘One Step Beyond’ on my laptop.

“So how was your day?” He asked me, I turned to him and shrugged. “Fine I guess, I kept looking for jobs and the only ones I can seem to find are call centers, but you know how much I hate talking to people…it has a decent pay so, maybe if I don’t find anything different anytime soon.” I trailed off, he nodded but sighed.

“You know, I told you, you can just go to college and allow me to take care of you.”

“Maybe later Frankie, I mean, I should be able to do this, you’re able to have a job and not die while doing so, and so should I, you know?” He nodded understanding.

“Okay, I guess that’s fine. You should have your chance and test your own limits.” He continued eating, I pecked his cheek and imitated him.

When we were done, we sat by our window and just looked at the night sky, we had a really pretty view if we ignored the building across the street, and it wasn’t that close so it wasn’t as bad as you think.

 Frank was caressing my hand while we talked about our future and how we were planning on to sticking together for as long as we lived. “What about marriage? I mean it’s legal now.” Said Frankie, he knew I had come to terms with my sexuality but I was still hesitant on other subjects that involved being coming out to my family.

“I…I guess it‘d be okay…you know it’s a benefit for your partner, so I’d like to give you that title…my husband. I’m starting to believe that since I am the way I am, it’s because of god’s will so…if he made me like this, he won’t have an issue or send me to hell because I’m spending my life with another men.”  He gave me a disappointed look but nodded, he understood where I was coming from, but I guess he was at least slightly excited to hear I was not opposing to the idea of it.

“And having kids?” I sighed and leaned into his embrace.

“Again, I like the idea of it. Helping a kid that had a troubled background but it’s also very scary.” I mumbled he just chuckled.

“We’re a team of two, we could totally do it.”

“I guess.” He caressed my torso trying to get some warmth I guess, since it was kinda cold outside and we were by the window.

“But you do want to have a future with me right?” I nodded and pulled away just to look at him.

“Of course I want to Frankie. I couldn’t live without you and the fact that right now I’m scared of everything that we will have to go through while coming out, doesn’t mean that I won’t be like “Fuck the world, I don’t care” type of person one day.”

“Okay gee, I’m glad to hear that, I know it’s scary but we’ll go through this together.”

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Hey girls, I know it's a short chapter, and I'm sorry, but I promise I have longer, more interesting chapters to come. 
> 
> I wanted to ask you gurls if you'd be so kind to link me to your favorite, most fluffy and smutty   
> Frerard one shots/short fics. It seems like I read all of them already, so I'd like some help. Just leave them in the comments pls. Thank you!


	41. Chapter 41

Chapter 41

 A few weeks later I finally gave up and took the job as a call center operator. I got the training way too fast for my liking, because when I started taking calls I noticed there was so many questions I couldn’t answer because I barely remembered what I had been taught or how to say it nicely for them not to get mad at me because a lot of the rules and stuff we could do and not do for the customers was just ridiculous, and so the customer thought, because they yelled at me during pretty much for the entirety of my shift.  

It was awful, I was so stressed and annoyed with that job that I even got to go to college without even panicking about it because I was mentally crying the whole time about not wanting to go to work the next day. But truth was, we were barely making a living, so I had to suck it up and just past the next three years of my life absent minded and then see the rewards of it. Of course it easier said than done but, I had to help Frankie, I couldn’t let him be the one who always took care of me, I wasn’t a scared child that needed to be looked after, I was a teen that was living with his boyfriend not his baby sitter, and I just needed to be able to both work and study so I could be proud of all of my effort and so it paid off a couple of years later.

That’s all that I was telling to myself while this customer ranted about one of the items that the store I worked for delivered a day later than promised.

“Hello? Hello! Are you even listening to me young man?” I came out of my daydreaming and fixed my headset. “Yes ma’am, of course I am, I’m sorry I was just uh…verifying your account and it actually seems like it…it does not have enough funds for the purchase you were trying to make with us.” I got ready to hear her yell at me by setting the volume down a little.

“Are you kidding me!? I’ve been on the phone for fifteen minutes trying to do this, for your stupid system to lie and say I don’t have enough money!? You have to fix that, that’s not right! Oh my god, never mind. I wanna speak to a supervisor, you’re not smart enough.”

 _Yeah ma’am whatever._ I took off my headset after getting the call on mute and called for my shitty boss to take the call. I took my break after that and texted Frankie that I missed him and really wanted to just get home and have a cozy night with him. I really needed him.

I actually got to keep my cool for almost an entire semester, which I was really proud of, I was working really hard on my final projects which were taking a while since it was for one of my favorite classes, so I was really paying attention to the details and it was coming out great too, but that only meant that I had to be absent from work for a couple of days, and that was for just one of my projects, good thing they had very separate due dates.

So far I was content with myself, me and Frankie were just as loving and close as we’ve ever been, and I was actually proud of my art, like it didn’t look amateur anymore, and that was huge, but then the pressure at work was too much.

I had a really, really long call in which there was a massive problem with a return that got all messed up and the customer was the most angry person I had ever heard. She wanted her money right a fucking way as she said and she was not hanging up the phone until I somehow fixed this for her, which was nearly impossible, the only solution we had was to escalate to someone else, it was that bad, and that would take a minimum of twenty four hours, of course she was not happy to hear that, and I was so not happy to not be able to just wrap up that call and go about my day.

She was yelling and complaining so much that I actually got hooked on it and tried to talk her out of being so angry, I also tried telling her that I understood and all that good stuff that the bosses here tell you to say, but nothing was working, and then it happened. I suddenly got dizzy and I was not feeling well at all. I tried to take a breath but I just couldn’t, my sight went blank and that’s all I knew.

I woke up in a white room that was tiny but it was really silent. I tried to look around and I saw a nurse. “Don’t move too fast. How are you feeling?”

“I…uh I’m not sure. What happened?” I asked feeling my voice rough liked I hadn’t talked in quite a couple of hours.

“You had a mental break down I suppose, you passed out.” She said like she didn’t really care. Now I knew I wasn’t at a hospital but at my job’s nursery room.

“Okay...can I go home and rest?” She shrugged.

“I don’t know if your shift is over, but if you can’t take anymore calls for today than I guess I could tell them you’re pretty sick. Anyhow I had to call the only contact you had available, they didn’t pick up so I had to leave a voice mail.” I nodded and thanked her for whatever she might have done with me while I was unconscious and walked home. I figured I could skip college today, I was kinda late on my projects, so I would have a whole afternoon to try to finish them. When I got home I was still kind of dizzy but not enough that I had to lie down. So I changed into my comfy clothes and kept working on one of the paintings that I had to show in just a couple of days.

A few minutes in, I heard Frank walk inside quickly, I looked over the canvas and saw him with wide eyes and heavy breathing. “Are you okay?” I looked at him with a guilty look, I forgot to text him and let him know I was fine now.

“I guess? I’m still kind of dizzy.” He sighed and walked up to me then gave me a really tight hug. “I was so worried, like…oh god.” I heard his voice breaking, I felt really bad and held him just as tight. “I’m sorry, I feel a little bit better.” He let go off of me and nodded.

“I’m gonna stay here anyways.” I nodded and smiled, he went to the bathroom to take a hot shower. I stayed there and got really caught up in painting and stuff that even a few hours went by. “Gee can you drop that for a minute? You have not eaten; you have not even drink water the whole day. No wonder why you passed out.” I nodded absent minded but backed away from the painting, it was done anyway. I walked over to the couch but stumbled and fell to my knees. “I’m fine.” I giggled nervously.

“You’re not fine Gerard. Oh my god.” He ran up to me and helped me stand up, I was really cold and moving like a grandpa from standing so long without even stretching. He took me to the couch and gave me a glass of water and offered me the sandwich he had made for himself since I did not reply when he asked me if I wanted to have dinner. I lied back after having a couple sips and bites and tried to get warm under the cover Frank had placed over me.

“Gerard, you need to slow down. I know you want to be the best artist, and to have all of your woks to be perfect, but you can’t do that with every single one of them while trying to have the most stressful job ever and wanting to clean up and cook all the time, you just can’t. You kept all of the stress inside and now you’re collapsing.” I sighed and leaned forwards to hug him from behind.

“I’m gonna be fine.” I assured him. I had to calm down and be able to cope with stress. That was it.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Thank you everyone for reading, all comments and kudos are really appreciated <3


	42. Chapter 42

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Smut! Thank me later. lol

Chapter 42

I had to be fine for a while, I was in the middle of my vacation break to go to my second semester of Art school, I was doing great so far, but my job was still…so stressful. I was currently working on a painting, it was really dark, I had chosen the theme to be kind of obscure, and it would be a reflection of my anxiety, I was mostly doing this to let it all out and also have a stock of new paintings for school projects and why not, even try to sell them.

I had been standing there trying to finish it for once and for all, it was a Saturday night so it didn’t matter I stayed up late. But truth was, it matter because Frank was in our comfy puffy bed, reading all by himself. He must be feeling so lonely, when I´m so close but still not there with him. I dedicated to the last few details and sighed as soon as I was done, I took a step back and looked at my finished work, I felt a couple of arms hold me close from behind, I turned to kiss Franks lips and smile. “I’m sorry that I’ve been leaving you alone. I’ll focus on you from now on.” He smiled and nodded.

“Thank you Gee, I’d appreciate that.”

“I feel so bad, you’ve been just really understanding of me not being able to help you around that much because of school and, now that I’m on my break I’m still the shittiest boyfriend ever.” He shook his head and placed his hands on my cheeks now that I was facing him.

“Don’t ever say that Gee, you are the best boyfriend ever. I’m just doing what I’m supposed to do and understand you, and support you during busy times just like I always will, so don’t sweat it.” He said and pecked my lips. “Mhh, I missed that.” He whispered and looked at me with that hungry look that made me give in to his touch.

“Me too.” It came out more as a moan, which I was not intending. He smirked and leaned in to kiss me really slow, and sensually while he pulled me closer by my hips. I moaned lowly as soon as I felt that our bodies were touching now, he was so warm and inviting.

While the kiss got more heated, his hands made their way to my ass, he gave it a firm grip and pushed me towards his own hips, he was the one to release a groan due to the friction this time. He made me wrap my legs around his waist, I climbed up since we had tried this already a couple of times and even though I felt self conscious about my weight, Frank always made me feel more comfortable about it. He led us to our bed and not so gracefully made us lay on it in the same position we were in before. I pulled away just to chuckle, but that small laugh disappeared when he bucked his hips again and humped me for a couple seconds, I was already rock hard by the simple touch and teasing of my boyfriend and let me tell you, it was awesome.

He pulled away to take off my shirt, I took off his and caressed his chest, I could never get tired of his skin, it was beautiful and soft, I could kiss it and lick it all day. I made him pulled away a little more in order to unzip his pants and pull them down just enough to get his cock out of his boxers too. I laid my head on our pillow and motioned for him to get his hips at the level of my face, he bit his bottom lip and nodded understanding what I was about to do. He placed his thighs on each side of my shoulders and groaned as soon as he saw how close his cock was to my face, to be honest, my mouth was watering from the sigh of his member being so close, and knowing Frank was so turned on by this random idea that I got was even better.

“You want me to fuck your mouth Gee? Is that what you want?” I nodded slightly and moaned in response, I could tell he loved this, his cock was hot and really hard just in front of my eyes. “Go ahead sugar.” He whispered in that dark low voice he had when lust took over him. I started by licking it carefully, making sure I was reaching each spot on his shaft, I went up to the head and sucked it lightly just to tease and then down to his balls which I also licked and sucked for a little while otherwise I knew he would cum right away. I then placed half of his shaft inside of my mouth and moaned at feeling so full, I could see he was holding back from bucking inside or doing something else until I hollowed my cheeks around him. “I’m gonna fuck your mouth now baby.” He warned me and started by moving his hips really slow, he was almost teasing himself I think. I closed my eyes just enjoying the sensation, I allowed myself to take my hands to his ass and help him go faster on me, and he seemed to love that because he pulled my hair and started pounding faster grunting and moaning all kinds of obscenities.

“You’re doing so good sugar.” He encouraged me and started pounding into my mouth just like he would do in other circumstances, He looked so hot like this, he was sweating and moaning with his head tilt up moaning up to the ceiling with his eyes shut. And If I looked down I could see his messed up clothes that were pulled down just enough so that his cock could buck into my mouth, I had grown an obsession towards Frank’s body by now, I loved the amount of chub right above his crotch, the few tattoos over his beautiful skin, the way he just trimmed his hair but never really shaved it and I could see it when his shirt rode up sometimes, poking out of his underwear, he was just so hot and arousing to me so even if I was the one giving him pleasure, I enjoyed it so much. His movements got sloppy for a second before I could taste his hot load inside my mouth, I tried to swallow all of it, he pulled out quickly and gasped in front of me as he was coming down from his high, I looked up at him while caressing his hips and kissing all over that area.

He smiled and looked down at me “That was so-good” I chuckled and nodded. “You liked it so much because I love you.” I shrugged, he leaned down and kissed my lips, they were raw and swollen but I really liked that. He went down to my neck and chest and then palmed me trough my clothes. “That feels painful.” He smirked and pulled my pajama pants down then kept rubbing it over my boxer briefs making me gasp and buck up into the touch.

“I’m gonna fuck you so good Gee.” He whispered over my ear and then sucked my ear lobe, I moaned loudly this time, deciding not to hold back anymore.

“I really want that Frankie.” I gasped out and he pulled down my briefs and took my thighs making me spread open for him. By now I did not need any prep and so he knew, because he lined up right away and entered me making us both moan in pleasure, he leaned down and left a hickey on one of my collar bones. He started to buck slowly, I could hear his heavy, sexy breathing over me and that was almost enough to make me cum, but feeling him pounding into me as he decided to go faster, was even better. He also took his hand to my boner and started jerking me off as he moved. “You like that?” He asked in a husky tone I only managed to nod with eyes shut in pleasure. I moaned each time he moved because he was just pushing all my buttons. I actually cried out when he hit my prostate and went faster and harder on it as soon as he noticed, he was smirking, gasping and enjoying himself as much as I was doing, I just loved being intimate with Frank.

After a couple more minutes of stimulation I finally came in his fist and all over his stomach, he came for the second time tonight inside of me as I leaned into his body almost as if I was begging for it not to end. I was riding out my orgasm when he grabbed me by my hips and pushed me towards him so my back was arched and he had total access to my chest and neck, he kissed me all over and licked off some sweat then went to my lips and kissed me hungrily, I moaned as the sensations wore out and just hummed when he left his head over my chest breathing normally again. I caressed his head and played with his hair. I looked outside our window, it was actually snowing so it was getting cold inside due to a temporary issue with our heater. “Were gonna have to totally snuggle the whole time.” He looked up and made a confuse, sleepy sound then looked out the window too,

“Oh, well that’s fine with me.”

 

 

 

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Okay so I officially don't know what I'm doing, lol. I keep saying to myself that I don't want this to turn out to be one of those 70 chapters type of fic but i keep wanting to write so much other stuff. Anyway.
> 
> You'll have a christmas chapter, and I'd like to know what/how you guys are doing that day bc idk I'm a nostalgic motherfucker. (Also my birthday is on the 27th so...)
> 
> I also have two questions for u guys. Would anyone be interested in a tumblr blog that has like the best frerard fics? (an updated one) I know there's like a lot but lately I feel like I've read everything on here and i just can't find something I love. And second question/thing is, I'm offering to do fan arts for fanfickers and their work, so hit me up if you want one.   
> That's it, this is so long but whatevs. I'd really appreciate if you guys replied this time :< pls <3


	43. Chapter 43

Chapter 43

“Gee, I really think you should quit your job. Like this week.” Frank said in a serious tone as he caressed my bare chest, we were laying in bed on a Sunday morning after a long night of ‘quality time’ together. I sighed at his words and shrugged.

“You know we need the money Frankie.” I whispered and nuzzled his neck trying to avoid the subject. “And you also know that were doing just fine with the paintings you’re selling” He continued.

“But what if people stop buying them? Or what if I ware myself out creatively?” Those were all questions that I had more for myself, but I had found that talking about my worries with Frank would calm me down and see the other side of the issue.

“You can always try some other type of art aside from paintings, and Gee, come on, were in New York people here love art and they also love paying a reasonable price for it.” I thought about that for a minute, I had always wanted to try creating comics, and music, and other stuff and if I worked hard enough for it I know I could be as good in that as I was on plastic arts.

“Well, I guess I could try…But! I’m not quitting until I feel like we can afford that.” He rolled eyes at me playfully.

“Which would be _never_ ” he whined. I shook my head and pecked his lips trying to convince him. “No baby, it’ll be soon.” I assured. After a bit he nodded and that was good enough for me. I got up to take a shower and he happily followed me.

The next morning I was getting ready to go to work, I decided not to shower, or even look at myself in the mirror before leaving with Frankie. I was soon quitting that job, and I hated it so why bother?

As usual Frank walked me over to the call center building and then continued his way to the fancy restaurant he worked at. I was now sitting in my comfy chair, taking a while to open all of my tools just killing time because I seriously did not want to go ‘available’ and start taking calls. I had to start my shift because of my boss and I tried to help as many customers as possible, I really did, but the rules or system was just against me today. I finally gave up during a call with a pretty chill guy. “Alright I’ll wait then.” He said to me after I asked for a minute to fill out a form of a missing package of his. I sighed and forgot that I had my mic just in front of my nose and mouth. I heard the guy laugh “What was that sigh for? Did my package ended up in the other side of the world?” that actually made me giggle, he was already the nicest customer I had ever talked to so far.

“No sir, umm I just kinda…hate this job?” I said while scrolling down the Fed Ex page that had his package info “I mean you’re nice, but not all customers are, so…sorry about that.”

“Well, don’t worry about it I know how it is, and I’m sorry that you have to be there for people who don’t appreciate you.” He sounded just about my age so did not really understand how he was so nice to a mediocre call center operator like me.

“That’s really nice of you to say. Thank you.” I said smiling.

“No problem” He continued “You sound like a nice guy, and you’re not following your scrip like all of those robots which tells me you’re genuinely trying to help and understand the customer issues.” I was grinning by now, finally someone who noticed my effort, this guy had really just made my day. “Someone as nice as you should be working as whatever they want. If you can afford to quit that awful job, go ahead and do it.”

“Oh my god, you just made my day, seriously. You’re the best.” I heard him chuckle and sigh.

“I’m not, I just understand you and please, feel free to try to find me on Facebook or whatever.” He said, I giggled and nodded.

“I will, as of now I think I…I’m gonna go over to y boss and quit.”

“Alright, good luck. Can you just transfer me to someone else before you go about your day?” He asked politely.

“I’ll finish helping you out.” I said and gave him his information and solution before hanging up with a huge smile on my face, for the first time ever since I was hired I did not feel sick to my stomach. I went over to my boss and explained to him that I was leaving, of course he wasn’t happy but explained to me the process, so I could do it right away even though he begged me to stay for the rest of my shift because we were in the peak season. I refused of course and went over to human resources so I could quit right away and never come back.

I walked home to get some food before going to college, I was now going to be a lot more relaxed than before which was great, and I couldn’t wait to tell Frankie the good news. When I got to school, I noticed I even was there early, which was rare, I was always running around to make it on time and even be pissed at my teachers for calling me out because they just didn’t seem to understand that people have other things to do aside from coming here and paying a shit ton of money, but anyways, one of the teachers that I actually liked approached me with a positive look.

“So, Gerard…Remember I talked to you about this close friend of mine that has a gallery downtown…” She said in a really excited almost childish-like manner. “I showed her the painting I got from you and she absolutely loved it, she wants to support you so, as soon as you’re ready we’ll host a showcase!” She said thrilled, I smiled widely and nodded without being able to form actual words. I mean, my art? being displayed at New York? For free? Who would’ve thought that a guy like me could actually make something worthy of being shown at an art gallery. I was so psyched.

 

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Caxmensa: Omg those are some really rad presents, and I get u I'm not really excited for christmas either. High five haha, I actually want to get a tattoo as a present, I miss the pain lol.   
> Blurry_desolation: Wow that's a lot of people, I hope it's fun and not that stressful. 
> 
> Thank you guys for sharing and commenting! It does mean a lot. I'm posting kind of early bc I know you won't be able to read while having dinner and partying so haha. Merry christmas everyone and I hope you guys enjoy this stupid chapter. (probably the stupidest I've ever written)


	44. Chapter 44

Chapter 44

Frankie and I ended up celebrating that awesome day with some yummy dinner and some…fun things later on. I also happened to add that nice customer on facebook a few days later when I got bored. His name was Nathan and he lived in Manhattan and was very, very nice to me. I never had an online friend aside from Bert, but I could tell he was not talking to me for nudes or anything like that.

My teacher, her friend and I had set up a date for the showcase of my paintings, it was only a week away now and I was fricking out. Frank noticed this and decided to reassure me. “Are you nervous that people won’t like it or something? What is it?” He caressed my hand as we were sitting in bed watching a documentary that I had to make an essay on about the birth of pop art.

“Yeah, I guess. I mean, what If I pass by someone analyzing the painting and they’re laughing, or judging it and they say I’m an amateur? I…I don’t know I guess that’s my biggest fear.” Frank just chuckled and shook his head. “And now you’re laughing at me, great.”

“No baby, is just that somehow you manage to think about every little detail of the worst case scenario and…sorry, I know this has been stressing for you. But don’t worry about it, your teachers love your style and technique so that’s a great start, now you’ll only get to see how much other people like it.” I smiled and leaned into him to get a hug. I heard a buzz coming from my phone, it was probably my mom so I decided to check the notification real quick. It turned out it was actually Nathan, he was asking me how I was doing, and I told him the truth, I was anxious and doubting my talent, just like I was every other day I guess. I turned to the laptop screen to continue watching the documentary while I waited for a response. When I heard another buzzing sound I quickly grabbed it and read the message, I instantly got excited and couldn’t believe he was saying that. “Oh my god…Oh my god.” Frank turned to me confused. “What’s that?”

 

“My friend Nathan is saying that if this does not make me anxious or uncomfortable, he can come over to meet me and see my art tomorrow! I’ll finally meet my friend!”

“Oh…He’s not staying he is he?” I shook my head while replying to him.

“No, he’s just coming over for a little bit.” I finished typing and I looked up at Frank. “Frankie are you upset about it? Or…jealous?” I asked him with a hesitant look. He shrugged and leaned back into the pillows.

“I guess…I mean you just got so excited because of him…And you never get that excited with me because maybe I’m boring now that we have a routine.” I sighed and shook my head, I felt so bad that he thought we were just a routine now.

“No Frankie, please don’t say that. I l ove you, so so much. You’re the only man on earth that could make me as happy as I am now. Even if we have a routine, I love it, it’s my home. You are my home.” He looked up at me with a shy smile.

“Come here.” He hummed and held me close to his body. “I’m gonna have to re watch this by myself tomorrow.” I whined. He frowned “Why’s that?” I kissed his cheek softly and then pecked his lips.

“I can’t focus when you’re looking this good.” I said straddling his lap and giving his neck a couple of kisses. “Oh Gee…”

                                                                                  ***

The day of my showcase finally arrived, Frank and I had prepared our best clothes and we were ready to go. We were going to be early to help get everything set up and make sure it was the way I liked it, after all it was my art and my show. At least that’s what my teacher and her friend said.

Frank helped me carry one last painting that I had and we headed towards the gallery that was fairly close to college. When we got there my teacher was running around with a mop but managed to say ‘Hi’ in a way too happy tone for how much stress she seemed to be handling.

Frank walked up to her and said ‘Hi’ back. He took the mop and gave her a warm hug then helped her clean up. He was such a sweetheart, I sighed happily as I watched the empty place and started hanging my paintings carefully. Half an hour in, everything was starting to take form and look quite like a fancy showcase which I was totally excited about.

Frank came up to me with flushed cheeks and s little sweat on his forehead. “Wow, were you cheating on me or what’s up?” He laughed sarcastically.

“Haha. I was helping clean up this place for you. You’re welcome.” I pulled him in for a tight hug and kissed his cheek. “Thank you so much for helping me out and being so supportive baby.” I whispered rubbing his back lovingly. He seemed to relax to which he sighed and nodded. “That’s fine, you just owe me a massage when we get home.” I nodded fast.

“You get whatever you want baby.” I purred right over his ear in a way that my breath gave him shivers.

“Can’t wait to get home then.” He pulled away smirking, making me smile at him and just give him a playful slap on the shoulder. He held my hand and walked around with me to see if everything was set up. Frank wouldn’t let go of me as we waited for the actual opening to happen, he was peppering kisses all over my hands and face, I felt like so loved and warm inside, he completely made me forget about the anxiety and stress of this.

When the time came, some people walked around so it seemed like they were regular visitors and just went out to enjoy art on a Friday night, but then the customers I had sold some of my paintings to, came around wanting to see my latest works and willing to pay for the right one. The place got fill in a matter of thirty minutes, everyone was walking around and looking at the art I had so hard worked on, most of them did not really knew I was the artist, so they’d just remain in silence analyzing, and god knows who was an art critic and was internally laughing at it. I also happened to see some students that were ahead of me for a couple semesters, they were all smiling and that made me think _they’re laughing and thinking its shitty. Great._  I did not get to see Frank for a little while because there was some people asking legitimate questions and praising my work, that was nice of course but it was a lot of pressure, both being social and thinking really hard about my answers not to look like an idiot. As soon as I got the chance I got out of the gallery through the front door. It was kinda cold outside but it didn’t matter because inside, due to all of the people, it was a fricking hell.

I felt really anxious, like I craved something but I didn’t know what it actually was. I looked around and saw a tall blond-ish guy standing a couple feet away from me, he was smoking, I then remembered that Frank used to do it, and he would do it when he was nervous, when we barely talked. I figured smoking would calm me down a little.

I went up to him without even thinking, I had already talked to so many people I didn’t know tonight, that another one wouldn’t matter. I smiled up at him since he was considerably taller thank me and said “Hi…I’m sorry to bother you but do you think I could get a drag of that cigarette?” He turned to me and smiled back. “Sure. Here you go.” He handed me the tobacco and I hesitantly placed it in my mouth, I took a drag and immediately started coughing a little. “Oh, careful there, first time smoking?” I just nodded with half a pout because of the taste of it. How could Frankie like that? “Why would you choose to smoke for the first time with a stranger in the middle of the street?” He chuckled and took the cigarette back. 

“I figured it would calm me down.” I shrugged. He nodded and looked inside the gallery trough the window glass. “If you’re not enjoying the showcase then why are you here?”

“I’m the artist.” I said wrapping my arms around myself since it was cold out. “Not in a Tommy Bisseu kind of way though.” I giggled.

“The room…nice reference.” We both chuckled, I just nodded but then stopped laughing. “Wait, are you Gerard?” I titled my head confused.

“Yeah I am why’s-“ My voice got muffled since he pulled me in a tight hug. Since he was taller my face was completely smashed against his chest.”

“It’s me! Nathan!” I gasped excitedly and pulled away to finally give a face to his name. “It’s you! Hi!” I giggled, he did not let go off my shoulders as we talked in a rush as to how great it was finally to meet each other. I heard the door open and a few steps, I looked back and noticed Frank was walking up to us with a rather upset look. “Hey Frankie, look who’s here. Nathan made it!” He nodded without breaking the eye contact with Nathan. Even though he was the shortest of us, his vibe was quite intimidating. He wrapped an arm around my waist, which made my friend let go off of me finally.

“Yes, of course. Nice to meet you.” He extended his hand and gave Nathan a firm hand grip then gave him a smile, not the usual warm one that made me doze out. I could tell he wasn’t completely happy.

“Nice to meet you too Frank. I’m guessing, you’re Gerard’s boyfriend?” He nodded.

“You bet I am! And you must be that customer turned into a friend?” He giggled nervously and nodded. “I guess that’s me. Just here to enjoy the showcase and meet Gerard.” I couldn’t say I was complete put off by Frank’s attitude, it felt quite good to know he was so protective of me.

“Well in that case, let’s go back inside.” Frank proposed. We all nodded and started walking towards the door. “Good idea, I’m very cold.” I said trying to break the rather tense atmosphere.

“Oh, why didn’t you say so babe?” He asked in the cheesiest way possible which made me grin. It wasn’t like he was being someone completely different to how he usually is, but I just liked the sudden act of affection. He pulled me closer. “I was actually looking for you.” He said as he looked into my eyes, Nathan was walking right in front of us but I was sure he could hear us.

“Well, I was anxious and tried to smoke, I asked Nathan for a drag then realized it was him.” I explained with a smile. He nodded “Oh, so you smoked?” He made a pause that made Nathan look back to see what he was doing, and also we were back inside so he was probably waiting for guidance. “Let’s see.” He kissed my lips in a soft, tender way opposite to what I was expecting. “Yes, you were. Did you like it?” I made a pout and shook my head. “I thought so”. He purred and looked into my eyes, when he was about to kiss me, Nathan cleared his throat looking around.

“So, where should we start?” I turned to him and nodded. “Sorry, let’s go this way.” We started walking down the hallways and the two rooms, I briefly explained some of the paintings, he seemed to enjoy them a lot. We talked about trivial stuff all of this while Frank had his arm firmly around me. I liked Nathan a lot still; he was funny and understood me. Frank even ended up laughing at some of our jokes and relaxed.

I actually got to sell a little more than half of all of the paintings brought to the gallery, which I was psyched about. And I got a lot of advise but also kind words of encouragement. Tonight was great, and it only got better when Frank decided to take me to a different room right next to the bathroom. It seemed like it was where they would storage things to get the gallery together. “Oh, so this is where the mop came from.” I said as he closed the door behind him. I turned to him and saw _that look_. “What’s up Frankie?” He walked up to me slowly, he loosened his tie –Yes, he even made the effort to wear a tie just for me.- and shrugged with that seductive look on his face. When he reached up to me, he took my hand and gave it a soft kiss as he looked into my eyes, my knees were already shaking.

“Nothing, I just figured I’d steal my love from all of those people for a little bit.” He whispered and unbuttoned my shirt slowly. “We can’t do this here Frankie.” I said lowly, as soon as he got his hands inside my shirt my voice hitched.

“Mhh I feel like breaking the rules. How about that?” His smirk came back and started working on my belt, when he took it off he started palming me over my black skinny jeans. I moaned lowly and bit my bottom lip trying to hide my pleasure even though I didn’t not want him to stop anymore.

“You think someone else could make you shiver by just touching you? Uh?” He asked over my ear, I now knew what this was all about. He had liked playing this game before, making me know who I belonged to and I loved it.

“No Frank…” I whispered and just let him take care of me. “That’s right baby boy. No one can…just me.” He said and lowered my pants just below my bum then grabbed me by the hips to turn me around in a quick movement. By now I was half hard and just waiting for Frank to give me everything. He grabbed my butt and slapped one of my butt cheeks a couple times. “Look at that cute little butt. Who does it belong to Gee? Mhh?” He asked giving me a firm grip and making me moan and turn back to him. “It’s yours Frankie.”

Frank spread my butt cheeks open and then I just heard him unzip his pants then the next thing he did was grind against me. “You want this in you?” I nodded quickly. “Yes Frankie…please, I can’t wait” He groaned, I knew he loved it when I begged for it. He had to use some spit to lube himself up but when he went it in, it was fine, I just moaned at being so full and spread open.

He started bucking up in short, fast movements. I could tell he was going for a quick rough fuck that would ware me out. Just a few minutes later he was trying to reach my prostate, and when he found it making me cry out in pleasure and lean back to him. He pounded into me while grabbing my hips, he was leaving bruises but I didn’t care, I just wanted this to never stop, I stroked myself a couple of times and clenched around him as I came all over the wooden floor and he did so inside of me a couple seconds later. I felt spent but so good. He helped me clean up and fix my clothes back on. When we were ready we went outside and I couldn’t help my massive grin, Nathan was still around so we decided to go to a diner to have food as soon as the event was over. It was one of the best nights of my life, without a doubt.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> One more chapter to go and we're done! The chapter so far is short and like "Meh" but I'm kinda fed up with the story and ready to start a new one so...Maybe I'll make a one shot as an epilogue, tell me what you guys think and happy new year!
> 
> Thanks everyone for reading!


	45. The end

Chapter 45

4 years later.

I quickly grabbed the loft keys and locked the door behind me not without saying bye to sweet pea. I walked down the street fast, knowing exactly where I was going.  I knew this place, and I knew I was late, but it wasn’t like musicians were always on time, but I was just so excited to finally see Frankie again even though I  had a lot of stuff to do, with all free lance art classes and tutoring, among my various art exhibitions with one of the best art dealers; Charles Saatchi, that was actually a big deal because my work sold individually for almost a million dollars since the price of art these days relays heavily on both my own reputation, and my art dealer reputation, and Charles was one of the most known art dealers. Our economic position was great now, Frank and I managed to support our parents and we moved the upper class part of New York, we were still the same but just able to help our family and live comfortably.

 After all, even with this new hectic lifestyle we both had, we missed our old routine, of just laying around and watching the same movies over and over even if it got boring after a month or two. Truth was, it has been one of the busiest years of my life and I already graduated college, so go figure.

Frank was finally coming back from his band world tour. Tonight was the last show and I was a little late, but it was fine, I only get to talk to him after the shows anyways.

I arrived to the place and his manager greeted me and took me to the side of the stage, they almost finished the first song. Before he started the second one he caught a glimpse of me and smiled warmly. I sighed in relief at finally seeing him in front of me and just nodded for him to doze out and continue playing.

When the show was over he waved everyone goodbye and ran up to me and gave me a tight hug. I finally was able to relax and know his arms were there to hold me and comfort me again. This experience had taught me that I could be both alone and with Frank next to me and I was going to be _just fine_. The night terrors, the absurd anxiety and internal debate was all over and I still had the love of this wonderful man that had stood with me during the process of growing up and becoming my best self. I now had his embrace without the need of being protected but just loved.

“I missed you Gee.” He said tangling his fingers through my hair making me laugh.

“Me too Frankie. So much. Wanna go home?” He nodded quickly before pecking my lips, we heard the crowd still around and some girls get excited since the angle they were in allowed them to see us and maybe take pictures of us, we didn’t care anymore. We both were out and happy and Frank had an amazing fandom that supported him.

I held his hand as we walked backstage “We better go.” I said since I could read in his expression that he just wanted to get home already after such hectic six months.

“I’m extremely tired.” He sighed as soon as we got home.

“Good thing I’m here for you. For as long as you want me.”

“Well that is forever then.”

“I’ll be here.” He grinned and pecked my lips and wrapped his arm around me. “I get to choose the movie tonight.” he said and hurried towards the couch I shook my head and rolled eyes at him. “Popcorn?”

“Yes babe, please” he said from the living room. I looked over at him while the popcorn was in the microwave and I started thinking about the time we met, and how much I wanted to be normal. Through the years I happened to learn that a love like ours was everything but normal. Not a lot of people have a relationship like ours, full of trust, love and so caring. We were incredible, nowhere around standard but I had to see that and appreciate it as I got a little older.

And so you will.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Alright so the ending was shitty but I guess the story was kind of okay? Again, keep in mind this is my first english fic. (Spanish speaker here, hi!) so that might've made it really basic. I do have an epilogue in mind so stay tuned and I also have another fic plot, I'll probably start writing soon but I also go back to college next week so, just be patient! I do have more stuff to come and they'll be fluffy and you'll love them. 
> 
> Caxmensa: Honestly thank you so much for commenting so much and reading me! You're the best! <3
> 
> Lesley: Thank you so much for the support! It does mean a lot <3
> 
> And also thank you everyone who read this thing and gave it kudos and comments it meant a lot and there's more to come, so if you enjoyed this, stay tuned :) <3

**Author's Note:**

> If you enjoyed it please leave a fucking comment, I am very lonely. (yes i stole that from Drew Monson)


End file.
